Someone Confused Posted May 19, 2019 Share Posted May 19, 2019 Hey, Im male 23 years old. I always thought i was gay, i like guys and i feel attracted to guys. But the thing is, whenever i tried to hookup with someone, i didnt enjoy it. i enjoyed only kissing and touching each other and stuff like that, i dont like oral/anal now im confused, a friend of mine told me that i might be just a confused straight, i think that i might be Asexual, but do Asexual enjoy kissing and thing about sex when they do that? Like, whenever i kiss someone i really REALLY look forward for the sex, and i get disappointed because i dont enjoy it, im kind of indifferent when im having sex, i dont feel pleasure like people are describing it.. Honestly i always tell myself that im just too nervous to enjoy sex for now, and i need a relationship and try sex with him, someone i know and truly love and not someone i just met Is something wrong with me? am i Asexual? Should i try girls (i was never attracted to girls)? Honestly im attracted to men's bodies more than the penis or ass... I hope i didn't came out of the closet for nothing hahaha You can ask whatever you want, i will answer and i hope you could help me because im super confused 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted May 19, 2019 Share Posted May 19, 2019 You might be homoromantic asexual, many asexuals (mostly romantic asexuals) enjoy kissing and cuddles and other stuff like this. But you can try to date girls if you want. Maybe you'll like it. Who knows. As you are new member, cake for you Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Someone Confused Posted May 19, 2019 Author Share Posted May 19, 2019 1 hour ago, MaggieB said: You might be homoromantic asexual, many asexuals (mostly romantic asexuals) enjoy kissing and cuddles and other stuff like this. But you can try to date girls if you want. Maybe you'll like it. Who knows. As you are new member, cake for you By how i describe it, is it possible that im gay and asexual? that's a possibility? 1 hour ago, Dreamsexual said: Hello someone confused I really can't answer your questions, I'm afraid, they're beyond my experience. But I can welcome you here, and tell you that there's folk here probably can give you advice and support Its a tradition here to offer newbies cake, so would you care for a slice? Hahaha thanks! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted May 19, 2019 Share Posted May 19, 2019 Welcome to AVEN! You could be a Homoromantic Asexual. Asexuality is not a lack of libido, but a lack of Sexual Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have sex with someone. Meaning if what you're feeling doesn't lead to the desire to have sex with the person you're feeling it towards, then it's not Sexual Attraction, even if it is an attraction or arousal. But there are other types of attraction besides Sexual Attraction. There's Romantic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have a romantic relationship with someone. There's Sensual Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have intimate non-sexual physical contact with someone, like kissing or cuddling. There's Aesthetic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to appreciate someone's aesthetic beauty. There's Platonic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have a deep friendship with someone. And more. It sounds like you experience Arousal with Sensual Attraction. Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's a Teapot Standing Cake, 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Someone Confused Posted May 20, 2019 Author Share Posted May 20, 2019 7 hours ago, MichaelTannock said: Welcome to AVEN! You could be a Homoromantic Asexual. Asexuality is not a lack of libido, but a lack of Sexual Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have sex with someone. Meaning if what you're feeling doesn't lead to the desire to have sex with the person you're feeling it towards, then it's not Sexual Attraction, even if it is an attraction or arousal. But there are other types of attraction besides Sexual Attraction. There's Romantic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have a romantic relationship with someone. There's Sensual Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have intimate non-sexual physical contact with someone, like kissing or cuddling. There's Aesthetic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to appreciate someone's aesthetic beauty. There's Platonic Attraction, which I define as leading to the desire to have a deep friendship with someone. And more. It sounds like you experience Arousal with Sensual Attraction. Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's a Teapot Standing Cake, Huh, impressive cake! and about the stuff you wrote: im kind of confused now. im also DYING for a relationship with someone, and i think i can also fit myself in the other 2 options. also, i forgot to write that i did have pre-cum while having sex few times, even tho i didnt feel the enjoyment, might be because of the kissing and stuff tho, i dont know.. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AcornCarvings Posted May 20, 2019 Share Posted May 20, 2019 It sounds like you could be ace and gay maybe? It's possible to be both attracted to men, but not want to have sex with them. You could be attracted to men romantically but not sexually, or you might be in some gray area in between. Being physically aroused though isn't the same as enjoying stuff, and isn't the same thing as attraction. People's parts get physically aroused all the time for a bunch of different reasons or stimuli and although sometimes it correlates with desire or enjoyment, they are definitely not always hand in hand. As for if you're straight, If you've never really been interested in girls then I kinda doubt you'd be into stuff, but who knows? you could try things out if you wanted to. Anyways, welcome Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Someone Confused Posted May 20, 2019 Author Share Posted May 20, 2019 4 hours ago, AcornCarvings said: It sounds like you could be ace and gay maybe? It's possible to be both attracted to men, but not want to have sex with them. You could be attracted to men romantically but not sexually, or you might be in some gray area in between. Being physically aroused though isn't the same as enjoying stuff, and isn't the same thing as attraction. People's parts get physically aroused all the time for a bunch of different reasons or stimuli and although sometimes it correlates with desire or enjoyment, they are definitely not always hand in hand. As for if you're straight, If you've never really been interested in girls then I kinda doubt you'd be into stuff, but who knows? you could try things out if you wanted to. Anyways, welcome What's ace? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamsexual Posted May 20, 2019 Share Posted May 20, 2019 On 5/20/2019 at 12:20 PM, Someone Confused said: What's ace? . 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AcornCarvings Posted May 20, 2019 Share Posted May 20, 2019 2 hours ago, Dreamsexual said: 2 hours ago, Someone Confused said: What's ace? Asexual. yeah sorry for using confusing lingo 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamsexual Posted May 20, 2019 Share Posted May 20, 2019 On 5/20/2019 at 3:12 PM, AcornCarvings said: yeah sorry for using confusing lingo . 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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