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Snao Cone

I'm in my asexual prime

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Snao Cone

So, we see it in media, entertainment, news articles, etc - women reach their sexual prime at a later age than men. Men get their horniest in their late teens, according to this oft cited bit of knowledge (that is probably not scientifically sound), while women reach their sexual prime at 35.

 

Well, I'm 35, and I can solidly say that this does not apply to me. But my 30s so far has brought immense improvement in my life in the other direction. The personal growth in this decade of my life has made me more sure of myself, comfortable in who I am, and involved in the community - all as an asexual person.

 

I don't know what it feels like to be a woman in her sexual prime, so I don't know if this is at all related or comparable to what that's like. But I would not be the least bit surprised if the peak of a woman's sexuality has something to do with self-discovery and the wisdom acquired that empowers us to drop the worries of meeting expectations. Discovering asexuality was a pivotal moment in putting more meaning into my life and assigning the right values to things so I could focus on what's more important.

 

So, have other people come across things like this, when at one point in your life you began to feel more whole about your asexuality?

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Sage Raven Domino

Idk if it applies to those whose sexual and romantic orientations are misaligned, but aro aces surely get happier once they get comfortable living on their own (or in a well-defined platonic relationship) instead of succumbing to the peer pressure that was urging them to get a romantic partner through the rather unstructured processes of dating and infatuation :P

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daveb
1 hour ago, Snao Cone said:

So, have other people come across things like this, when at one point in your life you began to feel more whole about your asexuality?

I guess I reached my asexual prime in my early 50s. :D

And the prime of my life, right now. :D 

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Guest Jetsun Milarepa

Yes. I'm with you on that @Snao Cone.

Around the same age as you are now, I just breathed a sigh of relief and got on with my priorities.

Best thing I ever did.

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Nick2

I dive a Prime.  Does that count?

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Raire

I think I had a free trial of Sexual Prime, but didn't renew my subscription. 

 

But to be serious, I did feel that the 'pressure' was off for me when I reached my 30th birthday - kind of a "Well, I've survived this long without relationships. Roll on the next few decades". That being said, I don't think I'm any more comfortable / uncomfortable with my asexuality now than I was then. 

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Spotastic

The whole sexual peak at 35 for women and 18 for men was from a study done in the 50's or so where people were interviewed about how sexually active they were. The thing is, in that time, women were more likely to be more conservative with their responses, and men would be likely to say they were having sex with many women early on when they weren't. It's a ridiculous skewing of statistics that has no basis on reality.

 

As far as becoming more comfortable within my own asexuality, that happened a couple years ago when I finally figured out where I fit on the sexuality spectrum. The fact that my wife and I have in-depth conversations about these things helps, as well.

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