Candreva Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 Hi, I am new to this forum and generally to any sort of LGBTIA discussion. I was not really close to my family or friends in a way that would facilitate discussion of things like this. I thought I was broken for a long time due to not having sexual feelings towards others. When I tried to talk to my mother about it she told me I was probably just deeply repressed due to violence I suffered when I was young. Could this be the case? Is it common for asexuality to be something that goes away in time? To give background I am 19 and I have never felt romantic attraction to another person. I feel like I have loved other people, cared for, admired, and been devoted to them as a person. But I have never wanted another person to touch me in a sexual way, I struggle with such things as hugs as well. Is this a common thing? I have never met anyone else like this. The only person I talked to about it, my mother, told me several years ago that I would grow out of it. This has not been the case. I'm afraid I will never be able to form a meaningful relationship with another person. I feel like I can not flirt or act interested in another person if I liked them as a person because I would be tricking them. Has anyone navigated this challenge? Does anyone have any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Denoscar Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 Hello, welcome!! You will have our support here. You could use Aromantic, Asexual, or anything that describes your feelings as you see fit. As long as the description matches, right? It all boils down to what you want. You have to ask yourself this and that will give you the answer you're looking for. It's not your fault if someone takes your actions the wrong way, it's just a misunderstanding. For new people, we share cake, so here you go: Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 @Candreva Welcome to AVEN! I don't know how common it is for people to develop Sexual Attraction later, sorry. Your feelings could change, but you could be an Aromantic Asexual. Asexuality is a lack of Sexual Attraction, which we define as leading to the desire to have sex with someone. But there are other types of attraction besides Sexual Attraction. There's Romantic Attraction, which we define as leading to the desire to have a romantic relationship with someone. There's Sensual Attraction, which we define as leading to the desire to have intimate non-sexual physical contact with someone, like kissing or cuddling. There's Aesthetic Attraction, which we define as leading to the desire to appreciate someone's aesthetic beauty. There's Platonic Attraction, which we define as leading to the desire to have a deep friendship with someone. And more. In my case, I experience none of the above, have never had or desired either sex or a relationship, and I've never come out to my family. But have you thought about dating other Asexuals? There are Asexual dating sites like this one, https://www.asexualcupid.com/ Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake, Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 Hello and welcome. Have some cake! Link to post Share on other sites
Lichley Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 Welcome! You might be interested in QPRs then (Queer Platonic Relationships), where it isn’t a romantic or sexual relationship but an emotional one between two people platonically. Link to post Share on other sites
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