newconfusedbutthriving Posted December 20, 2018 Share Posted December 20, 2018 I am just so confused here. I like sex, but get really fucking anxious if something is going in and out of me constantly. Like that's so weird what the fuck. and why does it feel good,, I feel disgusting after sex and seriously never want to have sex even though I'm so pro sex. Will I always feel this way? Link to post Share on other sites
uhtred Posted December 20, 2018 Share Posted December 20, 2018 Have you had any bad experiences with respect to sex, or were you brought up to believe that it is bad / dirty? Its not surprising that sex feels good (to many people), there is strong evolutionary pressure in that direction. Link to post Share on other sites
GoneForGood Posted December 20, 2018 Share Posted December 20, 2018 I have had similar experiences. I have had sex with a number of people. Mostly with people I really cared but not always. Thinking about it is always weird but like you have said, the physical sensations are positive, if they were not I would never have had sex in my life. Link to post Share on other sites
newconfusedbutthriving Posted December 21, 2018 Author Share Posted December 21, 2018 8 hours ago, uhtred said: Have you had any bad experiences with respect to sex, or were you brought up to believe that it is bad / dirty? Its not surprising that sex feels good (to many people), there is strong evolutionary pressure in that direction. I mean, no not exactly. sex has always felt good to me, but I'm just emotionally not into it. It really sucks because i have these needs. the only time I'll have sex now is with sex toys. I've never grown up with any negativity around the topic. I just feel like it's such a weird thing. I love sex with toys bc it's on my own terms I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
everywhere and nowhere Posted December 21, 2018 Share Posted December 21, 2018 I have never has sex and with all likelihood never will, but I have some slightly similar feelings with regards to self-pleasuring. Normally, I'm sex-averse, but not sex-repulsed - that is, the idea of personally having sex feels intensely frightening, distressing and just impossible to me, but it doesn't extend to sex in general. I may be critical of a lot of sex, I strongly condemn sexual pressure, I believe that sex can never be apolitical and couples should actively take care not to reproduce social inequalities in sex... But still I don't find sex in general disgusting, I can have third-person fantasies... And after an orgasm I often immediately feel disgusted with everything sexual, I just lay there frustrated and think "why am I doing such disgusting and pointless things?". I also could add that for whatever reason I find arousal better than orgasm itself - the latter is just bland and disappointing... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted December 21, 2018 Share Posted December 21, 2018 48 minutes ago, newconfusedbutthriving said: I mean, no not exactly. sex has always felt good to me, but I'm just emotionally not into it. It really sucks because i have these needs. the only time I'll have sex now is with sex toys. I've never grown up with any negativity around the topic. I just feel like it's such a weird thing. I love sex with toys bc it's on my own terms I guess. That would be classed as masturbation, not sex. Maybe you're just someone who isn't into partnered sex, even if you can enjoy the sensations? We do have a lot of people around here (aces) who just don't enjoy or desire partnered sex enough for them to want it to be an active part of their lives, but many of them still masturbate with toys or otherwise. It's perfectly possible to be someone who loves the feelings of sexual stimulation but just doesn't get enough out of it on any other level to want to actively seek it out with other people. Would you be fine with masturbating on your own for the rest of your life, or would you be sad if you couldn't share sex with other people in the future? Link to post Share on other sites
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