Queenofhogwarts

Am I Grey?

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Queenofhogwarts

Okay, hi, everybody! Sorry if this is a long one. 

I experience sexual attraction. I'm kind of picky (at least I think I'm kind of picky) but I have felt sexual attraction for both celebrities and boys I've seen in real life. I even get sexually attracted to some naked men. I'm also into BDSM (I'm a dom type), and I like to masturbate and use a vibrator.

The thing is, though, I'm not really interested in full intercourse with another person. Anal and oral repel me, and penis vaginal penetration seems like it should be good since I like using a vibrator, but the thought usually doesn't really do anything for me. I get off a lot more by seeing a guy tied up or by just having him touch me down there. I want romantic interactions and relationships, but the most "sexual" contact I want to do is kissing, BDSM play, and some below the waist genital touching. I also prefer my BDSM porn to be fully clothed, which I know for a lot of people sort of defeats the purpose of porn. 

 I've always considered myself heterosexual, just an oddly prudish, yet kinky one, but ever since I started hearing about Grey-Sexuality, I've wondered if that's where I fit in to. It sounds sort of like it. However, there have been a few occasions when I felt sexual desire toward a boy. As in, I thought I might like to have solely vaginal penetration intercourse with him. It's only happened with 3 boys, though, and I'm not sure if I actually wanted it or if it was just me doing what was expected of someone sexual. Then there's the BDSM and the between the legs touching. All of that makes me wonder if I'm actually heterosexual or if I am grey.

So, what does it sound like? Do I sound grey, vaguely grey, or just an extremely picky heterosexual?

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AspieAlly613

The thing about grey areas is that there are different shades of grey.

 

You brought up BDSM, so I'll go ahead and make the corny and obvious joke:

 

There's gotta be at least 50 shades of grey out there.

 

*ducks to dodge the rotten tomatoes*

 

If you're not sure whether you're het or grey, you may be a lighter shad of grey than lots of the other shades of grey.

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Joe Guzman

I have to agree with AspieAlly613, but I'll avoid the tomatoes altogether. I'm a medium-dark ace myself (black being completely ace and white being het-sexual--unless I've got that backwards, in which case, sorry). I can get aroused, both by who I see online and IRL, but the desire to follow thru is next to nil the overwhelming majority of the time. And like you, I enjoy BDSM, though I'm on the lighter side of that. But that's more mental than physical, despite the physical manifestation of the acts. Genital touching in a BDSM context isn't necessarily sexual, either; it's part of the dom/sub who-can-do-what-to-who. 

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Queenofhogwarts

This is a link to a male enhancement drug. I am female. How does this have anything to do with me?

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