;w; Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 So ... I have a question, well, some time ago I said it was aromatic because I was not totally sure of my romantic orientation, what happens is that now I do not know if I'm homoromantic or biromantic, because I like girls. I'm in love with one of the girls at my school, I really love her * - *. It was a very difficult process for me to accept that I like the same sex as me, but I have the doubt of being biromantic because I think I fell in love with a boy like almost five years ago, but I'm not sure about that because what I really wanted in that was that he was my best friend, and likewise I only find men aesthetically attractive, and I lost more interest in them after recognizing that I liked women and accepted myself. , Could anyone help me please? Link to post Share on other sites
MissMidnight Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 Look in a mirror and say Im Biromantic then do the same with homoromantic. Which one feels right. Sometimes hearing the wrong answer will make you know the right one for you. Link to post Share on other sites
NoraGrace Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 There are two possibilities: you could have just thought you liked this boy because that’s what society’s norms had taught you, or you actually did like him. There is a possibility that you only like girls now and not boys, or you like both. Only you can know for sure. Just remember that bisexuality (or biromanticism) does not mean liking boys and girls equally. You can like only gender more over the other and still be bi. It sound to me like you are biromantic but prefer girls. But like I said before, only you can know for sure. Don’t let my input alone determine how you feel. Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 From what you said, either, as @NoraGrace suggests, you're biromantic but experience stronger attraction to girls; or homoromantic and what you felt towards this boy was a squish but because of heteronormativity you thought that was what crushes were. From the fact that you say confidently that you know you love this girl, yet think you loved the boy, but probably just wanted to be his friend, I kind of think the latter. But A) Only you can say and B) Attraction labels can change. Being an ace lesbian is beautiful and valid and if you find that's what you are, please accept yourself Link to post Share on other sites
Mousse Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 The first thing I want to say is that crushes do not always feel the same. Some feel stronger than others. Just because the feeling you had for the boy is not exactly the same as how you feel for the girl does not mean it wasn’t a crush. It might mean the draw was simply not quite as strong. IT COULD be something else, but I can’t know from what you said alone. I say that because I believe that to want someone as a friend and want someone to be your BEST friend is very different. When I was 13 and I had my very first huge crush, I wanted to get as emotionally close as possible to the person— and in my 13 year old asexual mind, that meant best friends. I don’t think it’s important to figure out IMMEDIATELY whether you are bi or not. Take some time to reflect and just live your life. I think the most important thing is to just accept yourself as who you are, and not feel bad for loving someone... and I see that you’re already doing that! I wish you luck, and peace. Link to post Share on other sites
CoonGoon Posted April 26, 2019 Share Posted April 26, 2019 I, too, said I was aromantic for some time-! I was questioning for a while, but I have recently found myself to be Biromantic. It's okay not to know for certain, and as others have said, romantic orientation can change over time-! Saying you're biromantic with a preference for girls does leave you more open, but if that doesn't feel like who you are, it's okay to be homoromantic. However, nobody can tell you what is and isn't love. That is something only you can figure out, as everyone experiences it differently. I... Hope this was somewhat helpful, but I am still kind of new to all of this. Link to post Share on other sites
Homer Posted April 27, 2019 Share Posted April 27, 2019 Just stop trying to slap a label on yourself and take things the way they come. It doesn't matter what it's called - all that matters is that you're happy and content with what you feel. Link to post Share on other sites
;w; Posted May 16, 2019 Author Share Posted May 16, 2019 Well I thought a lot about this and I really know that I did not like that boy, I really felt close to him but, it was because we were similar about the things we liked, I never found someone in my life that was pretty "similar" to me, but I actually felt pretty pressured by my classmates and they always asked me if I liked him and I felt it should be like that, because I was a girl and I grew up in a very homophobic environment (of course I was’t like that :v) but what I really wanted was his friendship but in a close way, I always felt pressured by others about what i should feel for men, but i’m only attracted to them in a aesthetically way UwU, I do not know why I write this but I think it helps me to write here as a way of accepting myself and feeling more secure, I really feel very safe in AVEN :3, so ... I think I can proudly say that I like women :'3💖🏳️🌈 pd: sorry for my bad english :'v Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamsexual Posted May 16, 2019 Share Posted May 16, 2019 On 5/16/2019 at 4:05 PM, Valeria-I521 said: I really feel very safe in AVEN Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted May 16, 2019 Share Posted May 16, 2019 5 hours ago, Valeria-I521 said: I think I can proudly say that I like women :'3💖 🏳️ 🌈 Yay! *Sprinkles rainbow confetti* Congrats for discovering something about yourself, I'm so proud of you Link to post Share on other sites
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