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Cis Guys: What the HELL do you do in the bathroom


Roidgy

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13 hours ago, FictoVore. said:

 

DON'T FORGET TO AIM!!

I love how happy and excited she was throughout that whole experience. Oddly heartwarming. 😆

 

Also:

 

“Ok, good boy, we’re going to take this nice and slow and NOBODY’S GOING TO GET HURT.”

 

Was pretty much the mood when I first tried to use my STP packer, so also #relatable.

 

I need this movie in my life YESTERDAY. 🤣

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5 hours ago, Noko42 said:

Lol amateur 😹 cleaning public toilets in my town is far worse 

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When you have people poo in half full jars of chip dip and then smash it on the ceiling to spread EVERYWHERE 🤢🤢 and then finger paint a picture on the wall with the leftover poo 🤮

And that stuff happens constantly here. Men can be discussing lol.

 

With taking ages in to toilet if they are anything like me I just get distracted on my phone and forgot I’m still in there haha 😹

...

 

ERROR 404: WORDS NOT FOUND.

 

But this has just been SUPER kids, just super. Truly a contender for the most entertaining thread I’ve ever read on AVEN. 

 

And thanks for the refill on the nightmare fuel. I was running low.

 

‘preesh. 🤣

 

 

Also, if taking a long time to go no. 2 is a man thing, then y’know...gender confirmed. My IBS is actually Irritable Bigender Syndrome, I guess. 😂

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17 minutes ago, Pixley said:

I need this movie in my life YESTERDAY. 🤣

haha yeah it's a great movie, really funny :P I love the old Jumanji and truly thought this  new one would be crap. Then it was playing on a ferry I was on with my kids so we watched it together and to be honest, I like it even more than the old one!! It's so funny, and had some really original concepts which I loved. Have you seen it yet? I can link you (in PM) to some streams if you need help finding it ^_^

 

Sorry for going off topic @Roidgy!!!

 

Okay, so to get this back ON topic.. maybe Kiwi guys just don't make much mess in the bathroom? People keep talking about how awful men's bathrooms are, but I used to use them quite often back in the day (I hate waiting if all the stalls in the lady's are full) and never remember them being particularly dirty :o I'm talking public toilets at pubs, clubs, that sort of thing. The urinals do smell a bit off sometimes, but other than that I don't remember having any issues with vomit or anything in men's bathrooms!

 

 

 

Just remember guys, the urinal is not a good place to wash one's hands!! :P

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5 hours ago, Noko42 said:

Lol amateur 😹 cleaning public toilets in my town is far worse 

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When you have people poo in half full jars of chip dip and then smash it on the ceiling to spread EVERYWHERE 🤢🤢 and then finger paint a picture on the wall with the leftover poo 🤮

And that stuff happens constantly here. Men can be discussing lol.

 

With taking ages in to toilet if they are anything like me I just get distracted on my phone and forgot I’m still in there haha 😹

Heh. My ex said the men in his workplace always would leave messages for each other written in poop on the walls. Gross ! 

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26 minutes ago, FictoVore. said:

haha yeah it's a great movie, really funny :P I love the old Jumanji and truly thought this  new one would be crap. Then it was playing on a ferry I was on with my kids so we watched it together and to be honest, I like it even more than the old one!! It's so funny, and had some really original concepts which I loved. Have you seen it yet? I can link you (in PM) to some streams if you need help finding it ^_^

 

Sorry for going off topic @Roidgy!!!

 

Okay, so to get this back ON topic.. maybe Kiwi guys just don't make much mess in the bathroom? People keep talking about how awful men's bathrooms are, but I used to use them quite often back in the day (I hate waiting if all the stalls in the lady's are full) and never remember them being particularly dirty :o I'm talking public toilets at pubs, clubs, that sort of thing. The urinals do smell a bit off sometimes, but other than that I don't remember having any issues with vomit or anything in men's bathrooms!

 

 

 

Just remember guys, the urinal is not a good place to wash one's hands!! :P

Ooh yes! Count me in. I’ll PM you later. 👍

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5 minutes ago, Serran said:

Heh. My ex said the men in his workplace always would leave messages for each other written in poop on the walls. Gross ! 

What is with this fascination with feces? 

 

Ever heard of a Sharpie? DAMN. 🤣

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11 hours ago, Lonely Mudkip said:

Well I have bladder shyness so if it's in a public restroom I can take a while.

I've experienced that when younger if say, someone walked into the urinal next to mine as I was getting started. The awkwardness (especially if they accidentally bumped your elbows), just made you take twice as long. Frustrating, as the only thing you wanted was to get the hell out of there.

 

I'm at an age where I don't care anymore.  Even in those troth like urinals, where you're standing elbow to elbow at times to dozens of men. I thought they had stopped making those. I absolutely hate them.

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14 hours ago, Serran said:

I used to clean mens bathrooms, I know.

I think the worst I've experienced was at a hotel in London, UK. Only one common male washroom. I felt sorry for the janitor. About two dozen men had deuced in it, when the first one had clogged it, so the cleaners should have been called then and there. I will leave details out. I really had to go (you know when you drank too much and you have about 5 minutes before you pee in your pants, but going in as is, would've risked me getting splashed by the contents), so unclogged it. I tell my friends this story in detail, and their faces turn pale: " Dude, I would've just walked 5 kilometers to the nearest McDonald's. They're everywhere!"

 

I had actually considered a career in cleaning (via buying a franchise). This probably put an abrupt stop to that.

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Probably the funniest thing that's ever been written in a restroom was something my friend saw in the deep South. It said "raise hell and eat cornbread! Yes! Yee!"

I still laugh when I think of it. I mean if you're going to write something. Write something funny and memorable, not vulgar!

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My pain meds are opiates, so it takes me longer to pee than normal, and I usually have to sit down to do it. It takes me 2 minutes to pee, tops.

 

I do take about 30 to 45 minutes to poo, though, but that's because I'm autistic and have a soft stool that takes longer to move through the intestines. It's always taken me that long, without bringing anything to read.

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8 hours ago, Serran said:

Heh. My ex said the men in his workplace always would leave messages for each other written in poop on the walls. Gross ! 

That's messed up. That's not even a stereotypically man thing to do. Even most male kids I know would think this was disgusting. 

 

I've seen toddlers that would have more manners with their poop than this.

 

That's just where I would question that person's mental stability. 

 

Especially if dealing with heavy machinery. I'd be worried at someone like this operating anything. There isn't even an answer to this.

 

"And you replied?!"

Yes sir, but I was raised that ignoring others is rude.

"And writing with shit on a toilet stall, isn't?!"

 

Just the level of douchebaggery. Unprecedented. 

 

I'm non violent and always preach peace, but any male coworker of mine doing that would get slapped across the face.

 

Its win win. You wouldn't want your boss finding out you did this, so it would be like my slap never happened.

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1 minute ago, Perspektiv said:

That's messed up. That's not even a stereotypically man thing to do. Even most male kids I know would think this was disgusting. 

 

I've seen toddlers that would have more manners with their poop than this.

 

That's just where I would question that person's mental stability. 

 

Especially if dealing with heavy machinery. I'd be worried at someone like this operating anything. There isn't even an answer to this.

 

"And you replied?!"

Yes sir, but I was raised that ignoring others is rude.

"And writing with shit on a toilet stall, isn't?!"

 

Just the level of douchebaggery. Unprecedented. 

 

I'm non violent and always preach peace, but any male coworker of mine doing that would get slapped across the face.

 

Its win win. You wouldn't want your boss finding out you did this, so it would be like my slap never happened.

Well... it was a factory and a lot of people there were on meth, so probably had something to do with it. They did a random drug test and fired like 13 out of 20 people for failing it. o.O

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1 hour ago, Serran said:

Well... it was a factory and a lot of people there were on meth

Okay, that makes more sense. Not really to be honest, but at least it somewhat explains things. I think they had serious issues before the meth, and the drugs just amplified things.

 

I knew brain damage was a factor, and would have been shocked had you stated these were typical law abiding family men.

 

 

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2e4a9596e018fb25db2ca3830d2784db.jpg

 

It's practically an unspoken law that most dudes take a long time in the can while taking a dump. I have no idea what's so sacred about it or why it is that way, but there you go. I read on the john too. Cep't I don't do it in public places. I usually avoid public bathrooms altogether anyway.

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I'm not a physically normal dude and thus can't comment on the usual human male urinary habits, but the stuff I've seen in public stalls, man...and I never even worked in them, just visited when there was nowhere left on the path of bladder relief besides Mordor.

 

Or, uh...cough, cough...m-hm...let me try my best Rutger Hauer circa 1982 impression...

 

tumblr_oxl4n0P6qo1qgten1o7_r1_500.gif

 

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Occult symbols and crude messages written in bodily fluids in decrepit gas station bathrooms. I watched plastic action figures as they lay imprisoned in the depths of the toilets at the Saint Louis Zoo. All those moments will be lost in time, like pee in an ocean of liquid gold. Time...to - *flush*...

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I have seen graffiti galore, but have never experienced men writing with their bodily fluids in stalls. 

 

I would be very vocal if I ever caught a guy doing that.

 

In my downtown cores's largest mall, you will have the standard stuff. IE drunk homeless people peeing all over the floor, unable to aim. So many toilets smell fetid as a result. You could clean hourly, it won't matter. 

 

Or doing their washing up in the sink, which to me should be expected in some areas of town.

 

But bodily fluids? Damn.

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If anyone has seen "Carry on at your convenience", there's a scene where Sid James is testing a prototype toilet seat, the test involves sitting down and seeing if it's a comfortable position to read the paper. 

 

 

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