No desire for pentration

[RMB]

Hi, I have only ever been in relationships with males. I have been curious about females for a long time but have not acted on my curiosity. I am really turned on by the idea of tribbing with a woman and would love to try it. I have no desire for any penetration be it will male or female.. I guess what Im asking is does that make me not asexual? I love the idea of closeness and emotional connection and rubbing my parts on a female parts for pleasure, but thats as far as it goes. Has anyone experiened anything similar and has anyone tried tribbing? Thank you 

[Lord Jade Cross]

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[Glenninindy]

Yes , but the initial physical thrill got quickly rubbed out by my Ace eraser.

Edited May 25, 2019 by Glenninindy

[Guest]

Not all sexuals like penetration. Not enjoying all partnered sexual activities doesn't make one asexual. I don't like PiV, doesn't mean I am ace. 

[everywhere and nowhere]

We really need to stop thinking of PIV as "The Sex" and all other sexual activities as "not really sex".

 

Still, for me it is clear: I actively don't want to have any kind of partnered sexual activity. So I'm pretty much (functionally) asexual.

[Guest]

I feel like if you're playing around in the vicinity of possible orgasm, you're having sex. 

[Guest]

2 hours ago, Skullery Maid said:

I feel like if you're playing around in the vicinity of possible orgasm, you're having sex. 

Yeah, basically. Unless its a fetish you dont know you are triggering and they have one unintentionally (but thats such a rare scenario...). 

 

Partnered sexual activity is so varied. You can do a million and one activities together for sexual fulfillment and never once do penetration. That doesnt make you a virgin with no sexual desire... that just means you dont like traditional sex acts. Which some dont. 

 

TMI

 

 

If you prefer to tie up your partner and have them masturbate in front of you so you can watch and use an external vibrator on yourself, thats still a partnered sex act. Doesnt even matter you arent stimulating each other physically.

 

[ryn2]

I guess I’m split on this one.

 

I completely agree that there are a plethora of partnered sexual activities available, that it’s fine and probably even not uncommon to prefer some of those activities to penetrative sex, and that intrinsically wanting sexual, non-penetrative activities for sexual pleasure “counts” as being sexual...

 

...but I don’t think that changes the (fairly narrow) definition of “virginity.”  To me there are just situations and people where the concept of virginity doesn’t really apply.

[Aimeendfire]

@ryn2 so then only Penetrative sex counts towards cashing in your V card then? 

 

As as for the OP , I agree with what others have sex that just because you don’t have penetration that doesn’t automatically equal asexuality.

[ryn2]

Virginity has a specific (rather arbitrary and dated) meaning.  It doesn’t mean “sexually active”... so, yes, it doesn’t apply to people  whose sexual preferences exclude (for whatever reason) penetrative sex.

 

It’s like... I’ve driven, bicycled, walked, run, rollerbladed, snowshoed, and ridden horses on the roadway, but I’m not a motorcyclist because I’ve never driven or ridden on a motorcycle.  The problems start when people think riding a motorcycle is the only cool, grown-up way to travel.

[ryn2]

(if people want to expand the meaning, that’s fine; I’d just prefer to see the concept die out, the way municipalities have started removing the “consummation” requirement for legal marriage)

[Guest]

Yeah the virginity thing really bugs me. I technically lost my virginity at 21, but that tells you nothing about when I started having sex. 

 

Now, I'll agree from a medical standpoint, sex as PIV makes sense because of the pregnancy and STD factors. Outside of the medical realm, I think it's a more harmful concept. 

[Lord Jade Cross]

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[Guest]

1 minute ago, Jade Cross said:

Wait but sex wouldnt be limited to PIV and STD are transferable throught other acts as well. So wouldnt itmmake sex.tomcount all those other acts to be sex as as well?

There's a genuine difference between a man ejaculating inside a woman and.... everything else. I don't feel like I need to expand upon that more fully. 

[ryn2]

21 minutes ago, Skullery Maid said:

Now, I'll agree from a medical standpoint, sex as PIV makes sense because of the pregnancy and STD factors. Outside of the medical realm, I think it's a more harmful concept. 

*nods*

[everywhere and nowhere]

5 hours ago, Skullery Maid said:

I feel like if you're playing around in the vicinity of possible orgasm, you're having sex. 

With the exclusion of entirely solitary activities. I agree that autoeroticism is a sexual activity, but it isn't sex.