I’m confused and would really appreciate any help

[Fruity]

Okay so I’m not really sure I’m I’m experiencing disphoria because it’s not all the time. I seem to go through phases where I hate my breasts, butt, and curves and then another where I try to show them off. And I’m not sure what I feel to be disphoria is even disphoria. Basically I will look at myself and try to push my breasts down or find some way to make my chest flatter or even when I’m not looking at them I can just feel them sitting there. Like it’s all I think about. I also tend to think about cutting all my hair off. But that feeling isn’t all the time because like I said before, I go  through feminine and masculine phases.  Also, I don’t think I’m trans or NB because I still like my female pronouns. I guess it’s what I’m used to. However, I don’t like my feminine name. Most of the time it doesn’t bother be but I wish I had something a bit more neutral. 

I’m only 15 too so this could just be some weird teenage phase thing that’ll be over in a couple years. Anyway, thanks for taking time to read this and I’d more that appreciate any advice or similar stories. 

Have a great day!

[Guest]

*edited

[General]

@Fruity I'm a masculine afab nonbinary and I still use female pronouns.  Pronoun usage does not determine gender.  In my case I know I experience dysphoria because I feel the incongruence between my body and my brain.  Also, my gender never fluctuates.  It is very possible that you may be under the nonbinary umbrella, perhaps of the gender fluid variety.  What's important is that you pay close attention to how you feel.  Feelings come first, labels are secondary.  You will find yourself, it just requires some patience, but you will get there. 👍

[Celyn: The Lutening]

I don't think 15 is too young at all. With gender stuff, people realise at all different ages.

So I wouldn't doubt your feelings, but also I wouldn't worry about them too much. As @AceOfHearts_85 said, present according to how you feel and don't sweat the labels.

(Though genderfluid does sound accurate, you'd need to determine that it is your internal sense of gender that's changing and not just how you want to look aesthetically)

 

Feel free to PM me, you're exactly where I was at your age

[ScarletPrincess2004]

Hi! 

I'm 15 too and I'm going through a very similar thing.

Today, I had the sudden urge to cut my hair, hide my breasts and curves and wear very androgynous clothes. 

Yesterday, I wore makeup, a skirt and my long hair down all day and I was happy and content like that.

I've decided, just like my sexual and romantic orientations, my gender fluctuates and changes, so I've recently decided to use the term genderflux, which seems to work for me.

 

You might like to explore some terms under the genderfluid spectrum, like genderflux, genderqueer or even just genderfluid, if you are looking for a label that fits you, but of course you don't have to use one of these, or even one at all! 

I found this link quite useful for finding out about different identities and terms if you want to check it out:

https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/159465-gender-definitions-masterlist-forum-ettiquette-and-faq/

 

Good luck with whatever you do and be happy with yourself! That's always the most important thing!

[Starbogen]

Just do what you feel like and what makes you comfortable. If you don't think you're trans or nonbinary and are comfortable with female pronouns then great, no need to change anything there. If you want to not express yourself and present so femininely sometimes then maybe get a good sportsbra to flatten your chest and wear shirts that are thicker and more covered up. As for your name you could try coming up with a more neutral sounding nickname.