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What do you think when people say "People can't be friends with the opposite sex"?

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will123

Reading the recent posts brought to mind something the friend I came out to last week. 

 

Prior to me knowing her she had a long term boyfriend. Quite a few years later she was telling me about an attempt of her's to contact the now married ex (why I have no idea). She proceded to tell me that the wife had answered the phone and apparently to my friend's surprise, some not so pleasant words were exchanged. To which she more or less said to me, why?

 

I thought to myself, "You need to buy a 

Spoiler

fucking

clue!"

 

I had no idea at the time I was aro ace, but I think I had some common sense when it came to relationships and friendships.

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Xue

That's really true. 

I used to stress to my ex that his friends should get to know me and vice versa. This includes girls. 

From the flip side, it's only so I don't get myself riled up by the idea that my ex is hanging out way too much with them.  

Also, it gives me an opportunity to get to know them and form an opinion, rather than have a looming imaginary figure in the background.

Mutual respect, in a way. 

 

Same with any of my friends that are dating.

Their girlfriends need to know me. I really don't want the guy to have to duke it out with them and come up with excuses as to why we're close buds hanging out. 

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Gingerpud

A lot of the time I prefer to hang out with guys than girls because I just get on better with them and most girls I know just spend a lot of time talking about “hot guys” which I couldn’t care less about.

 

One of my best friends are a guy and it really annoys me how people just assume that I have a crush on him because I hang out with him and because we’re friends and it’s obvious that it bothers both of us when people say “oh you have a crush on each other”.

 

It is possible to have friends who are a different gender to you and for you to not have crushes on each other!

 

Also the other day I was playing football with a guy and people asked us if we were siblings. When they learnt we weren’t they asked if we were dating. Why can’t we just be friends?! It’s stupid

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will123

@Gingerpud

 

I wish dating was all people had said about what I was doing with a friend that was female...

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AngelofMusic997

I think people who say that are: 
**
a) Freaking idiots.

b) horny af. 

** All based on previous experience. Terrible experience. Not good experience. But previous experience, nonetheless. 

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Agentr9154

I find it ridiculous really.I have a bisexual friend,does that mean they cant have any friends since they like both sexes? by the logic of the saying,thatd be how it worked.While yes,psychologically you are more likely to date a friend,thats only because you know them better and trust them more than a stranger or something.

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Zagadka

Can people just not control their genitals? Like, they have to have sex with everything? How hard is that?

 

I will never understand humans. This is why I imagined being "broken" for so long, none of this makes sense.

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will123
Just now, Zagadka said:

Can people just not control their genitals? Like, they have to have sex with everything? How hard is that?

 

I will never understand humans. This is why I imagined being "broken" for so long, none of this makes sense.

I'm spending tomorrow with a friend that I'm out to. He made a comment about his Plenty Of Fish days. Around the time I identified as asexual (2005) he was forever bugging me to sign up. I had no interest in sex or romance so I just told him I was too busy...

 

I didnt have time to ask him about his comment. Was he on the site purely for sexual purposes or did he want to meet some for a longer term. I also want to ask him 'how does sex happen?"

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Darth Plagueis the Wise

I assume that if they have that much problem interacting with the opposite sex normally without sexual stuff being brought up:

1) they were never around members of the opposite sex much if at all while growing up

2) hormones have caused them to have a really high sex drive (then again anything is a high sex drive from my perspective)

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