AmorphousBlob

Once a week?

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AmorphousBlob

Apparently the average adult couple has sex once a week. I am legitimately confused by this. That seems like so much work! Why that often? Doesn't it get tiring?

 

This isn't meant to be insulting/offensive/whatever, this is just straight up confusion and a bit of curiosity. I'm asexual, so I don't really get a lot of this stuff.

 

(Not quite sure if this is the right category to put this, sorry if it isn't)

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Bio 7

It baffles me.

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Puck

I think for the average sexual, it's not work, which is the point :P I often hear it's stress-relieving and is a net positive. It's not like sex is wildly time consuming, so they find an hour or so to be intimate with their partner once a week, it's not that much time. Think of it like going out to eat with a friend once a week for bonding/stress-relieving purposes.

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uhtred

The whole point for sexuals is that it isn't work, but something they enjoy.  Something that makes them feel happy and relaxed and in love.   Some couples make love every day or even more often. 

 

Its like going for  a walk if you live next to a beautiful park.  Or going out for dinner.  Or watching your favorite TV series. 

 

Some people go running several times a week because they enjoy it.

 

Of course for asexuals, it would be work. 

 

 

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blue dog

once a week is most likely just to release build up of a physical nature, seems masterbating about that often for that reason works for me, tho my sexual partner is left empty and not pleased with her situation. 

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AmorphousBlob

Guess it wouldn't be work to people that actually enjoy it...

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Snao Cone

That seems on the low side to me, actually. That means for every couple that has sex three times a week there are two that have no sex at all.

 

It might take work sometimes, but it meets a deep emotional and physical need. Most couples share a bed anyway, so it's not like they need to put much planning into it most of the time. 

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CBC

Lol, I sincerely hope I would be having sex more than once a week if I was in a relationship where that was possible. I know couples who have sex nearly every day (and I'm not talking about the honeymoon stage of a relationship where you basically live in bed 24/7) and... well, nah, that's a bit much personally... but my ideal would be probably anywhere from 2-5 times. I think that's very normal. And once a week is definitely not too often for most folks.

 

I do get where you're coming from though. When I was in a relationship that wasn't a good match for me orientation-wise (or even when thinking about hypothetical relationships, when I was assuming things about myself that turned out to be incorrect), I was definitely like, why do people want to do this so much?! I figured I could probably warm up to the idea of once or twice a month at most. Well, before I actually started having sex approximately that often and being super uncomfortable with it a lot of the time, and eventually just stopping altogether. So yeah, it's going to seem unnecessarily frequent to you because you're not into anyone sexually, aka you're asexual. Just as the idea of frequent sex weirded me out when I was imagining and/or having it with a guy. You're not wired for it at all, I'm not really wired to fuck dudes. Sex you're not into is tedious and unappealing.

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RosyIcepick

Contrary to what porn would have everyone believe, sex does not last upwards of three hours. More like 30 mins-1 hour, which isn't too significant out of a week.

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Duke Memphis

It sounds comparable to watching the new episode of your favorite show every week when it airs. If you really like the show, you can't wait for the new episode to air. If you have no reason or desire to watch the show whatsoever, then the show giving a new episode each week might be annoyingly frequent.

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CBC
30 minutes ago, Duke Memphistopheles said:

It sounds comparable to watching the new episode of your favorite show every week when it airs. If you really like the show, you can't wait for the new episode to air. If you have no reason or desire to watch the show whatsoever, then the show giving a new episode each week might be annoyingly frequent.

Precisely. People make time for what's important to them. It's pretty simple, really.

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FictoCannibal.
4 hours ago, AmorphousBlob said:

I am legitimately confused by this. That seems like so much work! Why that often? Doesn't it get tiring?

Because it's fun and it's not hard work for people who enjoy it. If I had a partner who was into it the way I like it we'd have it more than once a week, even though I don't place much importance on sex. It's just something fun we could do together.

 

I like to draw way more than once a week. For some people that may seem like heaps and way too much work, but I love doing it so much that it's not work at all. Sex is like that for people who enjoy it.

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Telecaster68

About thirty years ago, my landlady had a stash of amusing books in her loo, including one of hilariously outdated and prudish sex advice from Victorian agony aunts. It was called 'Once a week is ample' - obviously the joke was that once a week is not ample.

 

The Kinsey Institute, which has decades of research on this, has these figures for established couples - I'm giving you the broadbrush averages; they break it down in far more detail and obviously every couple is different.

 

20s - two or three times a week

30s - once or twice a week

40s - 4-6 times a month

 

In general, frequency declines as you get older, but most sexual couples have some kind of sex life into their seventies.

 

 

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Skycaptain

There's a joke about condoms coming in packets of six nine and twelve. Your nationalities here vary according to personal taste 

 

Nation 1, a packet of 6, = once a night and leave Sunday free for prayer 

Nation 2, a packet of 9, = once a night and twice at weekends 

Nation 3, a packet of 12, = January, February, March.... 

 

Ultimately every one, or every couple are different, and frequency will vary depending on other factors 

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Kayze

Considering sex itself varies in activity, components involved, time, and effort (e.g. positions), once a week isn't that much.

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Deus Ex Infinity
On 10/24/2018 at 4:55 PM, Puck said:

I think for the average sexual, it's not work, which is the point :P I often hear it's stress-relieving and is a net positive. It's not like sex is wildly time consuming, so they find an hour or so to be intimate with their partner once a week, it's not that much time. Think of it like going out to eat with a friend once a week for bonding/stress-relieving purposes.

I can totally agree from my own experience. It's almost exactly like that. Easy, stress-relieving and satisfying. It might be hard or impossible to understand  (no offense!) but there's just no other way to answer this question. That's just the way it is. It's no hard work but fun to do.

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CBC
23 minutes ago, Deus Ex Infinity said:

I can totally agree from my own experience. It's almost exactly like that. Easy, stress-relieving and satisfying. It might be hard or impossible to understand  (no offense!) but there's just no other way to answer this question. That's just the way it is. It's no hard work but fun to do.

Yeah, sex is not a chore if you enjoy it and want to be doing it. I love listening to podcasts. Some of them are serious and educational, some more personal human interest stuff, some are funny and lighthearted. I really really love podcasts (and public radio). Most days, I take time to listen to something, be it for 20 minutes or three hours. This is not tedious or bothersome, it's something I easily incorporate into my day. I'm not currently in a situation where sex with that level of frequency is possible, but if it was, it would also not be work and would actually contribute to stress-reduction, relaxation, enjoyment, overall satisfaction etc. Like my podcasts do. (But, not gonna lie, I'd definitely take sex over a podcast haha. Which doesn't mean I'd ever want to do without my podcasts!)

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