What would be important to you in your ACE relatioonship?

[Rupa]

🤔

Someone who:

 I can mess about with and sent silly photos to lol, but is also serious enough to have a mature conversation with.

 

Can take subtle hints or cues and doesn’t mind this, as I don’t like the idea of upsetting people and am generally quite indirect when trying to navigate something I don’t actually want/like to do, or if I’m feeling uncomfortable. Till I get more confidence anyway  

 

Understands life can be busy and is flexible with when to meet.

 

Is willing to come up with ideas of where to go to, somewhere new sometimes, rather than leaving it all to me to be proactive

 

Likes the outdoors enough to go camping or at least try it out 😛 and who can appreciate an animated film, cause I don’t watch many films but I’m studying to become a 3D animator so I do like to watch that kind of thing

 

Isn’t crazy mad about going to bars, clubs and gigs but is still happy to go with. So a nice balance basically?

[jiali]

Well ... After reading all the posts in this topic, I feel like I wanted to share mine also. This is my very first post in the forum. Sorry that if some of things are not related to this topic. 

 

I'm always been searching for a person who I can do everything together that we both are interested (cuz I hate to do things which I'm not interested and I don't want other person to do things without their interest) , travel together, doing adventurous and crazy things together, having many common interests that we can endlessly talk about. It's always been my Ideal relationship goals since I didn't know I'm asexual. My friends even said it's impossible to find who is very similar to myself. 

 

But they are wrong. Last year, I found that ideal person and of course I fell for that person. That's where I start questioning about my sexuality. Before, I'm not interested in anyone and haven't been in relationship and not interested to have one and don't even care what my sexuality is ( I always joked "I might like all or none", every times someone asked my sexuality), now I'm very confused. 

 

Now we are like best friends. We both are very interested in photography and go around the city and photographing or hunting for photography equipments. Sometimes we go hunting for antiques and old books. We love hanging around at cafes sometimes without even talking to each other and just doing our own businesses and just loving to keep each other company and spend time together (Well .. at least for me). Sometimes we go to art galleries and sometimes did some adventurous stuffs together like go photographing in old abandoned factories. We spend more times than normal friends would do. We had deep intimate discussions and fun talks too. We have many more common interests like loving antiques, architecture and history. I sometimes even feel like he's my other half i was searching for.

 

I never talked to him how I feel about him cuz I can't risk our friendship and I didn't want a romantic relationship anyway so I thought It's better not talk to him how i feel about him.  But as the friendship grow, I wanted to become closer (not sure i want a romantic relationship or not).

 

On 7/16/2018 at 2:08 AM, Kai99 said:

I want them to view me as their life partner. Marriage doesn't even have to be on the table, but I want us to be committed to one another. If I move, they move and vice versa. This isn't just a friendship that you say bye to after you move for job opportunity. We need to stick together and consider one another when making decisions. I don't think it would work if one person views the other as best friend. I want a strong desire to be together. No one sided partnership... and that is very common thing in todays relationships. I want random forehead kisses from them. I want to cuddle with them on the couch sometimes while watch television. I desire for them to hold my hand sometimes while walking. I want to be able to randomly attack them with back hugs and they do that to me( I like playful, just not so playful it gets annoying). I dont think I would like to cuddle in bed since I like to sleep a certain way, but I dont mind it every now and than. I want it to be an equal partnership. I want to be able to have deep discussions and arguments with them and us being level headed enough that we don't get too heated with one another. I also want us to give each other space when we need it.

But recently, I feel like I want some of that @Kai99 mentioned above. It's also very frustrating to see him with his partners and I becoming to see myself one-sided partnership and he see me as a friend. May be i wanted more. I'm so confusing at this moment and i don't know what to do. It seem so complicated.

[(NotSo)DirtyDiana]

I always say he has to be my best friend. I would like to watch movies with him a lot, which is what I did in my past relationship and I really miss lying in bed with someone, watching movie after movie. Maybe play video games even though I suck at games generally. And I want to go on dates! 50s diners, arcades and amusement parks, zoos, picnics... Some holidays to Paris, Rome, San Francisco, Tokyo and Seoul (now I'm really reaching into fantasy world!). Honestly, I'm not very inventive with my "ideal relationship," I just want the standard stuff that everybody does in relationships. I want to go to the cinema with him every week. Get ice cream. Browse the shops for DVDs and games to play together. Not a lot to ask? Sigh. 

 

Ideally I want to live with him and make a life with him, as partners. Marriage is a nice idea so I'd like a proposal a few years down the line, but just living together as partners sounds good to me. I want to share a bed, cuddle... actually, I might have to rethink that because I hate someone in my way in bed! Maybe sleep in separate rooms when the movies are finished... 

[Celyn: The Lutening]

9 hours ago, (NotSo)DirtyDiana said:

I want to share a bed, cuddle... actually, I might have to rethink that because I hate someone in my way in bed! Maybe sleep in separate rooms when the movies are finished...

I feel the exact same way re: bed arrangements. It's nice to have the option of sharing, or separate beds.