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“Aha” Moment


Purple_Panda

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5 hours ago, Purple_Panda said:

@anisotropic, I’m sorry you have to go through that and feel like that. Hopefully  you’ll have the opportunity to do what you want and need to soon.

Haha. It's fine. I'm nearly 40 I think I can take it. Name changes are tedious and I'm waiting for the right moment to get to it.

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ConfusedButHere

  I remember watching this lesbian youtuber that i watch and her video on "her androgyny," and at one point I think she said something along the lines of it also being a gender some people identified as but to her it was just the way she liked to present. I sat there thinking, "oh wait, I resonate with this a lot" and of all the different signs I gave off when I was younger that suggested I wasn't cis, too. Then, I told myself to chill out and put that whole gender thing on the back burner because I had just recently gotten comfortable with my sexuality lmao.

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My gender was in the back of my subconscious for years - didn't fully start thinking of it until two years ago where i basically went around in circles for ages and then one evening while i was fucking vacuuming of all things i was hit with a very stupidly strong feeling of gender and that "Oh Yeah I'm actually trans" thought hit me - tbh it was the happiest i've felt in the past few years finally realising like that... though i mean just why bloody vacuuming????

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