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Confusion about romantic relationship


Meng

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Hello.Me again:-) Hope that I do not bother.

I am wondering whether I am aromatic or not . When I was in middle school and high school,I dated with two girls and one boy. All of my friends were dating with others and in romantic relationship.I was envious of my friends as they showed very satisfied with their boyfriends or girlfriends. I tried to perform like them,but in fact I did not feel like falling in love with any one of my exes,and never experienced desire to be physical with them.I did kiss them,only to feel nothing during kissing;I was willing to be kissed at that time only because all the people believe that a kiss means love and care,but I never kissed them on my own initiative.Afterwards,I had a crush on a former tutor of an extracurricular course,because he helped me a lot and I wanted to be cared by him,but I just forgot him after I left that course.It seemed to be just an illusion,a phenomenon of transference between tutor and teenager. I was very excited in the beginning of the crush,as I thought that I became normal as others,but it finally turned out not that way…Through these relationships and the crush,I was only feeling promoted by desire for being protected and cared but not being attracted by their personalities or appearances.
I have had a very close and intimate friend,or a queer platonic relationship for nearly four years.I admire her and find that we have a lot in common.Her ideas are very creative and inspiring,and she completely understands me and always acts as a guide for me.I do want to be a very special and unique partner for her,with considering her as a soulmate for me as well,and maybe live together in the future if there would be an opportunity.
I really enjoy cradling and hugging,but kiss obviously does not work for me.I have always defined myself as biromantic,but after I have learnt that I am actually asexual,I am confused and curious.Thanks a lot for your reading and reply.

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I've moved this thread from 'Questions about Asexuality' to 'Romantic and Aromantic Orientations'.

 

Michael Tannock,

Open Mic moderator and Questions about Asexuality Co-moderator.

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It sounds like it might be aromantic, but it's really your call. I find romantic attraction a bit confusing too, so I cant give much advice. 

 

Just do whatever makes you happy. If it's with your QPR,  then keep doing it.

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2 hours ago, CajunAce said:

It sounds like it might be aromantic, but it's really your call. I find romantic attraction a bit confusing too, so I cant give much advice. 

 

Just do whatever makes you happy. If it's with your QPR,  then keep doing it.

Thanks for your reply:D

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abandoned-account

“Romance” is a funny term because it seems to have vastly varying definitions for different people. 

and I wouldn’t feel so concerned with being normal. Tis’ but an illusion.

Just do what makes you feel happy and comfortable.

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32 minutes ago, Vee. said:

“Romance” is a funny term because it seems to have vastly varying definitions for different people. 

and I wouldn’t feel so concerned with being normal. Tis’ but an illusion.

Just do what makes you feel happy and comfortable.

Thank you.I feel better:-)

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