*No_Idea* Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 So, I was thinking the other day, and I realized I had a 'crush' on my friend. Now, I identify as Aromantic, and I was thinking of a more platonic relationship with her. Except, she's not asexual. If she ever had sexual tendencies, I wouldn't want to 'do it' with her. I wish that I could have her to myself, but to me that seems a bit greedy? I feel like I want to cuddle and all that with her, but in a friendly way? Idk, but if someone could help me??? Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 You could explain a platonic relationship to her, and then fill out and send her this if she understands. Link to post Share on other sites
squaggly Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 That's actually a really cool form, albeit a little corny. But you shouldn't worry about being greedy. From what I've heard from this, you would want to be what I would call best friends. If having a friend makes you greedy, what doesn't? Link to post Share on other sites
StormySky Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 27 minutes ago, squaggly said: But you shouldn't worry about being greedy. From what I've heard from this, you would want to be what I would call best friends. If having a friend makes you greedy, what doesn't? 100% agree with this. You are NOT greedy for wanting this. Want =/= greed. Greed is when you excessively take from what is not necessarily given. The best way to get this: Tell her exactly how you feel. Even in the less formal ways like, "I'd totally cuddle you" or "why are we not BFFs already?" It may seem embarassing, but it sucks even more to deal with misunderstandings Link to post Share on other sites
AspieAlly613 Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 To my mind, it's the "wanting her to yourself" that you'd have to be careful about for ethical reasons, but it sounds like you're already aware of that. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 @*No_Idea* It isn't good to be possessive and you might want to work on that, especially because she will most likely want a romantic relationship at one point or another. She may become sexually attracted to you or she might already be. If that's the case, then you two shouldn't be cuddling if you don't want sex because that isn't fair to her. But you don't owe anyone sex, not even if you're in a relationship with them or you're married to them or you sold them your soul. Link to post Share on other sites
Ceebs Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 I would not suggest pursuing this, unless for some reason you get the idea that she's someone who likes to cuddle with platonic friends. Honestly though, it's not a particularly great idea even if she's into cuddling. Your possessiveness is a bit of a red flag in the sense that you may have trouble dealing with your friend having other relationships -- which she will likely do, if she's sexual and romantic. Or the situation may end up messing with her emotions if she's into you. I'd suggest keeping things as they are. Link to post Share on other sites
Telecaster68 Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 When Harry Met Sally should really be a kind of induction briefing for new AVEN posters. Link to post Share on other sites
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