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Acebooklove

any ideas?

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Acebooklove

Hi! So for the past few weeks, I´ve been questioning my romantic orientation so far I know I liked two girls, which led me to believe i was homo or bi romantic, but:

1) I told a girl I liked her and she said no. I thought I would feel horrible after this, but at the end, I just mourned for like 10 minutes and kept on, saw her next day as if nothing happened. I mean, I was sad, nut not particularly heartbroken. 

2) I see all my friends in relationships, I sometimes feel like I would enjoy it. See some days I´m like: Hell yeah, and other days I´m like: Nope, no thanks. 

3) I really enjoy the thought of cuddling and kissing, it´s not something i´m bothered with.

4) But (there ´s always a but lol) I hate it when people confess their feelings to me or are overly romantic, it´s just UGH, somewhat gross. 

So, I´m in a bit of a confusion, any ideas?

Thanks

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Denoscar

1. That sounds like infatuation to me. It's not the same as love, but related to it. It happens.
2. I'm the same way to be honest. Well, more so in the past than now. It might be your mind trying to deal with desiring something it can't have yet.
3. I see no problem here.
4. I haven't had this happen to me, but I can imagine I'd feel the same way. There are plenty of things similar to this that I really don't like from people. I don't think it invalids you at all. It's just your preference.

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Acebooklove
7 minutes ago, Denoscar said:

1. That sounds like infatuation to me. It's not the same as love, but related to it. It happens.
2. I'm the same way to be honest. Well, more so in the past than now. It might be your mind trying to deal with desiring something it can't have yet.
3. I see no problem here.
4. I haven't had this happen to me, but I can imagine I'd feel the same way. There are plenty of things similar to this that I really don't like from people. I don't think it invalids you at all. It's just your preference.

I know, but for instance, if it wasn´t a "crush" or "squish" as aces call it, what is happening?

 

I mean, am I still homo/bi romantic or else? I know I´m not aro, at all, or panromantic, but other than that well... 

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Denoscar
1 minute ago, Acebooklove said:

I know, but for instance, if it wasn´t a "crush" or "squish" as aces call it, what is happening?

 

I mean, am I still homo/bi romantic or else? I know I´m not aro, at all, or panromantic, but other than that well... 

It would be a crush. Crushes are not the same as being in love, exactly, but they can lead to it.

You are whatever you feel your attractions lead you to.

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kiaroskuro

As for points 2 and 4, it sounds as if you could be grayromantic. Maybe demi- and/or lithromantic, if you're familiar with those terms (there's lots of information on AVEN and elsewhere).

But do you really need a name for your 'variant' of homo- or biromantic? Just take your time to figure it all out. Maybe you won't be able to, like me. But I don't mind it that much, and I try to be patient with myself. 🙂

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Acebooklove
On 3/23/2019 at 5:03 PM, kiaroskuro said:

As for points 2 and 4, it sounds as if you could be grayromantic. Maybe demi- and/or lithromantic, if you're familiar with those terms (there's lots of information on AVEN and elsewhere).

But do you really need a name for your 'variant' of homo- or biromantic? Just take your time to figure it all out. Maybe you won't be able to, like me. But I don't mind it that much, and I try to be patient with myself. 🙂

Some yes, I am. I actually just stumbled upon lithromantic today!

I mean, I know i probably shouldn´t be that desperate but this whole "hey you don´t feel attracted to anyone sexually and probably not romantically either" has taken me aback. It sounds stupid i guess, but I´m used to having things figured out. School, career, work, things I have to do, taking care of my pets, choosing things. So not knowing something about myself is really frustrating I guess. 

Thank you so much though! 

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