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Just discovered my "problem"!


bewildered1

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bewildered1

Hello, I am 50 years old and have always felt like I was broken.  I was sexually abused by my uncle from the time I was 8 until I was 13 and I just always believed that my problem with sex had something to do with that.  The only thing was, it didn't add up.  I wasn't traumatized about sex...I just wasn't interested.  I am currently on my 4th marriage (guess what broke up the other 3!) and this issue about sex was beginning to cause the same old problems in this marriage of 7 years.  I finally had a melt down and told my husband I was tired of beating myself up for my lack of libido.  I was ready to end this relationship right there on the spot.  Then I started thinking about this "term" I had heard used recently and decided to look it up.  "What is Asexual?"  All of a sudden, there I was in black and white.  How did I go 50 years without anyone suggesting this?  I have been to countless shrinks, I even went to Neurofeedback sessions hoping it would fix me.  So here I am on my fourth marriage with 4 grown children wondering how to explain this to my Latin husband.  I know I'm long-winded, maybe it's just the excitement of not feeling broken and alone anymore, but I am really glad I found this forum. Thanks for reading.

 

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Welcome and congrats! I experienced something similar. Always thought my lack of interest was due to past trauma. I'd never heard of asexual as an orientation, so of course I thought there was something wrong with me. Tried all manner of therapy and alternative healing methods. It wasn't until I saw the A/Sexual documentary about David Jay that I started to realize the truth.

 

Anyway, very glad you've found your way here! Better late than never 😀

 

Also, it's a tradition here to welcome newcomers with cake, so here ya go... YJJRZi2.jpg

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Very much my story - I worked out what it was 2 years ago and I am nearly 51 now!!

been with hubby for 30 years now (that’s a lot of compliance) and he’s finding it very hard to accept now the truth is out.  Welcome to Aven- it helps to have a circle of support x

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Flowerpotted

Only just worked it out for myself too.  It’s so liberating to know this is actually my normal.  Unlike you, I’m no longer married though. Much happier alone. 

 

 

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