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Has anyone adopted kids, in sexless marriage or as a single person?


banana247

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Just curious. I'm pretty asexual and can't for the life of me imagine ever wanting sex or even being married, though I do desire strong loyal companionship and probably kids at some point.

 

I have worked with kids in the foster system a lot throughout my life and my mom was a foster mom who took in kids when I was younger, so I'm pretty set on adopting. There's a lot of kids who, troubled as they may be, really need someone.

 

Just curious if anyone has chosen to marry and abstain, but adopt kids, or, remain single/celibate but become a single parent through adoption.

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I consider the lack of offspring or human dependents as the single biggest bonus of being asexual.  It compliments the freedom and independence thing.

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no-longer-in-use

I know someone who adopted as a single parent and raised their adopted child with no spouse or partner for many years. It's definitely possible.

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I never adopted but I took care of my niece for the first five years of her life. Her parents had busy work schedules and being a software developer I had a flexible schedule. I wasn't truly a parent but I did all the stuff from diapers, feeding, driving her to nursery school, taking her on bike rides, bathing her, putting her to bed, etc. Now she is 12 and pretty much ignores me when she sees me. 

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My wife and I haven't adopted, and don't plan to. For the last 3 years we have lived with my sister and her kids, and fill a bit of a parently role for them as my sister and her wife work when we're both disabled and at home. Her kids are more than enough for us. Early on in our marriage, we were considering adoption because my wife can't have kids, but various physical and mental issues made that impossible.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Ew, tiny humans. I don't like them and I don't want them anywhere near me.

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I haven't done it, but with the right partner I'd definitely give it some serious consideration.

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  • 1 month later...

Yes, desperately. I've wanted to since I was a teen. I always thought that I HAD to get married and have kids of my own (thanks Mom and Dad for that). But when I turned 33 I decided I was going to do it on my own. I out together a plan...go back to school, change careers, do what I could so set my life up to adopt kids. I have somewhat changed careers (got out of a very abusive industry) and am almost done with school. I have foster to adopt agencies calling me but I don't make enough money to have an2 bedroom apt yet so I still have to wait. ☹️

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  • 6 months later...

I'm thinking about it. But it's very difficult in my country. I hope that such a system will be established that is easy for children to live in.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I adopted my daughter in 2000.  She is now in college.  I was a single parent by choice.  I had partners leading up to becoming a parent, but was still struggling with figuring out who I was.  I immersed myself in mothering and essentially put my own needs and identity on the back burner until recently.  She is strong, confident, and sure of who she is so I must have done something right!  She recently came out to me as being gay and I am so proud of her and the wonderful person she is.  I'm now 57 and I've been aware of my asexuality for years, but never voice this to anyone, which brings me to this forum.  I think it is her strength and assuredness in who she is that has spurred me on to accept who I am and move on with the next chapter in my life. 

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