Jump to content

Gay sexual and married to asexual


CaGuy

Recommended Posts

I am in a same-sex relationship for 33 years, sex was never great but it happened usually initiated by me. Sex is no longer he says he's asexual and has been his whole life and we have stopped any type of sexual contact.  He's happy, I'm miserable and he won't talk about it.  Help!

 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome to AVEN!

 

Perhaps writing your feelings down in a letter to him, since you two have to talk about it, but he won't.

 

Incidentally, it is a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake,

ZWughhv.jpg

Link to post
Share on other sites

Stuff that affects one part of the relationship, in a sincere way, should be ‘dealt’ with by the whole relationship. A good and caring partner would do so.  Please note, that I donot suggest what theycome up with and how they will do it, but not dealing with this issue will most probably leave the sexual in a miserable condition. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...
nanogretchen4

The four options for a mixed relationship are:

 

1. Sexual compromise

2. The sexual gives up sex forever

3. The sexual gets sex outside the relationship 

4. Separation

 

Your partner apparently made the unilateral decision to pursue option one for 33 years without mentioning that he has never wanted sex. Now he thinks he can unilaterally dictate option two without any further discussion. Partners in longterm relationships don't owe each other sex, but they sure do owe each other ongoing communication about serious issues in their relationship. Communication doesn't seem to be your partner's strength, so I suggest that you should refuse to stop bringing the topic up until you find an option that is tolerable for both partners. Option three is not uncommon in longterm gay relationships, but that one can only work if your partner decides to start communicating about the relationship. If he just refuses to communicate eventually you'll be looking at option four.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...