Veggie4

I Think She Avoids Me...

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Veggie4

I've been with my partner for over a year. Everything was good, we had arguments a few times, but it's nothing serious. Recently, after her behavior, I conclude that she is avoiding me. For example, She leaves home when I come back home (live together), she sits in a different place as we travel by bus together, do not talk much (we used to talk for hours) and the worst is that she doesn't want to go to the cinema, etc ...
I'm confused. Is it a wont or something happen between us?

 

edit: solved, she was just jealous...I used the method that provokes honest conversation and everything is okay.

 

edit: oh and btw, by typing "method" I mean a few things that bring the right atmosphere to the relationship and provoke an honest conversation between two people.

I read this in the ebook, which wrote my personal mentor about relationships. It is free, so if anyone is interested, I invite you, you can order it to your email on this page: https://bit.ly/2M305k0

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Grimalkin

That's verrrry weird behavior. I can't imagine deliberately sitting away from my partner on a bus.

 

Frankly, I think the only thing you can do is call her out on it and ask what's up. No yelling, no arguing, just straight up pleasant communication. If she denies it, tell her that you've been feeling uncomfortable with the distance lately and ask if there's anything you can do to help.

 

Hopefully she's willing to talk. But if this kind of thing happens regularly, or if she deals with problems by giving you the silent treatment, I would be wary about taking this relationship further.

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GoneForGood

Welcome to AVEN

 

The only one who is going to know for sure is her. If she continues to refuse to talk to you I can only assume that she no longer considers the two of you to be in a relationship

 

It is a tradition here to welcome new people with cake, here is a variety.
ef42b8e83d25f2ff48093b7e8d83a130.jpg 

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xstatic

Yeah this doesn't sound great.  Clearly there is something going on.  Talk to them about it.  Maybe they had a misunderstanding recently and they are just on edge.  Maybe it's something more severe.  But I don't think that just waiting around to see what happens is a good idea.  

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nanogretchen4

Are you the asexual partner in a mixed relationship? She might feel that you have been rejecting her or ignoring her needs, in which case she is now sulking in hopes that you will ask her what's wrong. 

 

Or, regardless of orientation, it is possible that she is depressed. It is also possible that she doesn't want to be living with you right now but has not yet found another place to live. Or she could be an introvert whose battery is completely drained and now she's desperate for some alone time.

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Veggie4

Thanks, tomorrow I'm going to talk to her. I was surprised by her's behavior, it did not happen before. We'll see.

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xstatic

Good luck to you!

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Veggie4

She says she does not see the problem at all, and that she sits elsewhere on the bus because "it does not matter at all" I have a feeling that she did not talk to me honestly.

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Veggie4

I found a way to convince her to a honest conversation ... I hope that it will work and we will talk honestly about our current situation. I'll try it tomorrow.

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MrDane

My ace wife did some of that. If I sat on the couch, and I liked to sit close to her. Then she would either ask ‘could you scoop over, please?’ Or get up, walk away for a few seconds and sit down away from me. Why? Because she was filled up to the brink by my romantic side. Possibly because the sex and the touch took too much of a toll on her. She needed her space.

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Veggie4

using the method she talked to me honestly ... what was it? it was all about that she wanted to give me a "punishment" because she thought I would ignore her for her bestfriend (she was arguing with heralso). I ll be honest, in my life I would not even think that it was about it, but it's good that we talked honestly and explained everything and all is good now ... ehhh, these women are sometimes really ... anyway, thanks for all the answers

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Veggie4

Yes, today I can confirm 100% that everything is okay between us.

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Veggie4

Hi, I have a another question What do you think about checking the parner's phone? Does it mean lack of trust or foresight? What is your opinion?

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Traveler40
5 minutes ago, Veggie4 said:

Does it mean lack of trust...?

😂 there are no words....

 

Edit: Seriously, YES!

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Telecaster68

You could ask to look at her phone, if you're suspicious. If she's got anything to hide, she'll be defensive. She might also be defensive because she's innocent and offended you don't trust her. Only you can tell. 

 

If she's happy to hand it over, she's either innocent or she's covered her tracks. 

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nanogretchen4

Checking your partner's phone is very wrong, but less wrong than cheating. If you check and as far as you can tell, she is innocent, you are the villian of the story. If you check and discover that she is guilty, her betrayal is enough worse than yours that she is still the villian. Don't do it unless you know full well that she's cheating and you just need proof.

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Veggie4

he, I have not done it. I do not suspect her of anything, but sometimes I had the opportunity and I had a moral dilemma.
I think that it depends only on the one who checks, because the owner of the phone will never know and if the conscience allows such a "checker" of the phone then talk to the person in the eyes then he can make sure on cheating.

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