ConfusedEarthlingXD

OCD? or sex repulsed? or something else???

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ConfusedEarthlingXD

Whats up yall this is my first post Im not even sure Im posting this in the right area, but here goes: im 16, and for the first 15 years of my life. a main driver of my motivation and emotions was good old love/attraction: i would get attractions and crushes easily and would love to fantasize and loved the feeling of being in "love"....but after a while, I never realized I never thought about sex before...like i never cared what was under peoples clothes. Now, all i can think about are the disgusting parts of human anatomy- (forgive my directness) (buttholes, germs, un- ideal conditions) and now I lost all romantic feelings for girls. I cannot look at a human the same way anymore, and I lost all vibes. All i think about 24 7 is "dude chill this is what makes us human and its a small part of the body etc etc", but then when i look at a human I immdeitly think about how disgusting they are in THAT specific place...yes people shower and all that I know how dumb my thought process sounds. But I cant get over it, I am starting to feel like I will never have genuine affection again for a person, my mind is CONSUMED with this. Is this OCD? I get headaches sometimes contridicting myself and have some "complusions" to overcome my thoughts temporarily....OK it all boils down to do i have OCD or like am i just sex repulsed? I have no efffin clue someone help I am so depressed, because my driving force for life is gone......this "thought process" has been going on for a year... 

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MichaelTannock

@ConfusedEarthlingXD Welcome to AVEN!

 

I'll be honest I don't know how to help you.

 

How did this start?

 

Incidentally, it's a tradition here to welcome new members by offering cake,

ZWughhv.jpg

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ConfusedEarthlingXD

@MichaelTannock so bascially I moved a lot, and there was a whole summer I spent just by myself, with no friends and no hobbies just in the house. From then on i had one obsession or the other that consumed my mind, and once i am free from one obsession, another one comes back. This is one of my main obsessions that are now kind of my identity..so yeah, Thanks for being honest i dont know how to help myself either

 

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The Angel of Eternity

@ConfusedEarthlingXD Hi! Welcome to heAVEN! Have an infinite amount of :cake:!

 

You know, it's understandable how you feel. I think it could be a mixture of OCD and sex repulsion. I'll tell you, if I had OCD thoughts about stuff like that, I'm sure I'd be feeling the exact same way.

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lazypanda

Hi there, welcome to Aven. Have some cake !!! 🍰😀

 

While all humans are somewhat disgusted by the you-know-what parts(yea, i dont like to say their names, like Voldemort), the fact that you are consumed with them so much is a little concerning, so i would go with OCD. But you can break your thoughts with some good CBT, so don't worry you will be stuck like thos forever. Good Luck !!!

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ldap

Hey, as somebody who also suffers from OCD I just thought I'd chip in and say it sounds like that's what it is to me. 

 

OCD is normally triggered by a thought that concerns you (in this case, seemingly that some bits of people are disgusting) and, if it freaks you out enough, that thought can stick around and come back again and again. It never fails to amaze me that, once it's established itself, an OCD thought can pop into my head really fast once it's been triggered - I wish the rest of my brain worked that fast!

 

As lazypanda says, you can fix this and not be stuck with these thoughts forever. I've struggled with thoughts about a specific trigger, and through a combination of things (time, treatment, understanding them) they go away, and I can be disturbance free again. Sometimes they come back again, but I know I've beaten them once before and recognise them as OCD thoughts, so it gets easier.

 

In addition to CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) and good old counselling (which could help rationalise your thoughts, or help you come to terms with being on the ace-spectrum, if you are), something that somebody very wise (my mum!) told me is that OCD can be viewed as a symptom that something in your life is out of balance. Mine started when I left college and my stress levels changed, it spiked up again when I didn't like where I lived, and again when I was unhappy in a job, so maybe take a little bit of a look at what's going on and see if there's anything you can change or manage a little differently (maybe at 16 the things you can change are a little more limited for now, but it's an exercise worth doing).

 

I'm new here myself, so forgot this initially, but have some cake! 🍰

Edited by ldap
Cake!

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