Agent_Smith Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 Feel free to move this post around, as I couldn’t find a place for it to fit. Anyway, a few days ago, I told my two dads that I was ace, and they didn’t believe me. I tried to explain to them that I wasn’t to yound to know, and that I can think for myself. They seemed to not be open to the idea that I wasn’t heterosexual. Should I try to tell them later, or just not mention it again? I don’t know what to do at this point in time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 @Agent_Smith I don't think they're willing to listen, based on what you've described. My advice is to live your life, and when you're much older, they'll likely realise they were wrong about you. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 Could you not point out the hypocrisy of two non-straight men not believing you aren't straight? 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Koning Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 You've told them. If they refuse to believe you after elaborating it, leave it be. You might waste your time continuing it. They'll probably realize and accept it in time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Koning Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 1 minute ago, Anthracite_Impreza said: Could you not point out the hypocrisy of two non-straight men not believing you aren't straight? True, though there is the myth/stereotype that two men raising a kid makes a kid gay, queer or anything non-straight. Idk, it might have something to do with their denial; that they think their homosexuality influenced their kid to identify as something out of the norm. Certainly if their kid seemed like a regular heterosexual beforehand. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 2 minutes ago, Koning said: True, though there is the myth/stereotype that two men raising a kid makes a kid gay, queer or anything non-straight. Idk, it might have something to do with their denial; that they think their homosexuality influenced their kid to identify as something out of the norm. Certainly if their kid seemed like a regular heterosexual beforehand. I don't see why it would matter even if it was true; sounds like internalised queerphobia to me, or at least, caring too much what queerphobes think. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 I mean, the only other thing I can think to suggest, besides giving them a few years to realise you are Ace, is to show them this, http://www.whatisasexuality.com/family-and-friends/parents/ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Agent_Smith Posted December 16, 2018 Author Share Posted December 16, 2018 Thank you all, this has been very helpful! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
secrethamster Posted December 17, 2018 Share Posted December 17, 2018 If you really want them to know, bring it up again. Some people take you seriously if you are insistent. If you are worried about them having a more negative reaction, then I would let it be and time can show them they were wrong to doubt you. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nanogretchen4 Posted December 17, 2018 Share Posted December 17, 2018 If they don't believe you, that's annoying but so what? They aren't going to disown you or send you to conversion therapy or anything. This pretty much falls within the category of stuff parents do that irritate teenagers. It may be best to ignore their reaction unless you need them to help you in some specific way, like driving you to a meeting for asexual teens for example. In that case, focus your persuasive efforts on the help you need from them rather than on trying to get them to believe your orientation. Continuing to argue now probably won't make believers of them. Instead, designate the day you tried to come out as "Asexual Day", and come out to them on that same day once a year until they believe you. Every time you bring it up you will be one year older and you will also have stuck with the same story for another year. Both of these factors will make your claims about your orientation more convincing to your parents each time you tell them. Even after they believe you, you could still celebrate Asexual Day with feasting and a festive outfit or something. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ButterflyBlues Posted December 17, 2018 Share Posted December 17, 2018 If you want to try again, go for it! I myself am going to wait until I'm a little bit older because "you can't be asexual if you haven't had sex" (which is not true btw) Someone sent this link to me, and I personally found it helpful: http://www.whatisasexuality.com/family-and-friends/parents/ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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