Gender identity switching at will?

[Lucaloo]

Hi so I’ve been questioning my gender on and off for a while because it’s kinda funky. I’m born female. I’m pretty happy being a girl most of the time. But I get this weird feeling when I’m by myself, like if I’m thinking or hanging out alone at home, like I’m not very female at all, more like androgynous? There have been times where I’ll think “when I’m an old man” and then realize I will never be an old man because I’m not a man. This seems like I’m kind of non-binary but what’s weird is that as soon as anything reminds me that I’m female, like talking to someone or seeing myself in a feminine pose, I just feel like a girl again. Then the opposite triggers make me feel non-binary. I really like the term bigender, but it seems like most people forcibly become genders against their will. If I wear a collared shirt, I feel like a non-binary person, and if I wear a dress, I feel like a girl. I also therefore don’t feel any dysphoria as far as I know. Are there any terms for this kind of switching or labels I should look at? Is this even a real thing?

[Guest]

17 minutes ago, Lucabean said:

and if I wear a dress, I feel like a girl. 

 

Wearing a dress doesn't 'make one a girl' though, just like wearing a collared shirt doesn't 'make one a man' 😕

 

How would you even describe 'feeling like a girl'? Because for the most part, people just feel like people. Somedays we might feel differently than others, but yeah.. 

 

Actually, I'm just going to bow out of this one before I get in trouble..

[Lucaloo]

9 hours ago, Ficto. said:

 

Wearing a dress doesn't 'make one a girl' though, just like wearing a collared shirt doesn't 'make one a man' 😕

 Yes that’s what makes this so weird. I’m not trying to reinforce gender stereotypes, I’m saying my experience. It’s like if I look feminine, then I act feminine, I sound feminine, and my identity feels feminine, but if I look androgynous or do actions I associate with androgyny, my identity feels androgynous.  

 

Quote

How would you even describe 'feeling like a girl'?

Welp that’s the big question isn’t it? There’s like tons of other ppl who have asked this in other questions, check those out. To me it’s almost like a tint, like an underlying feeling that colors my actions and interests and thoughts. I just feel different in a fundamental way. 

[anisotrophic]

My hope for taking T is that I'm more able to sometimes do feminine things as a choice/state, and it's not just me doing "default" performance.

 

I want to be very physically in between, then the switching performance becomes meaningful. Without the physical changes, I'm very uncomfortable with feminine performance, as it's not communicating to others my internal sense of arbitrariness regarding which performance I'm engaging in.

 

That's just me.

[Just Somebody]

I guess what others are trying to say is that :

 

 

Gender identity are just words you feel more comfortable for whatever reasons being referred as at the moment or the box you feel more comfortable and better represented being inside as the moment.... that's it, pretty simple.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gender expression is what other people get to perceive on you (your behaviors,  your name and pronouns,  your body and biological sex,  your clothes, etc)

 

[Just Somebody]

On 12/15/2018 at 7:52 AM, anisotropic said:

My hope for taking T is that I'm more able to sometimes do feminine things as a choice/state, and it's not just me doing "default" performance.

 

I want to be very physically in between, then the switching performance becomes meaningful. Without the physical changes, I'm very uncomfortable with feminine performance, as it's not communicating to others my internal sense of arbitrariness regarding which performance I'm engaging in.

 

That's just me.

Relatable.

[the-duck-knight]

My two cents is that whether you switch at will or whether it's against your will, the same terms can still apply. If bigender is a label you feel fits you, or is a label you're comfortable with, then go for it! Another option that might fit might be genderflux? Either way, what's most important is that you're comfortable

[nerdperson777]

I read the title and instantly thought genderfluid.  I do believe in age fluidity also.  For it it's probably an autism thing, but most of the time I don't feel my age, I'm usually younger.  Taking from two instances in my life, I'd say that my mental age tends to grow at a 60% speed of my physical age.  So you can feel like an old man if you want to.  Sometimes it's weird for me because usually I'm a 12-13 year old boy, but sometimes I turn into an old guy, and sometimes I feel ageless.

[Fluffy Femme Guy]

I've got a similar thing too. It seems my internal sense of gender is very weak.

I have no problem at all being biologically male, having a male name and people referring to me with masculine pronouns.
But my personality is very androgynous and I prefer to present in a mix of masculine and feminine attire which varies depending on the time, place, and how I feel.
I have never felt any kind of dysphoria as far as I can tell.

I'll see if I can dig up the post but someone here mentioned 'cis agender' , where basically your mind/brain doesn't have a sense of gender and so decides based on biology and/or social constructs, or other 'outside' information.
 

[nerdperson777]

1 hour ago, Fluffy Femme Guy said:

I'll see if I can dig up the post but someone here mentioned 'cis agender' , where basically your mind/brain doesn't have a sense of gender and so decides based on biology and/or social constructs, or other 'outside' information.

Cisgenderless?

[Fluffy Femme Guy]

9 hours ago, nerdperson777 said:

Cisgenderless?

Yeah, that's it.
 

 

http://gender.wikia.com/wiki/Cis-genderless
 

[K.I.N.G]

I can relate to this - I use to be able to do or wear something and it would help me feel more feminine or masculine - I always got the impression it was more about putting yourself in that frame of mind and open to feeling those things sort of thing.

 

I'm pretty sure I have seen a term for where your gender changes depending on the different situations you were in though I have no idea where sorry.

 

Really though it's more up to you and what you find the most comfortable - good luck!

[Fluffy Femme Guy]

I mentioned before not having dysphoria.

I recently learned 'social dysphoria' is a thing, and I've certainly had that.

The simplest way I can put it is when one is fine with being with 'being themself' but your society/culture hopes/expect you to 'get back in your gender box' so to speak, or simply rejects/shames you.