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Tinned Ravioli

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Tinned Ravioli

I'm truly surprised to find myself posting this.  I owe it to Lent.

 

I'm a divorced Catholic, which bars me from repartnering, at least in any way that involves sex.  I've been in this position for 8 years or so.  On paper this is a hardship, but in reality I haven't found it much of a struggle: basically, nothing that pornography and a few minutes of "me time" couldn't fix, if you catch my drift.  But, for me this is a profoundly immoral act, and I always felt ashamed about it.  So, on Ash Wednesday I decided to dig my heels in and give it up for the Lenten season.

 

Giving up this particular form of sexual activity was a hardship for perhaps a few days.  After that, I came to see how much of that sort of thing was driven less by desire and more by (a) a wish for a little feel-good time and (b) boredom, at least for me.  Then a couple of weeks ago I began to ponder things that I would rather do than have sex.  I was a little surprised to find that "eat a couple of cans of cold tinned ravioli" was up there (I happen to like tinned ravioli!).  So was "read the latest issue of Spectator".  So was "have a nice pint of beer"

 

Then I realised: there's very little I could think of that wasn't preferable to sex, short of (say) being in a nasty accident.  I could only think of a few times when I'd ever desired sex: even when I was courting or married, my ex had initiated love-making about 70% of the time.  Looking back, sex mostly felt like a damned nuisance ("really?  Do I have to?").  And then I found myself thinking "gee whiz ... I couldn't be asexual could I?  I always thought I was straight!"

 

Which brings me here, learning more about it.  I'm perhaps luckier than many here: for me the stakes are very very low.  If I am indeed asexual, then it's interesting in the same way that it's interesting to know that one has A+ blood or an INFJ personality type.  It certainly would explain a few things in my life that otherwise didn't make a lot of sense (being a virgin until age 27, for instance, or realising someone is beautiful without wanting to do anything much about it).  Nothing else in my life changes, because my faith forbids me to go to bed with anyone anyway.

 

Anyway, here I am, and I'm looking forward to learning more about this unsuspected side of my identity

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CustardCream

Hello and welcome. Cake? 🍰🍰🍰

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Pandalin

Hi and welcome! 🍰

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MichaelTannock

Welcome to AVEN!

 

In my case, I've never had sex, and I'm now 33.
Though I'm an Atheist, so I don't have a faith forbidding me from having sex, I just never desired it.

 

Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, and here's a Tinned Ravioli Cake,

da2vrgbktdqlhjixljkd.jpg

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Lichley

Welcome! Well, I can’t beat the cake above, but I’ll give you cake anyways :P 

pancakecake.png

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Tinned Ravioli

@MichaelTannock What a cake, indeed! Thank you!

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