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Is this a crush, squish, or something else?


Norellia

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Sorry this might belong in romantic orientations, but i'll put it here for now. 

 

So I started a new job within the last month as a hostess at a restaurant. The work is fine and the coworkers seem ok too, but I noticed that I seem more focused on a single coworker. The person works as a waiter so I have almost no interactions with them, but my attention is constantly drawn to them. I don't know most of the waiters name yet but I already know this persons name and even go so far to look up their name on the schedule to see if they are working and what sections to see if its near the host stand. I think about them even after work but the thoughts are never anything sexual or romantic in nature just me thinking what they are like or why I am more focused on them. I am more aware when the person is walking near me or when I am heading towards them. I feel like I am stalking them which makes me mostly embarrassed about the whole thing.

 

I had my first actual interaction with them today when I was in the back folding silverware for my shift. They came back to grab some of the silverware to close up cause apparently waiters need to do that and asked if they could have some. I never got any of the nervousness or "butterfly's" that people seem to talk about with crushes but noticed I did talk more openly to them. I've recognized this behavior that I have done before with other people but it usually passes after I get to know them or eventually that persons leaves my social group. I would say the thing I feel most is curiosity and really only nervousness and embarrassment with the hyper fixation I have on them.

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11 minutes ago, Norellia said:

Sorry this might belong in romantic orientations, but i'll put it here for now. 

 

So I started a new job within the last month as a hostess at a restaurant. The work is fine and the coworkers seem ok too, but I noticed that I seem more focused on a single coworker. The person works as a waiter so I have almost no interactions with them, but my attention is constantly drawn to them. I don't know most of the waiters name yet but I already know this persons name and even go so far to look up their name on the schedule to see if they are working and what sections to see if its near the host stand. I think about them even after work but the thoughts are never anything sexual or romantic in nature just me thinking what they are like or why I am more focused on them. I am more aware when the person is walking near me or when I am heading towards them. I feel like I am stalking them which makes me mostly embarrassed about the whole thing.

 

I had my first actual interaction with them today when I was in the back folding silverware for my shift. They came back to grab some of the silverware to close up cause apparently waiters need to do that and asked if they could have some. I never got any of the nervousness or "butterfly's" that people seem to talk about with crushes but noticed I did talk more openly to them. I've recognized this behavior that I have done before with other people but it usually passes after I get to know them or eventually that persons leaves my social group. I would say the thing I feel most is curiosity and really only nervousness and embarrassment with the hyper fixation I have on them.

yeah, I have similar feelings. except my feelings are more along the lines of a desire to be exclusive, which is confusing (crush or no crush? do I love love this person, or just care about them in a qpr/platonic way?

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I guess this would be a squish, since you don't have any romantic thoughts about said person. Or maybe you just find him interesting, either his looks or body language/behaviour. Sometimes we are just drawn to some people for no reason at all. Just enjoy the moment and see where it goes. Maybe things will get clearer with time.

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@lazypanda Ya back in middle school I had the same hyper-fixation on a background dancer in one of the high school musical movies. I just thought she was so pretty and I noticed whatever scenes she was in even if she didn't have any speaking lines. Just weird o-o....

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secrethamster

I've been doing that sort of thing with my squish - looking for them when I know they'll be around, trying to figure out when I'll see them next, etc. They're just the most interesting person in the room.

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