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Trying to figure out my sexuality/romantic orientation this time


Ekru?

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So uhhHHHhh HI I've identified as bisexual for a while and I may still be, but I'm questioning my romantic orientation? I might be polyromantic?? For those who don't know, polyromantic is feeling romantic attraction to more than 2 genders, but not ALL genders like pan or omni. I've been asking myself questions like "Would I date an agender person? Would I date a gender-fluid person?" etc., but when it comes to sexual attraction I'm confused. I'm quoisexual, meaning that I have a hard time distinguishing sexual attraction from other types of attraction, have a hard time understanding sexual attraction as a concept/feeling, and don't know if I feel sexual attraction. So, it's hard to figure out my sexuality when I can't even understand sexual attraction. I ask myself the same kind of questions that I mentioned before, like "Could I see myself having sex with a girl? With a guy? With an nb?" But I still don't know?? I could really use some help thanks

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Hiii

What do you mean you don't know if you feel sexual attraction ?

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10 minutes ago, Seyla said:

Hiii

What do you mean you don't know if you feel sexual attraction ?

People can very well be questioning themselves if what they're feeling is sexual attraction. Or any of the other types of attraction. 

 

It is confusing when you don't know what it is you're feeling. 

 

Please correct me if I'm wrong @Ekru? :) 

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3 minutes ago, Phoenix the II said:

People can very well be questioning themselves if what they're feeling is sexual attraction. Or any of the other types of attraction. 

 

It is confusing when you don't know what it is you're feeling. 

 

Please correct me if I'm wrong @Ekru? :) 

Of course ! Sorry if that came off as rude >.<

What I wanted to ask was like more details (if you agree to share), like what makes you think you might be experiencing sexual attraction, what makes you doubt etc...

Maybe if you describe it it'll be easier to figure out.

I'm also confused all the time haha

Sorry again for being blunt I didn't mean to invalidate you at all

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@Seyla It's fine, it didn't sound rude! So, what makes me think I have sexual attraction is that I have a crush on a girl that I know, and I think physically she's absolutely gorgeous, but I don't know if that's where my physical attraction stops? Would I not be opposed to intimacy with her? That's what I ask myself, but I'm still unsure because I don't really know what sexual attraction feels like, if I have it for her, etc.. So, that's what my problem is. Because it's so hard to figure out my sexual orientation without knowing what sexual attraction itself is, I want help for getting around that so I can get my entire identity together.

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I've never felt sexual attraction so I can't help that much. I also never had a crush on someone.

I can say I sometimes have aesthetic attraction, it's when I find someone pretty/handsome and I want to look at them very often. But it is just pure aesthetic attraction, I don't specifically want to talk to them or be their friend.

I also have a friend for whom I have emotional and sensual attraction. So it's like, I want to talk to her often, to have her attention, to share our feelings etc... But I only started to have physical (non sexual) attraction when we started to be close friends. I started to notice that when I was looking forward to be physically close to her, which is something I usually don't like to be with other people.

That's most of the attractions I have, I don't know if it's helpful.

 

I'm thinking sexual attraction for you would be if you wish to be in sexually intimate situations with her, but I don't really know, please someone with some experience of sexual attraction help ?

 

Also, give yourself time to accumulate evidence. I know it's frustrating to not be sure of anything, but you'll have to figure it out as it goes. As soon as I understood what asexual people experienced, I knew I was like them, but it took me two years to figure out my romantic orientation because before I wasn't paying attention to these things. When you have observed yourself enough I think you'll probably identify as something quite easily.

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On 1/18/2019 at 10:51 AM, Ekru? said:

So uhhHHHhh HI I've identified as bisexual for a while and I may still be, but I'm questioning my romantic orientation? I might be polyromantic?? For those who don't know, polyromantic is feeling romantic attraction to more than 2 genders, but not ALL genders like pan or omni. I've been asking myself questions like "Would I date an agender person? Would I date a gender-fluid person?" etc., but when it comes to sexual attraction I'm confused. I'm quoisexual, meaning that I have a hard time distinguishing sexual attraction from other types of attraction, have a hard time understanding sexual attraction as a concept/feeling, and don't know if I feel sexual attraction. So, it's hard to figure out my sexuality when I can't even understand sexual attraction. I ask myself the same kind of questions that I mentioned before, like "Could I see myself having sex with a girl? With a guy? With an nb?" But I still don't know?? I could really use some help thanks

I define as biromantic because I’ve had romantic feelings for men & women. I may increase to poly or pan if I ever develop feelings for other genders 🙂

 

Quoisexual is a new term to me but I think I can relate.

 

I feel romantic, aesthetic and sensual attraction very strongly. So strongly I thought I was heterosexual for a long time.

 

In the end I identify as a sex-neutral asexual. I love sensual contact and I get aroused from it, but I’d be happy never having sex again. To me sex is “meh” 🙂

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