Jump to content

Is it cruel to cut someone off completely?


Anonymous123456

Recommended Posts

6 minutes ago, Solovei said:

Which you can do on facebook *with* actual conversation. I just don't get staying in touch (which is what I was talking about) just with photos. But - to each their own. The pathological selfie-snappers are on all social media, after all.

Yeah, the people I know who are on insta connect in some other way (irl, or via another platform) and just use insta for photos.  But to each their own....

Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Solovei said:

Facebook is what you make of it. I don't play games nor am I forced to.

Lucky you for your friends on facebook not expecting you to do certain things. My feeling was that I wasn't able to make facebook what I make of it. In my example it created expectations of what I was supposed to put on there and how much I needed to share, which in my case was often too little for my friend's liking. But yes, if you can make of it what you like I can see far more of a point to it than instagram.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Anonymous123456
5 hours ago, ryn2 said:

Yeah, the people I know who are on insta connect in some other way (irl, or via another platform) and just use insta for photos.  But to each their own....

As an Instagram user, I often use to to DM my friends funny posts etc, much as you can do on Facebook. It does have messaging functions, but a lot of it is a rip-off of Snapchat, which I use as my main messaging app.

Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, grigor1860 said:

to DM my friends funny posts 

emo28.gif

Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, Acing It said:

Lucky you for your friends on facebook not expecting you to do certain things. My feeling was that I wasn't able to make facebook what I make of it. In my example it created expectations of what I was supposed to put on there and how much I needed to share, which in my case was often too little for my friend's liking.

I hear this often. Never bothered with all that, my friends are luckily all old school. Have to admit, though, seen them much less since I moved. Also I barely made any new friends the last decade or so. I can image how teenagers/adolescents are having a hard time. Avoiding facebook is definitely not the easy way.

 

8 hours ago, Moonman said:

I wouldn’t block them because that sends a more antagonistic message than just this particular friendship having ran its course.

I agree. Unless of course they're being too bothersome. Some people I know change their phone numbers every once in awhile to shake off unwanted contacts. Less risk of antagonizing anyone, but a bit more hassle.

Link to post
Share on other sites

If you don't really talk that much anymore no, but I wouldn't go as far to block them or anything drastic unless they've been horribly rude/offensive or have done something that has scared me/really creeped me out. I've had friendships fizzle out, we just went our separate ways and never spoke to one another again, it just happens.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I believe it is childish and weak to blocking her. the mature response would be to break up with her stating the reason you have listed to us. I only block people that are harassing me like trolls or ex's that won't let go. this gives her an opportunity to apologize and rekindle the relationship as it was initially or agree she has no interest in being your friend any more. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Touchofinsight

No I don't think its always cruel. Relationships change over time depending on how you interact some just fade away. Life is a series of choices that almost always inevitably end up in some form of conflict with someone or some thing.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Anonymous123456
On 5/27/2019 at 6:05 AM, shyramary said:

I believe it is childish and weak to blocking her. the mature response would be to break up with her stating the reason you have listed to us. I only block people that are harassing me like trolls or ex's that won't let go. this gives her an opportunity to apologize and rekindle the relationship as it was initially or agree she has no interest in being your friend any more. 

The problem being that I have expressed these concerns to her, and she has done little to try and mend our friendship. Having given it all I’ve got, it has run its course. I’m just trying to decide, having put her before me so many times before, what course of action benefits me.

Link to post
Share on other sites

then I would officially terminate the friendship telling her I made several attempts to salvage our relationship without any support from you. consequently I am ending our relationship completely today. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Anonymous123456
16 minutes ago, shyramary said:

then I would officially terminate the friendship telling her I made several attempts to salvage our relationship without any support from you. consequently I am ending our relationship completely today. 

That’s a good shout. I shall wait a few more days then execute that.

Link to post
Share on other sites
SaharaJadehart

I can relate what you are going through. I have been struggling in that situation right now. Almost all the people around me keep on nagging for me to block that person. I am still trying to stability for my bruised feelings since I am a sentimental person. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

If someone doesn't server a purpose to my life I will cut them loose regardless of how anyone feels or doesn't feel about it. I've had scenarios where I been through stuff alone and had no one to talk to and certain people were nowhere to be seen. If you're not in it for the long haul then you don't serve a purpose to me is what I always say. I have no time for fair weather friends.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had it done to me and I've done it to people. The main reasons for it being done to me was lack of common interest, we stopped communicating effectively, and no longer being in an environment where we saw one another frequently. Like several of my old college friends kind of just died off because we weren't constantly going to class and seeing each other every other day. It takes commitment to continue on that friendship after college and many people preferred not to be bothered with it rather than putting effort to talk every other day. Even when I tried to keep up the communication, it will eventually become too one sided and I stopped contact. You know when a friendship dies is when you stop contacting them and they make no effort to contact you. I'm not mad at this anymore though. We had a good time once upon a time and now we are passed that. It happens.

 

I've stop talking to a person because of no common interest between us, we were no longer in an environment where we saw each other every day, the relationship was very one sided(if we had a conversation it was always about her), she say a lot of problematic things, and the person was extremely selfish and didn't take other people feelings into account.  I stopped trying to contact her and I have no regrets about that. Life is too short to to keep up fake friendships. Sometimes things don't work out and it okay.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Strange_Charms
On 5/24/2019 at 3:40 PM, nineGardens said:

^^ this

 

 

To answer your question in a GENERAL sense (less to do with your specific context). Yes, cutting people off is cruel... but it will in some cases be the gentle option, both for yourself, and the other person.

 

In this case, I might suggest not "cutting then out", so much as just not keeping in touch. If you don't reach out and you don't start conversations, then by the sounds of it, it will be done.

If in a few years they want to get back in touch, I see no reason to stop them (although, if you'd prefer not to, then by all means)

I agree completely!! 

 

I've had cases where friendships go south or fade and just quietly 'letting them go' (not reaching out anymore, etc) was the way to go. Typically, I don't actively block anyone or cut off all possible avenues of connection unless the situation was toxic enough (you feel unsafe and/or uncomfortable interacting with them) that I feel it's warranted. However, if it's for their and especially, most importantly, your own comfort and safety, I don't think it's cruel or unwarranted. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...