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[aces only] Do you feel like a part of who you are is being rejected if a partner doesn't feel attracted to your body?


Do you feel like a part of who you are is being rejected if a partner doesn't feel attracted to your body?  

26 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you?

    • Yes
      3
    • No
      23


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This question is part of this poll

 

 

but I don't have any more room for it and I only thought of it a while after I made that one. I asked sexuals this too, you can see the results here:

 

Just to make things clearer, a more specific way of asking this question would be "Do you feel like your identity/ what defines you as a person is being rejected if your partner is not attracted to your body?". It implies that you see your body as part of your identity.

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I've never had a partner and don't want one right now, so the question doesn't apply to me.

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Just now, mreid said:

@TheAppallingPhantom an hypothetical one then. I never had a partner and don't want one right now either.

What about those who never want a partner, so the question will never apply? Would they just vote no?

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1 minute ago, mreid said:

I say partner because I meant sexual or antithetical attraction.

Do you mean aesthetic?

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I've never had a partner, but if a partner didn't feel attracted to my body, I don't think it would occur to me to feel like a part of myself is rejected, so I said no.

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Yes, but I don't care whether that attraction is sexual, romantic, or purely aesthetic... and it also doesn't matter which part of my body they're attracted to in terms of whether I feel rejected (but in terms of whether I enjoy that attraction, I'd definitely prefer that they be attracted to my eyes and/or hair).

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Alejandrogynous

I remember a time in highschool, we were watching Pride and Prejudice with Kierra Knightly. One of my classmates who I thought was cute made fun of her for having a flat chest. I was really hurt because I have a small chest (which I'm really grateful for now but was insecure about it back then) and his comments made me feel ugly even if it wasn't about me directly. 

 

As an adult that stuff doesn't really bother me anymore, and I know there's way more to attraction than the physical so it's not such a big deal. Still, my body is a part of who I am so it would hurt if someone I really cared about thought I was actually bad looking. 

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I have never had a relationship, nor have I ever desired one. Still, in this completely hypothetical situation, I would not feel like that at all. I couldn't care much less about how I—or other people—look. For me, having a body gives me the opportunity to experience the world and thoroughly investigate it, so I don't care too much about my appearence. I haven't been sleeping much lately, so sorry if I'm not making much sense :)

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Anthracite_Impreza

I really don't give a shit as long as we love each other; in fact I think I'd be weirded out if they did find me attractive (not that I could judge ;)).

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Knight of Cydonia

No. I value someone's personality and compatibility with me far more than what their body looks like, and it would be hypocritical to feel offended if my partner felt the same way.

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No, I don't care at all.  We need to click as people, not as bodies.

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To Each Their Own
4 hours ago, Feynman said:

I have never had a relationship, nor have I ever desired one. Still, in this completely hypothetical situation, I would not feel like that at all. I couldn't care much less about how I—or other people—look. For me, having a body gives me the opportunity to experience the world and thoroughly investigate it, so I don't care too much about my appearence. I haven't been sleeping much lately, so sorry if I'm not making much sense :)

Pretty much this.

 

And, by the way, since we’re talking about friendship partners...i do have friends that I don’t think are attractive. In fact, I have two that are ugly. I never thought too much about it. I’m probably somewhere in the middle of the ‘attractive spectrum.’  Very happy that I’m not considered to be ‘very attractive’! Personally, I would be extremely uncomfortable if any of my friends were attracted to me.

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I said no, but there was a time when I would have answered yes. But in hindsight, that was more because everyone seemed attracted physically to other girls, and I felt that they were calling me ugly when I didn't get the same attention. It wasn't really associated with my identity; I just felt that it was culturally an insult, and thus felt insulted. As I grew up, I gained more maturity and self-confidence and that went away.

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