Asexuality Poem

[disaster-ace]

I had a crush

I was maybe 12
on my best friend

I wanted to hold her hand

and see her smile

but didn't people usually want more

 

And when i got a bit older
i couldn't help but notice

what all the boys looked at

what all the boys wanted

the one thing i didn't

 

and when i got a girlfriend, 

i was terrified 

of what she might want

or if she knew me too well

what she might find

 

we split up

i was sad

but relived

because i couldn't give her

a certain part of me

 

no she never asked

so i never told

i didn't know what i was

i thought maybe i'd just lost hold

on the emotions

like love

and wants 

like lust

i thought maybe i was broken

and at the time i had no one to trust

 

so google was my best friend

when i wanted to know who i was

because this bothered me to no end

 

i saw why i never wanted what the others did

i didn't want sex

and why was always scared when i fell in love

of what people want from me

why i never liked boys the way my mama said i should

and never felt the urge to "smash"

like my heath teacher said i would

 

I'm different

not broken

I'm have feelings

I'm not a robot 

and I can fall in love

even if it takes a bit longer

and is a bit harder