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KrysLost

Kinks, Fantasies, Fetishes, their all here for you.

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bare_trees
7 hours ago, Dreamsexual said:

I don't know that one.  Is it to do with breathing or heartbeat or something?

Yeah, it's wanting to listen to people's hearts and have your heart listened to.  Some people see it as like a dom/sub thing, kind of?  Like doms are the listeners and subs are the ones being listened to.  I've always wanted to have both myself.

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Dreamsexual
On ‎6‎/‎3‎/‎2019 at 1:11 PM, bare_trees said:

Yeah, it's wanting to listen to people's hearts and have your heart listened to.  Some people see it as like a dom/sub thing, kind of?  Like doms are the listeners and subs are the ones being listened to.  I've always wanted to have both myself.

.

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Dreamsexual

.

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KrysLost

It seems to just certain around the heartbeat, which is quite interesting actually. Not everyday you meet the local aven cardiophile. (i could never listen to heartbearts lol, they sounded too weird to me)

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humantoafault

I'm a pup, that's a kink. But it's not practiced in a sexual manner in my case, especially cuz my handler is a gay man in a relationship with another gay man. He has other non-sexual pups as well, I'm not the only one.

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KrysLost

OOo what kinds of non-sexual things do you do as a pup?

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humantoafault

I play the part of a dog, wear a collar with my pup name on it and my handler's name. I don't own a pup hood, partly cuz I live with my mom and having that around--she might not know what it is, but just not a good idea to tempt her ire. But if my handler wants me to "speak", I bark, I do what I'm told, I react to words like "ball", "walk", just act like a dog in general.

Pup play is an offshoot of BDSM pet play, but is it's own thing.

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Sir_The_Last
10 minutes ago, humantoafault said:

I play the part of a dog, wear a collar with my pup name on it and my handler's name. I don't own a pup hood, partly cuz I live with my mom and having that around--she might not know what it is, but just not a good idea to tempt her ire. But if my handler wants me to "speak", I bark, I do what I'm told, I react to words like "ball", "walk", just act like a dog in general.

Pup play is an offshoot of BDSM pet play, but is it's own thing.

That is adorable... 😀

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Squirrel Combat

I wish I had come to terms with my boot fetish sooner in life. I feel like I've wasted so much time and possible relationships not going for what I want.

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Dreamsexual
On ‎6‎/‎3‎/‎2019 at 7:18 PM, Squirrel Combat said:

I wish I had come to terms with my boot fetish sooner in life. I feel like I've wasted so much time and possible relationships not going for what I want.

.

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verymelancholic

I kinda have a gentle femdom (non-sexual) kink. Oops.

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Sir_The_Last
16 hours ago, verymelancholic said:

I kinda have a gentle femdom (non-sexual) kink. Oops.

Femdom? I've no idea what that means anymore...  Non/sexual how's that suppose to work? Sorry for the questions. 

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KrysLost

mean basically a female dominating their partner (typically a male). The styling of domming is left up to the partners involved.

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Sir_The_Last
1 minute ago, KrystalLost said:

mean basically a female dominating their partner (typically a male). The styling of domming is left up to the partners involved.

Now I see. I've had such a relationship... I was wondering how a nonsexual one would work. Since Dom is all about control over the others persons body... 

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KrysLost

There's a hell lot more to d/s than sex. It's psychological, too. So I'll leave it up to imagination. 

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Sir_The_Last
9 minutes ago, KrystalLost said:

There's a hell lot more to d/s than sex. It's psychological, too. So I'll leave it up to imagination. 

I understand all that. But to me sex is a powerful tool. I been on those site and to me it's purely sexual . The female control over the males body... I am one of those who enjoys that. But in my view the was highly sexual in nature. 

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KrysLost

same as well, but i like nonsexual stuff too

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Usernamethe2nd
On 6/4/2019 at 2:18 AM, Squirrel Combat said:

I wish I had come to terms with my boot fetish sooner in life. I feel like I've wasted so much time and possible relationships not going for what I want. 

Agreed. These are likely wise words, though I don't think I'm past my "flower of youth" yet. <insert image of Guy Sensei here>

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KrysLost

Image result for Guy Sensei

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Dreamsexual

.

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Wrentherainfalls
On 3/20/2019 at 4:03 PM, Tarento said:

So, I'm sure I'm not the only one who experiences this, but I find that as a single grey-ace who is female presenting, it's hard to actively go out in exploration of one's kinks. With the lack of a partner to play around with, and friends largely off-limits because of not wanting to put awkward or inappropriate expectations on them, in desperate times it feels like the only option you have is to take the risk of entering a community of strangers who may not be trustworthy. That can be intimidating especially when you're on your own and very aware of being seen as an easy target in what seems like a predatory scene, so sadly I don't do it as often as I'd like.

 

It's really nice that there are more and more non-sexual and ace positive BDSM and kink groups these days, but it can still feel like a big barrier.

I have much the same concerns. I'd like to explore some specific kinks but don't have anyone close to me which really an option. Some of the things I'd like to explore, with my boundaries as a grey ace person... Well reaching out to strangers seems downright dangerous - like just asking for things to go very wrong for me.

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AceMissBehaving
40 minutes ago, Wrentherainfalls said:

I have much the same concerns. I'd like to explore some specific kinks but don't have anyone close to me which really an option. Some of the things I'd like to explore, with my boundaries as a grey ace person... Well reaching out to strangers seems downright dangerous - like just asking for things to go very wrong for me.

A lot depends on what your specific kinks are. Some it’s possible to explore solo. I have a few that I don’t involve anyone else with.

 

It’s also possible to research local BDSM groups, a lot have casual munches which are like any other social meetup group, where people get together in a public setting to just hang out and chat as people. The organizers tend to be willing and able to help new people navigate the community.

 

As a female presenting person it can be a little trickier, but getting to know people and looking for red flags is pretty much the same as getting to know people in a vanilla setting.

 

Avoid anyone who tries to get you to fulfill any roll quickly, anyone who tries to push your boundaries, or tries foist their agenda onto you. Make sure there is a negotiation period, talk clearly about what you are looking for, and willing to do, and think about what you’re limits and hard limits might be, and be sure to discus those too.

 

 Making friends in the scene you can trust to let you know about any possible bad seeds, you can get, and ask for references as to the trustworthiness of people too.

 

There are public play spaces and events which are safer than meeting someone one on one in terms of having people around to monitor going’s on.

 

There are also mentor groups to help people learn more about their kinks and the safest ways to practice them.

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MoreCoffee

I'm into BDSM, mainly femdom, pet play, and age play.

 

Has anyone had luck finding a partner? Not a play partner, I mean an actual long-term, romantic partner. I'm very pessimistic I'm ever going to meet someone I'm compatible with. "Just FYI, I'm not aroused at all by normal sex acts and PIV sex is totally out of the question because of that, but I do have all these fetishes I desperately want fulfilled" is an extremely hard sell, pretty much impossible if the other person isn't really into BDSM too. I've tried the IRL BDSM community, but I don't fit in at all. Most people in it make a strong effort to be counter-culture, and meanwhile I do not want to be counter-culture at all. So that's a no-go.

 

It's a shame asexual fetishists are so rare. I've never even met one IRL. Hell, I've never met anyone who's met one.

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KrysLost

HELLO I EXIST

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bare_trees
On 6/20/2019 at 11:39 AM, MoreCoffee said:

 

Has anyone had luck finding a partner? Not a play partner, I mean an actual long-term, romantic partner.

Yes and no in my case.  I'm in a long-term relationship and we're in love, but my fetish doesn't play into the relationship as much as I'd like.  I never really thought I would find another cardiophile, so I'm ok with that, but it's a little bittersweet at the same time.  I know that he will never feel the exact same way about it that I do, because it just isn't his thing.  If it's any consolation, though, BDSM seems much more common, and a couple of my friends who are into it have told me that they've met people in the community who aren't into PiV sex and prefer to express their sensuality/sexuality in other ways instead.

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KrysLost

Im basically incapable of P.I.V because i have MRKH and only have about 1-2 inchs of vaginal canal. It's still however, not sensitive. I don't feel anything and wouldn't want to. Even the idea of being fingered makes me freak out a little. Yet literally every other sex act is fine with me?? (especially making the other person scream ehehe) 

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RakshaTheCat

Blood, pointy things (needles), light cuts (more like scratches, I want them to heal fast). Some pain to go with it. My last play was simple drawing of a kitty I scratched on my thigh (click if brave enough to see), making it gave me so many warm feelings... I love doing these things to myself, they actually made me appreciate my body. Guess I kinda fell in love with my body because of that, I can do so many cool things to it and it reacts in cute way with pain and blood... 😺

I found other people completely useless for, hmm, emotional side of kinks though. At first I naively thought kinks might be good for building intimacy and trust, but then I looked into local scene, went to a munch and, uhh, everyone seems to be looking for emotionless kink vending machines (nothing bad with that of course, it's just not my thing at all)... So, yeah, guess I have to keep being hermit and just explore things on my own 😸

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pma01

@krystal lost. Idea of femdom turns me on a bit, I idea of a woman dominating me is intriguing.

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oldgeeza

@AceMissBehavingI have worked the doors on some fetish events, I have found that people that attend these events tend to be very trustworthy, I guess in part because it's something they keep apart from their everyday vanilla lifestyles, I've seen politicians, teachers, doctors etc, attending these events, parents of friends, even friends, friends of friends, what goes on at these events remains at these events, the first time I was asked to help out I was quite shocked, but these events happen around 10 times a year and I often help out, I admit, some things "fascinate" me, I do wonder what makes people want to do some of the things they do, but then, we're all individual, life would be boring if we just went about the more mundane things in life without a little bit of adventure in life, I'm not saying I wouldn't try certain things in life, never say never, but some things I've seen are totally beyond me, some are very painful, as a person who doesn't like to be restrained or confined in small spaces, seeing someone tied up or confined in some way literally takes my breath away, if it happened to me, I'd probably pass out or have a heart attack. I see nothing wrong with fetishes though, they're probably quite a healthy way of escapeism from everyday life which can't be all bad.

 

@pma01, I sort of had an experience, not so much of being dominated by a woman, but when I was still at school, there was a girl who would always smack my backside whenever she saw me, more often than not I'd feel the sharp sting of her hand across my backside before I saw her, she always said that she wanted to "punish" me for real, she thought my backside was perfectly formed for spanking, at the time I was 15, she was 17, at the time I never thought anything of it, but, thinking back on it many years later, I wonder what it did for her

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AceMissBehaving
2 hours ago, oldgeeza said:

@AceMissBehavingI have worked the doors on some fetish events, I have found that people that attend these events tend to be very trustworthy, I guess in part because it's something they keep apart from their everyday vanilla lifestyles, I've seen politicians, teachers, doctors etc,

I feel generally safer at these kinds of spaces because there is some amount of vetting going on, but that’s not sadly always a sign that everyone there is someone you can trust. While for the most part any time I’ve been in a kink space people have been especially respectful and well behaved, I do know of others who have had very negative experiences, and of some problematic people who through connections, politics, or just by being careful have managed to find safe haven in what should be a safe space. There is also the good person but inexperienced factor to weigh up too. Not saying anyone should go in paranoid, but that it’s still always wise to be careful

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