c0rter Posted July 23, 2018 Share Posted July 23, 2018 Hello everyone! My life has been super hectic and transformative lately, but hey isn't that what life is all about? Alright, so, background information: My name is Carter, I'm 22, I'm a woman, and I'm asexual. Weird, that was a lot easier to write than I thought it would be. Anyway! Sidetracked! I grew up knowing I was different. I was never really attracted to anyone. I started to date my boyfriend in high school, and at the time, he was actually she. He's trans, but didn't come out as trans until about our senior year. So anyway. Basically the whole school knew when we started dating, and we were like The Lesbian Couple™ of school. I was labeled a lesbian. And I thought it didn't seem quite right. I mean, clearly I'm into girls, because I was dating one. But I also felt like, I'm not just a lesbian. I felt equally "attracted" to boys. One day, I worked up all of my courage, and I told my boyfriend that I thought I was bi. He was fine with it, and he agreed, but it still didn't feel right. So I did some more digging, more research. I found out about pansexuality, and I was like yes! That's it! But, alas, I was wrong. So wrong. I mistook my lack of attraction to anyone, as being attracted to everyone. At this point, I knew about asexuality, but I never thought it applied to me. I just thought, well I don't like sex, but I'm attracted to people, but I don't like to look at people when I watch porn, but I do like porn, but I don't like being touched, but I like to imagine being touched. And I just had a back and forth constantly. Very recently, I started thinking about my sexuality again. My boyfriend and I haven't been having sex, mostly because whenever he tries, I brush him off, and I never initiate. I never tried to dig too deeply into it. But it was bothering me. Something just felt wrong, and I couldn't put my finger on it. Then I was on Quora and I read some posts about people who were asexual. And it was like a light going on. Duh. It's like so obvious, looking back. I can see all the instances of my past where my asexuality was trying to rise, and I just kept pushing it down. I thought maybe I just wasn't having the right type of sex yet, that maybe we'll experiment and then one day I'll like it. Nope! Sex is gross and I hate being touched and sex scenes make me uncomfortable and tbh, even just watching people kiss makes me feel awkward. So. I'm asexual! My journey isn't over, but I want a community, I want to be with people who relate. You will definitely see more from me! Link to post Share on other sites
JMichael Posted July 23, 2018 Share Posted July 23, 2018 Greetings! Link to post Share on other sites
Anthracite_Impreza Posted July 23, 2018 Share Posted July 23, 2018 Hello Link to post Share on other sites
NickyTannock Posted July 23, 2018 Share Posted July 23, 2018 Welcome to AVEN! Link to post Share on other sites
c0rter Posted July 23, 2018 Author Share Posted July 23, 2018 3 hours ago, RK800 said: Welcome! 2 hours ago, JMichael said: Greetings! 8 minutes ago, Anthracite_Impreza said: Hello Hello everyone!! Thanks for the welcome, and the cake! Link to post Share on other sites
Lichley Posted July 23, 2018 Share Posted July 23, 2018 Welcome! Hope I’m not too late to offer cake as well Link to post Share on other sites
Karst Posted July 24, 2018 Share Posted July 24, 2018 Welcome! It's great that you're figuring things out! Link to post Share on other sites
Homer Posted July 25, 2018 Share Posted July 25, 2018 Hi and welcome Thank you for signing up and sharing your story! You've come to the right place - a lot of people on here will be able to relate to your thoughts! In hindsight it always seems so obvious, doesn't it? It's great to read that you're coming to terms with your feelings. You may enjoy exploring the Asexual Relationships forums, where there are a lot of people with similar experiences. I hope you'll enjoy your time on here! Have some cake: Link to post Share on other sites
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