Bi, dating, & platonic love - does anyone else feel like this?

[Sugar Clouds]

Hi, I don't know if this is the correct forum for this, but I'll just put it here for now. To give some background info: I have never dated anyone before & am demi romantic. I do think about dating a lot, but being bi and all I find it a bit of a struggle. Why? Not just because I'm demi romantic but because I sometimes think that I would be fine if I never ever had a boyfriend. The reason? I have strong platonic love for my male friend - not just a friend but a best friend at that. We've been best friends since kindergarten (still are but haven't seen each other for a few years due to his move). Since I have such a strong bond & friendship with him I think to myself "I'd be OK without a boyfriend. Who could ever treat, care for, & respect me as good as he does?" Sure, I don't have a romantic attraction or any other attraction but friendly ones towards him. I do think about him a lot these days since I don't see him. I think about the fun stuff we could possibly do as close friends in adulthood if we meet back up again. I wouldn't mind if we lived together in the future since I know both of us will eventually find a romantic partner at one point. I'm fine with that. But why is it such a struggle? Isn't it odd that a girl who is bi wouldn't mind not having a romantic relationship with the opposite sex? I'm attracted to both sexes and genders yet I'd be fine without one of them. Does anyone else have this same or similar problem? I'd really like to hear what you guys have to say about this (and thank you). If you have any questions, feel free to ask me! Keep in mind most of this is just my thoughts in general. I would like help in understanding this side of myself.

[NickyTannock]

Welcome to AVEN!

 

I haven't experienced the same problem. In my case, I don't experience any of the different forms of attraction.
I wish I could answer your questions, but because of this, I don't think I can.

 

Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's a Cloud Cake,

[chairdesklamp]

I never got that welcome... 

 

Anyway, I definitely experience some form of romantic attraction. I actually knew a guy who possessed the one trait that will make me fall in love--he expressed it by buying panhandlers lunch and enforcing respect of my gender identity when I didn't pass so well--he was cis, so standing up for people worse off than him, not just his own demograph, but he was my boss, we got along like brothers (incl him teasing me but not meanly), and he was straight and happily married, so I never even really thought about this until reading what you said. I wanted to be his subordinate for the rest of my working life, and it was sad to me we couldn't also just be friends (fraternisation rules), because I really wanted to, but I never felt that way about him. Maybe if he was gay and single, and there hadn't been the brotherly stuff there, I would've. But that's a lot to change. Our relationship just wasn't like that. 

 

Could that be a factor? That your relationship just isn't conducive to that, so those feelings never developed for lack of suggestion?