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Just a question about my asexuality


Noctuovoa

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I've known I'm asexual since the beginning of this year and ever since then, every time I maybe even glance at someone's sexual features you could say, my brain forces sexual thoughts and it makes me miserable every time. Does this still make me asexual? 

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@Noctuovoa Welcome to AVEN!

 

Yes, you're still Asexual, because it doesn't sound like these thoughts make you desire sex with someone.

 

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Yeah, you can still be asexual. It's common to have intrusive thoughts that don't mean you actually want to do the thing.

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The same thing happens to me a lot. I've had OCD before and these unwanted sexual thoughts can be caused by that. So, I always connected them to OCD. I think it's rather psychological than sexual.

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Intrusive thoughts can be part of a mental health condition like OCD, yeah. I'm not asexual but I've had OCD all my life and I'm certainly no stranger to all sorts of intrusive thoughts. Whatever the case, they mean nothing definitive in terms of your sexuality. Intrusive thoughts about sexual stuff are common in those of all orientations with OCD. Speak to your doctor if you're concerned, though; no one here can diagnose you.

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I also suffered from OCD, and back then, whenever I thought that a boy was cute, those disturbing thoughts would rush into my head. I would start to sweat as hell because of the discomfort and would feel so ashamed of myself for thinking such things about people. The images were unbearable. But, I still identify as asexual. These thoughts are not things that you can control unless you talk to a doctor. Also, don't feel ashamed or bad for the images coming to your mind. It's not your fault that they keep popping up. 

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Hi there,

 

I think it is also worth bearing in mind that you acknowledged yourself as asexual only at the beginning of this year, so it may still feel fresh in your mind which may mean that you think about sex a lot more. It doesn’t necessarily mean you want to do it, it could just be that sex in general has been a topic in the forefront of your mind somewhat recently. I acknowledged myself as asexual a couple of months ago, and since then I find myself thinking and overthinking and over analysing all things sex-related in order to make better sense of them. It doesn’t mean that I want sex, and it doesn’t make me not asexual 😊 

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