MayflowerMonstress

I am Very Very Confused

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MayflowerMonstress

Hi, I'm a sixteen-year-old who has in a last ditch effort turned to the people of the internet for help. I have no clue what my sexuality is I might by greysexual which I think would be most likely. I have been attracted to two people (both male) ever in my entire life. So that's ... weird, now if that were it I would say greysexual case closed, however, I've been masturbating since I was like four, I do genuinely enjoy it... but like the same way, I like blueberries or a video game. I have a libido and I have sexual fantasies (all are in the third person). I do want to try to have sex the thought doesn't repulse me but for clitoral stimulation than anything else (I find the idea of penetrative sex mildly unpleasant), but like I said I'm attracted to people in real life like once every three years. Any thought? 

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ReyGraves

It does sound like greysexual. Masturbating or having libido doesn’t mean you can’t be ace/grey. Asexuality only really touches on attraction. And with the infrequentness of your attraction grey could be a decent descriptor. 

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MayflowerMonstress

1. I absolutely no clue, I didn't know what it was I just knew it felt good 

2.No the two times I have been attracted to people were around three years apart. I have absolutely no connection to the number three.

3. Basically third person standard vanilla stuff  (Though gay and lesbian stuff are frequent) 

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Athena32

I think that Gray could be a good label for you to try out, if you feel like you want a label. If you don't feel like you need a label, then don't feel like you have to get one: you'll be welcome here regardless. The nice thing about Gray-Ace is that there's wiggle room to discover who you are, and it doesn't really have an extremely set definition. You could also identify as A-spec, or asexual spectrum, or just questioning. 

I would suggest doing a little research, maybe looking around AVEN and seeing if any experiences resonate with you. The Gray-Ace forum might be particularly helpful. Also, feel free to come join us in the Teen Corner! (Asexual Musings and Rantings forum) 

 

Welcome to AVEN, and have some cake!

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LadyOracle

It is actually very common to masturbate a such a young age. I did so too from around the same age and thought it was weird until I read an article about it. Usually small kids just rub up against toys or something. Something accidentally touches their crotch, it feels good and they keep doing it, probably not even realising what they're doing most of the time.

 

I wouldn't say that has anything to do with your asexuality per se. 

 

Other than that I recognise most of your story. I don't really use the label or stick to ace to not confuse people more than necessary, but you could call me a sex-positive demiromantic gray ace with a low libido. And some people will say 'that's nonsense, you're just too demanding and you have sex so you're not ace' and then I think 'yeah sex is ok sometimes but can we just eat pizza?' and feel very comfy with my label. 

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LadyOracle
4 hours ago, mreid said:

I always touched my parts as part of personal hygiene or simply to explore, and never felt anything other than the normal feeling you get by touching any other part of your body. I actually never knew I was supposed to feel anything different until I looked up what masturbation was.

You're not _supposed_ to feel anything. It's common, not mandatory. 😉

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