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rebellious hellion

Black Ring for Asexuality- Aces/ace-spectrum people only please.

Black Ring Age + Usage Demographic  

289 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you wear a black/gray ring to symbolize your asexuality, or your location on the ace-spectrum?

    • Yes, I am ace/on the ace-spectrum and I wear a black ring
      111
    • Yes, I am on the ace-spectrum and wear a black/gray ring
      3
    • I am ace/ace-spectrum, and do not currently wear a ring but want one
      118
    • I am ace/ace-spectrum and I do not want to wear one
      57
  2. 2. If you do not currently wear a ring, why?

    • I do not want to out myself as I am not out to anyone/most people
      30
    • I do not want to be recognized and ostracized for being ace/ace-spectrum
      14
    • I do not think it is necessary for strangers to know my sexuality
      34
    • I want one, but I have not found a ring yet/i am in-between rings due to loss or breakage
      89
    • I do not think anyone would recognize the ring's meaning
      35
    • I don't like/wear jewelry
      65
    • Other: Please explain below
      11
    • I do wear a ring
      114
  3. 3. If you do wear a black/gray ring, why?

    • In case I come across another ace/ace-spectrum person that recognizes it
      120
    • To be visible to the entire lgbtqia+ community
      59
    • I had before realizing it is linked with asexuality
      2
    • To make ace-exclusionists Big Mad
      15
    • I like jewelry
      35
    • Other
      49
    • I do not wear a ring
      149
  4. 4. If you don't wear a ring, how old are you?

    • Under 15
      19
    • 16-20
      69
    • 21-25
      32
    • 26-30
      23
    • 31-35
      13
    • 36-40
      6
    • 41-45
      3
    • 46-50
      4
    • 51-55
      1
    • 56-60
      0
    • 61-65
      1
    • 66-70
      0
    • Over 70
      0
    • I do wear a ring
      118
  5. 5. If you do wear a black/gray ring, how old are you?

    • Under 15
      10
    • 16-20
      43
    • 21-25
      27
    • 26-30
      19
    • 31-35
      6
    • 36-40
      5
    • 41-45
      2
    • 46-50
      6
    • 51-55
      1
    • 56-60
      0
    • 61-65
      2
    • 66-70
      0
    • Over 70
      0
    • I don't wear a ring
      168
  6. 6. If you don't currently wear a ring, but did in the past, did anyone ever recognize it?

    • Yes, and the all responses were positive
      2
    • Yes, and most responses were positive
      0
    • Yes, and responses were evenly positive and negative or neutral
      0
    • Yes, and most responses were negative
      0
    • Yes, and all responses were negative
      0
    • No one ever noticed the ring for what it was
      18
    • I have never worn a ring
      154
    • I currently wear a ring
      110
    • Other: Please describe below
      5
  7. 7. If you currently do wear a ring, has anyone ever recognized it?

    • Yes, and the all responses have been positive
      21
    • Yes, and most responses have been positive
      2
    • Yes, and responses have been equally positive and negative, or neutral
      1
    • Yes, and most responses have been negative
      0
    • Yes, and all responses have been negative
      0
    • No one has yet recognized my ring for what it is
      95
    • I have never worn a ring
      157
    • Other: Please explain below
      13


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rebellious hellion

I have seen some posts going around that claim that younger ace people do not know about the black ring thing, and that it is in-part due to exclusionary people in the lgbtqia+ community causing aces to hide their orientation for fear of being ridiculed.

 

Not really sure if I believe that, but it made me curious, so here. I also searched, but the most recent poll is from last year, and it did not cover age range at all.

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Usernamethe2nd

The other reason I wear it is to symbolize my "standing apartness" or maybe an "uprightness", (to look forward) not in a bad or arrogant sort of way, but to remind myself to be a better person. "Become who you are!" -Nietzsche

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Demi Dad

I wear my ring for me mostly and to make the statement i am proud of who i am and to remind myself i am not alone or the only one (with this ring or without it, i have a many family members) be proud

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Ace of Mind
5 minutes ago, Demi Dad said:

I wear my ring for me mostly and to make the statement i am proud of who i am and to remind myself i am not alone or the only one (with this ring or without it, i have a many family members) be proud

This! Definitely this. Would have maybe liked to see an option that reflected the sentiment of "I wear the ring for myself as a reminder/connection to the community that I know is out there, even if I haven't come across anyone in person yet." 
In 3 years of wearing, nobody has noticed my ring, but that was never really the point. 


(Guilty secret: Regardless, I still have developed a semi-conscious habit of scanning of the right middle fingers of every human I see)  

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RoseGoesToYale

I chose other for the last one because I've never had a non-ace person recognize the ring. I've had other aces recognize it, and you can guess what the reaction was there. :lol:

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Norellia

I have a ring picked out and will probably order it within the next couple of days. I would say I mostly want to get it for myself. 

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Marian the Herbalist

For the last question I had to pick "I have never worn a ring" even though I have, I just stopped doing it.

 

Anyway, I used to wear a black ring for a few years, I still have it somewhere. I stopped wearing it for a few reasons, 1. I don't really care about others knowing what I am, 2. I'm not a fan of black in general, even though the ring I had was very reflective and with that looked more metallic than pure plack, it just wasn't something that I enjoyed wearing.

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AmorphousBlob

I left my last one in a public bathroom during a road trip... whoops. New one should be here in a few days though 😁

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Flute16

Mine had the word "Jesus" on it, because my family is obsessively Christian.

I stopped wearing it after a few weeks. Felt kind of awkward because of the inscription. I'd like to get a more inscriptionless ace ring, if I can find one.

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Crazy Cat Lady

I answered that I don't wear one, but want to, but I'm unsure. It was only a few days ago I was toying with the idea of one. I'm really still undecided. The reason I was thinking of it is because I'm not out to anyone, but might be ok if another ace recognized it. I honestly wouldn't really expect anyone who isn't to know what it meant. Although, in all honesty, I don't really wear jewelry, anyway, so it's probably unlikely that I will.

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iyote
3 hours ago, nightingale harper said:

I have seen some posts going around that claim that younger ace people do not know about the black ring thing, and that it is in-part due to exclusionary people in the lgbtqia+ community causing aces to hide their orientation for fear of being ridiculed.

 

Those are some interesting age results.  Seems you were right.  

 

Personally, I'm 17 & I don't wear/want to wear the ring because I dislike jewelry.  But I do really like the concept, and I do know an ace person my age who wears one!  Honestly, I'd love to wear something like a shirt or a pin that has some sort of ace symbolism on it, as a subtle way of coming out.  

 
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Kimchi Peanut

Just curious - what does okay to vote mean?

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Pandark

"Has anyone ever recognized your ring?"

I couldn't possibly tell. I, for one, am not going to walk up to everyone wearing one. Maybe give them a wink/friendly nod. Some aces may still be in the closet, some non-aces may recognize it and not comment on it. It's not as if I'm wearing it as a conversation starter. It's more to inspire confidence/expell feelings of solitude.

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rebellious hellion
12 hours ago, disGraceful said:

Just curious - what does okay to vote mean?

I accidentally posted the poll before i finished, so i put "please do not vote yet" and then changed it as soon as i was done

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GoldenAllie

I personally have wanted a ring since I understood what it was. It made me feel like there's something I can do. There's so much people can wear that's "HEY IM GAY" and I want to be able to visually say "hey I'm not heteronomative" I've worn some bi pride stuff in the past when I didn;t know about asexuality and just identified Bisexual. Now I want to wear it, and honestly, I'd want people to ask questions about why I wear it. Like, Im very open person about it and I encourage people to see that Aces aren't a rare bird that's off it's rocker so much as a valid identity of varying folks. 

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Jinkx

I would like to wear a black ring, seeing as I love simplistic jewelry and a tungsten ring or something like that sounds cool. The only issue is that rings are generally only comfortable on my left ring finger. 😅 Maybe I'll order one soon.

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Sithgroundhog

I don't have a black ring. I would want it to be perfect so am unsure about ordering one online, and I'm not sure if I would wear it much since I don't wear jewelry unless I'm dressing up. 

 

If I wore one, it would mostly be me wanting to feel connected to the community outside of the Internet. Like I'm not alone when I get off AVEN. I could care less if people recognized it.

 

My small way of being out is wearing my Ace Flag pin on my purse. It's small and not very noticable, but it's there. Used to wear it on my workhat and only got asked what it meant by four people I think in the year or so it was on there. 

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Anthracite_Impreza

Never wear jewellry, also don't see much point broadcasting my aceness.

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Comforting Rain

I keep losing mine. :( I wear it for me, not to be recognized. I understand what it means and I feel good wearing it. That's all that matters.

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Lunala

I love wearing my ring. Nobody around me know what it means... yet... but i like to just in case I run into someone who does. :)

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Skycaptain

I do wear a ring, outside of the Ace community only one person has asked why I wear a ring, now. 

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Crazy Cat Lady

Interesting. I've never noticed anyone wearing one until today. Probably I just haven't noticed. Whether or not it meant anything, I don't know. I didn't ask.

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Akmenos

I really want to wear a black ring, but my sister knows about the asexual ring and I don't want to come out to her yet. I used to wear one when my sister wasn't around, but it was a bit big on me so I stopped. I tried to wear it again the other day, but it's even bigger on me now! I guess my finger shrunk...o-o

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S---y

I had just made myself a ring, but just shortly after finishing it I went and broke it... it's on my schedule to fix it tomorrow.

 

It was made out of a black electrical jumper wire and was bejewelled with fragments cut from a motherboard on one side and with a 330 ohm resistor on the other. I could flip it around either way depending on which look I was in the mood for. But, the motherboard bit broke off and I can't find it.

 

I wear it primarily as a symbol to myself. It reminds me that I have learned who I am with regards specifically to the dynamic of love vs purpose. Some members of the species serve the biological role of creating and raising a family. Others serve the role of supporting their civilisation, working for the prosperity, technological progress, and other ingredients of success which the reproducers require to survive and live an enriching life. Of course, many members of the species mix both roles, maybe doing a little of both, or maybe doing one first and the other later. On the one hand, my ring is a reminder of my choice not to get myself mixed up in relationships which are unnecessary for me at this time, and on the other hand, it's a reminder of my choice to instead spend that energy focusing on my work. My ring is a symbol that I have chosen for this time to commit to be a creature of purpose, not love

 

It also means that next time someone is trying to pressure me into dating them, I can hold up the ring and point to it, and they'll know I'm serious about being single. A ring is a symbol of commitment after all.

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S---y
On 3/21/2019 at 4:40 PM, Jinkx said:

The only issue is that rings are generally only comfortable on my left ring finger.

Hey, you can be married to yourself! That's sorta what I think of my ring as. Married to myself, my life, and my own purpose in the world.

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Nowhere Girl

I don't wear an ace ring for a very specific reason. I suffer from allergy, usually have some small scratches and wounds on my hands - and anyway, to be honest, it just made me used to wearing gloves, I feel uncomfortable if I'm outdoors without gloves. Of good-quality thin cotton gloves, black are easiest to get. You see the problem: a ring on any glove is not particularly comfortable, a black ring on a black glove would be simply invisible...

I absolutely support being out as asexual, I'm proud of accepting my orientation and would never want to hide it... but the ring just won't work for the reasons above. However, I feel comfortable wearing other kinds of asexual decorations, even if I only have two pieces.

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nineGardens

Do not wear ring.

Because

A) Only just heard they exist.

B) do not wear rings, find them uncomfortable and fear they will tear my fingers off.

C) Am still figuring out this whole thing, and wouldn't want to send a signal that then turned out to be false.

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Hannah Rae

I love my ring. It generally never comes off. The few times I've forgotten it, I've felt weird all day. To me, it not only represents part of me but also represents me respecting that part of myself and not trying to hide it. I do wear it hoping another ace will recognize it, but so far no one has at all. There have been a few people I've met that I actually expected to recognize it; if they noticed it, I'll never know. 

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TheCatBehind

I always entertained the idea of wearing jewellery, and the black ace ring gave me the final push to start doing so haha~

 

I also wear my ring to say f you to the fact that men are apparently forbidden to wear jewellery except for very specific reasons and such. But honestly I just like it.

 

In February a person recognised the ring and it was a really nice! It was a Sociological research event about sexuality, sexual behaviours and gender, so figures as much that it wasn't a negative response haha. Though I was surprised only one person recognised it, but only the one person that came up to me seemed to know about asexuality, so

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uniQChick
On 3/20/2019 at 10:32 PM, Ace of Mind said:

Guilty secret: Regardless, I still have developed a semi-conscious habit of scanning of the right middle fingers of every human I see

So, is that where you suppose to wear it? :unsure:

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