Jump to content

Concern for the rise of Incel


umbasa

Recommended Posts

Bronztrooper
3 minutes ago, Perspektiv said:

To me, just sounds like an insanely insecure male. More of a macho type, who always has to display their manliness or fear the revoking of their man cards.

 

That's more the type who'll brag about having sex all the time. Has to sound like a horndog at all times, or risk appearing like a "sissy". That's bad for man cards. Same guy in a club or bar, will catch you checking out his "woman", and he has to fight to defend her honor.

 

"Guess who'll be f-ng your girl, tonight?" would result in a shooting or stabbing, with a guy like this.

 

Aaaaaaand that's why I didn't last long in the clubbing scene or night life, in general.

 

A guy whistles at a woman I'm with, and I'm flattered. Maybe its just me. O_o

Ah, maybe it's just tricky for me to tell them apart because I don't really have much personal experience with incels (if any).  To me, it feels like those 2 groups can overlap pretty easily.

 

Never really understood all that macho BS.  Manliness and douchebaggery are so far apart that it's hard to imagine how people manage to think they're one and the same.

Link to post
Share on other sites
paperbackreader
On 6/9/2018 at 8:54 AM, umbasa said:

 Basically, on the umpteenth time of explaining to another person about what it means to be an asexual their reply was "Like that Incel?"

 

Now, that stopped me in my tracks. Dead. I then got a little angry but managed to compose myself. I had an immediate urge to spit out "fuck you" but thankfully I kept my mouth shut tight.

 

And so I've been thinking about this exchange for a couple of days now. I'm still not sure what to think of it. It's probably a one-off, very infuriating misunderstanding but I do worry if one person came to that assumption maybe more people will start to assume the same.

 

The way I see it, visibility of asexuals is already tough enough. But if the idea of "this group = no sex" becomes more attributed to Incel (since they make the news more and more), I do wonder if we won't be automatically dragged into their circle whenever the public sees, thinks or talks about asexuality. And what that might mean for our goals to be more visible and accepted.

I understand your concern of being looked down on by people who may generalise incels and asexuals together. I may be wrong but I guess for you that concern arises because you didn't want us to be seen as angry people willing to murder others.

 

I guess I take a dalai lama approach. Condemn the act, not the person. Explore feelings that may lead to that act. That anger you feel at being misunderstood? Imagine feeling like that, all the time. It has hurt you to be seen to be like them. How must it feel to always be them, or having to hide those feelings all the time, or be told they aren't valid, rather than to be given the tools to challenge how they approach life? 

 

Also, just needed to say that not all incels are entitled misogynistic men that are willing to blame everything but themselves, although I accept that there are those within that community that have those feelings. 

https://www.elle.com/culture/news/amp34512/woman-who-started-incel-movement/

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/11/2018 at 10:57 PM, Perspektiv said:

To me, just sounds like an insanely insecure male. More of a macho type, who always has to display their manliness or fear the revoking of their man cards.

 

That's more the type who'll brag about having sex all the time. Has to sound like a horndog at all times, or risk appearing like a "sissy". That's bad for man cards. Same guy in a club or bar, will catch you checking out his "woman", and he has to fight to defend her honor.

 

"Guess who'll be f-ng your girl, tonight?" would result in a shooting or stabbing, with a guy like this.

 

Aaaaaaand that's why I didn't last long in the clubbing scene or night life, in general.

 

A guy whistles at a woman I'm with, and I'm flattered. Maybe its just me. O_o

You feel flattered, the woman feels threatened. It's bad enough that the only way a girl can get a guy off her back by saying she has a boyfriend, (and sometimes that only works if said boyfriend is around). It'd be terrifying if that didn't stop the creeps from bothering her. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/11/2018 at 11:03 PM, Bronztrooper said:

Ah, maybe it's just tricky for me to tell them apart because I don't really have much personal experience with incels (if any).  To me, it feels like those 2 groups can overlap pretty easily.

 

Never really understood all that macho BS.  Manliness and douchebaggery are so far apart that it's hard to imagine how people manage to think they're one and the same.

They can overlap, in my opinion. Both think they deserve sex. They just think it for different reasons. One think he deserves it because, "It's literal torture for a guy to not have sex." And the other thinks he deserves it because, "I'm the coolest shit since sliced bread."

Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, FaerieFate said:

You feel flattered, the woman feels threatened. 

Some women love being hit on. I have dated several who did. Some even need it to feel beautiful.

 

Deliberately dressed racy, as they enjoyed most of the attention they would get.

 

Getting called sexy or whistled at, would get an ear to ear grin from them.

 

I even playfully called a few on it who wore dresses that covered half a butt cheek, taking about they went clubbing for the music.

 

That's like me reading Playboy for the articles.

 

If the girl I am with is gorgeous and is smiling at a compliment a guy is giving her, there is zero threat.

 

He's essentially complimented me on my taste in women indirectly.

 

I just fail to see a threat in being whistled at.

Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, Perspektiv said:

Some women love being hit on. I have dated several who did. Some even need it to feel beautiful.

 

Deliberately dressed racy, as they enjoyed most of the attention they would get.

 

Getting called sexy or whistled at, would get an ear to ear grin from them.

 

I even playfully called a few on it who wore dresses that covered half a butt cheek, taking about they went clubbing for the music.

 

That's like me reading Playboy for the articles.

 

If the girl I am with is gorgeous and is smiling at a compliment a guy is giving her, there is zero threat.

 

He's essentially complimented me on my taste in women indirectly.

 

I just fail to see a threat in being whistled at.

It's a bit like... instead of picturing pretty women whistling at you, imagine if you were walking down the street and a bunch of 7'8 linebackers started catcalling you.

 

Probably they won't do anything. Probably they just mean it as a compliment. But what if they get mad that you don't smile? What if they start following you down the street, shouting, "Hey baby? Where you going?"

 

They're bigger than you. They could hold you down with one hand. Sure, some girls love the attention they get on the street. But not all girls. Not even most girls. Because there's always that underlying fear.

 

There's that old saying, it really ties into the Inceldom thing well. "Men are afraid that women will laugh at them, women are afraid that men will kill them."

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Grimalkin said:

Not even most girls.

Correct, but there are still many girls who love the attention. Just like many guys love attention, and buy things that will get them the same level of it.

Same thing that will push a guy to hit a gym, and work on his upper body only, to look as built as possible so he can wear a muscle shirt in the club.

 

1 hour ago, Grimalkin said:

It's a bit like... instead of picturing pretty women whistling at you, imagine if you were walking down the street and a bunch of 7'8 linebackers started catcalling you.

I'd keep walking.

 

1 hour ago, Grimalkin said:

What if they start following you down the street, shouting, "Hey baby? Where you going?"

I'd have my hand on my pepper spray, taser or whatever weapon I had on me, and would politely decline his offer. The weapons would remain in my purse, as long as he kept himself in line.

 

I mean, I grew up in a bad neighborhood. You learned to defend yourself at a very young age, or get "marked". Once you're marked, it never ends.

 

These types of men are only tough around a crowd. She pulls out a loud alarm, and alerts her surroundings, and they'll bail.

 

Street smarts help you prevent some situations, but good old self-defense skills, will allow you to run away.

 

Maybe we grew up in different neighborhoods. Where I grew up, girls also learned to defend themselves (or get constantly picked on). You also learned very quickly, that showing an assailant any fear, made you marked by them. I've been able to walk away from having a gun and knives pulled on me, via showing zero fear, and keeping calmer than the would be attacker.

 

My sister was taught self-defense very young, and put her kids into self-defense classes, too.

 

I'm not saying there isn't a threat. I'm saying that in spite of this, that some women still love that level of attention.

 

If I have a daughter, I'm putting her in combat sports too, and she will break the nose of any guy who tries her.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I will be entirely blunt, it is the result of extremist Feminism, and some normal Feminist doctrine.

 

They raised expectations of relationships so high, and taught people to immediately drop anyone the moment they had anything negative about them. Being fiscally independant, also means sacrificing emotional needs. For men, it is easier. For women, it leads to more depression. Having both sexes work, makes neither happy. Because they have little time to spend together. The family structure has been dismantled. I personally, am glad I grew up in a strict Christian home. After seeing how miserable all my other peers are. 

 

There is no love, without effort. Love is all the times you didn't leave someone for a mistake. Not vice versa.

Link to post
Share on other sites
19 minutes ago, Malum said:

I will be entirely blunt, it is the result of extremist Feminism, and some normal Feminist doctrine.

 

They raised expectations of relationships so high, and taught people to immediately drop anyone the moment they had anything negative about them. Being fiscally independant, also means sacrificing emotional needs. For men, it is easier. For women, it leads to more depression. Having both sexes work, makes neither happy. Because they have little time to spend together. The family structure has been dismantled. I personally, am glad I grew up in a strict Christian home. After seeing how miserable all my other peers are. 

 

There is no love, without effort. Love is all the times you didn't leave someone for a mistake. Not vice versa.

Nah, man. Assholes gonna asshole.

 

Some of these people are lost and sad. Most are just hateful, awful people. Maybe they were born that way. Maybe it's Maybelline. But if they had their perfect home where their virgin wife bent to their every whim and will they'd still be terrible.

 

When you grow up in a Christian home, your parents and friends point out examples of people that don't work. "It's because of the modern age," they say. "Look how unhappy they are. Things would be better if it were more like the good old days, where men and women had specific roles to play and put God above all else." But they're not pointing out the happy "unconventional" families, of which there are many.

Link to post
Share on other sites
31 minutes ago, Grimalkin said:

Nah, man. Assholes gonna asshole.

 

Some of these people are lost and sad. Most are just hateful, awful people. Maybe they were born that way. Maybe it's Maybelline. But if they had their perfect home where their virgin wife bent to their every whim and will they'd still be terrible.

 

When you grow up in a Christian home, your parents and friends point out examples of people that don't work. "It's because of the modern age," they say. "Look how unhappy they are. Things would be better if it were more like the good old days, where men and women had specific roles to play and put God above all else." But they're not pointing out the happy "unconventional" families, of which there are many.

You have to ask yourself, what made these men lost and sad? I would respond with SJW politics. There are no proper paths for men. Especially white men, who get shafted by affirmative action. Have to meet impossible demands of feminism, and meet physical demands they have no control over to be even considered a possible partner. Society turned them into assholes. Seeing them cry out in frustration is all the proof you really need. But people ignore them. As no matter who is in power, there are always those at the bottom and top. Feminists rearranged that intentionally. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, Malum said:

You have to ask yourself, what made these men lost and sad? I would respond with SJW politics. There are no proper paths for men. Especially white men, who get shafted by affirmative action. Have to meet impossible demands of feminism, and meet physical demands they have no control over to be even considered a possible partner. Society turned them into assholes. Seeing them cry out in frustration is all the proof you really need. But people ignore them. As no matter who is in power, there are always those at the bottom and top. Feminists rearranged that intentionally.  

What made these men lost and sad is that they weren't getting any sex, probably because of their personalities, and they decided the best way to deal with this was to spend all day on the forums posting things like "rape isn't really that bad" and "the government should provide us with virgins." So as you can see, their personalities aren't improving. Which leads to still no sex.

 

It's not women's fault that these guys can't put a lid on their unChristian-like behavior long enough to form a meaningful relationship with someone.

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Grimalkin said:

What made these men lost and sad is that they weren't getting any sex, probably because of their personalities, and they decided the best way to deal with this was to spend all day on the forums posting things like "rape isn't really that bad" and "the government should provide us with virgins." So as you can see, their personalities aren't improving. Which leads to still no sex.

 

It's not women's fault that these guys can't put a lid on their unChristian-like behavior long enough to form a meaningful relationship with someone.

This is a very gynocentric view, that blatantly disregards the biological make up of males. You are speaking in a very emotional tone, with no real basis in fact. This makes me wonder if you get your ideas about men on social media like Reddit or 4chan.

 

Most cis men, are more biologically physical lovers by design. Most females, are  emotional lovers by design. Then you have the outliers. This is why most women generally seek long term relationships; and Men fluctuate more. It is not uncommon for men to have multiple partners, before they choose to settle down.

 

Feminism, has made gynocentric views the norm in society. Then they have properly shut down any complaints from men. This isn't even about rape, or personalities. It is about basic human needs, which are promptly skewed for ulterior motives, and demonized. It is misandry. I am honestly offended by some of the things you have said too. 

 

Sexual relationships are generally very simple. Man provides for the family, female provides a sexual partner and legacy. That is the entire point of a relationships at its most natural core. The only other aspect possible, is emotional needs which came about entirely from human intelligence, and is rather a very new thing in human society. It is not exactly natural, but humans tend to violate some natural things all the time due to our intelligence. This doesn't make the biological urges, and sense of fulfillment any different. 

 

Most cis men need sex to feel emotionally confident, and healthy. This is seen throughout the animal kingdom. Without it, they lose their purpose in life, or go through drastic changes in personality for the worst. Most not as emotionally capable as females in this situation, so are far more susceptible to things like suicide and taking their anger out on society. Which suicide statistics, and things like shootings greatly reflect this natural order being violated. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Bronztrooper

I want to both drop in my 2 cents on the current discussion and stay out of it at the same time.

 

Decisions, decisions...

Link to post
Share on other sites

Let me clarify a few things. Men are not bad. Men who are lonely are not bad. Men who feel as though they need sex to be fulfilled are not bad. None of these things are inherently bad.

 

Going on the internet and posting about how you want to have sex with your thirteen year old niece? That's bad. Thinking you have a right to sex is bad. Running people over with a van because you aren't getting any is bad.

 

The Incel community lets lonely men get together to talk, which is theoretically good. But in practice, much like any extremist movement, the louder, more willful people rope the vulnerable newbies in and drip hate into their ears. The community fosters hate for women, hate for each other, hate for themselves. It's not healthy, and it's why (besides lack of sexual attraction =/= wanting sex but not having it) asexuals don't want to be confused with Incels. Because even if at the core the group is supposed to be a good thing, it's become a terrible place to be.

Link to post
Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry

I think something more fundamental lies at the root of the problem: a person who thinks a wrong has been done to them (real or imagined), is a potentially dangerous person. When larger numbers of people believe the same wrong has been done to them, it just becomes a bigger problem.

 

But I also think something that fuels the problem of incels is the whole competitive aspect which some people have applied to having sex. As asexuals, we're most likely to dismiss it for the BS that it is, but incels eat it up. Taking away the competitive element from sex would pretty much cut the legs out from under the whole incel phenomenon.

Link to post
Share on other sites

A lot of guys who cannot get a girlfriend, it's not because of money or looks or whatever, they have poor social skills and go act like jerks toward women and women avoid them and they get mad at women for avoiding them.  They need to learn better manners and better behavior, take a bath, put on a clean shirt, comb their hair, then I'm sure they would do better in life.

Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, thylacine said:

They need to learn better manners and better behavior, take a bath, put on a clean shirt, comb their hair, then I'm sure they would do better in life.

That's likely part of their problem. Their entitlement, blinds them to the changes they need to make within themselves, in order to be successful.

 

Kind of like that employee we all know or have experienced, that does nothing to earn a raise, but is highly entitled to it. Would literally feel snubbed, not getting one.

 

Piling all of the blame on the rejection from women, sort of showcases they aren't self-aware enough to grow or change.

Link to post
Share on other sites

US late on this trend? ;-)
We've got a group of people calling themselves "Absolute Beginners" since the late 90ties here in Germany.: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absolute_Beginners
They did get some media attention with a peak probably about 10 years ago but aren't spoken of much nowadays.

Link to post
Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry
16 hours ago, thylacine said:

A lot of guys who cannot get a girlfriend, it's not because of money or looks or whatever, they have poor social skills and go act like jerks toward women and women avoid them and they get mad at women for avoiding them.  They need to learn better manners and better behavior, take a bath, put on a clean shirt, comb their hair, then I'm sure they would do better in life.

Or, like me, they may have Asperger's, in which case they'll find having to learn all these rules of dating etiquette to be emotionally draining with little or no payoff. It's one thing to keep oneself groomed and always be polite, it's quite another to give off a vibe that you're not even aware of which women find off-putting.

 

But things even out. Nobody likes being rejected, so in a way it's good that women never approach me. I see a lot of women every day who are very smart and good-looking, at least to me... but I doubt the overwhelming majority would be a good partner for me, so I don't make any conscious efforts to flirt or hit on them.

Link to post
Share on other sites
paperbackreader

Sigh. There's so much projection about what people who join the incel community are - that they're all white men, they're all people that universally think they're entitled to sex, that either "the few loudest people that drip evil in to the vulnerable ears" or "the most vulnerable / gullible then follow them", that men who can't get a partner when they want one are either jerks / socially inept, that their rise has been in part fueled by political correctness gone mad, and the lack of opportunities... 

 

In part, incel is a hot topic because of the fear and disgust it has generated through 2 people's actions. Some people fear their culture is spreading, and with it, more violence. Others fear to be labeled in the same way. Nobody talks about their inherent humanity - at the end of the day, these are people with hopes, dreams, and desires (albeit expressed in a way that is unacceptable to most of us) to be participative, acceptable, acknowledged, respected human beings with somewhere to belong.

 

Sure, I find it hard to accept most of their ideologies. I don't condone violence, nor do I identify with a lot of the canon. I'm almost a 100% incel antithesis. But I feel a bit like I'm watching 20 kids pointing and laughing at a little kid that's managed to shit in his pants accidentally. Sure, it's horrendous that he's shat in his pants, and maybe he's not learnt how to use a toilet yet, or maybe he has a medical condition, or maybe he thinks that's OK to do - but whatever it is - surely you'd be looking out for the guy and taking him to the bathroom or calling the teacher rather than sit around pointing behind his back and discussing how disgusting he smells?

 

So the question is, ladies and gents, what are you going to do about it? How many of you have actually taken time to /listen/ and understand to an incel? How many of you knows what it feels like, and why they believe what they do? What do you think might help curb their maladaptive logic, and help society become better? 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, paperbackreader said:

So the question is, ladies and gents, what are you going to do about it? How many of you have actually taken time to /listen/ and understand to an incel? How many of you knows what it feels like, and why they believe what they do? What do you think might help curb their maladaptive logic, and help society become better? 

That's kind of expecting ordinary people to 1) listen to the usual stuff incels say, most of which is mysogynistic, and 2) be a counselor to them.  

Link to post
Share on other sites

I can understand some elements on incels worldview. They argue that being male is hell, because it is hard for some males to find a love, a partner . So I can feel their pain, but this pain is not excuse for radical worldview and crimes. A lot of these guys need support from good therapist.  Sex offenders also have similar cognitive distorstion, they are lonely, socially inept, but it is possible to rehabilitate  them. Also they sould decrease their feixation on sexuality. Life is more than sex, it is possible to live without sex and be happy. They also need to understand that being female can be  very difficult, they should develop empathy to females. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh incels... i have a few thoughts about them.

first they do concern me especially in a public safety aspect such as what happened in Toronto recently or of course Elliot Rodgers ( though i think its a combination of both the incel ideology and mental health issues) i know there were other instances but they do concern me yes but at the same time no ?

besides public safety since some incels actually injured and killed people because of their anger of no one wanting to have sex with them. i just feel they're basically a group of losers (i hate saying it but i'm being truthful here) that are mad because no girl feels attracted to them romantically and sexually and they take rejection to the next level compared to everyone else.

i am slightly concerned on people mistaking us as incels when really we asexuals/greys/demisexuals etc perceive or don't want sex unless special circumstances and asexuals ? not at all but of course ignorant people will be ignorant so we gotta have each others back to help and support one another on that

on a personal level ? i do worry for my sisters in case some guy likes them and they reject them and the guy goes off on them over not accepting them... if a incel lashes out to my sisters or even female friends ? they'll have a "talk" with me over their horrible behavior

other than that, i don't know. i would say don't pay attention to them for the most part but if they're gonna be more vocal and the worse of the incels will commit crimes ? then there's a problem. but for the most part just let em be for the most part.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Bronztrooper
27 minutes ago, texpika96 said:

on a personal level ? i do worry for my sisters in case some guy likes them and they reject them and the guy goes off on them over not accepting them... if a incel lashes out to my sisters or even female friends ? they'll have a "talk" with me over their horrible behavior

I'm honestly the same way about my sister.  We stayed in Myrtle Beach for a couple of nights before finally moving in with an old friend of my dad's a couple of weeks ago and I decided to go for a walk, and my sister wanted to go with me.  We went together and it was night out, but the lights on the street kept everything lit up (we made sure to stay on the main road).  Now, the thing is, my sister is around 5 feet tall and weighs less than 100lbs (not that she hasn't tried to gain some weight), so I think you can figure out how dangerous things could be for her if she had gone on her own.

 

During that walk, some guy catcalled at her while driving past.  My sister apparently didn't hear what he said, but I did.  I just pretended that I didn't so that she wouldn't worry or feel uncomfortable.  Then, on the way back, I decided to walk on the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street because I figured that I may as well get some distance onto my Pokemon Go and there were PokeStops on that side of the street.  While we were walking, I kept looking over to my sister to make sure that she was alright.  At one point, a guy walked past her and right away turned his her to look at her ass.  She had turned her head to look at him and I think that when he noticed that she saw him, he looked away.  There's no doubt in my mind that my sister knew what the guy was looking at (she's 17 and that guy looked to be in his 30s, so...), but she never brought it up to me.  Guys like that make me feel uncomfortable for my sister's sake.

 

And the violent incels?  .... I don't even want to think about it.

Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, Bronztrooper said:

I'm honestly the same way about my sister.  We stayed in Myrtle Beach for a couple of nights before finally moving in with an old friend of my dad's a couple of weeks ago and I decided to go for a walk, and my sister wanted to go with me.  We went together and it was night out, but the lights on the street kept everything lit up (we made sure to stay on the main road).  Now, the thing is, my sister is around 5 feet tall and weighs less than 100lbs (not that she hasn't tried to gain some weight), so I think you can figure out how dangerous things could be for her if she had gone on her own.

 

During that walk, some guy catcalled at her while driving past.  My sister apparently didn't hear what he said, but I did.  I just pretended that I didn't so that she wouldn't worry or feel uncomfortable.  Then, on the way back, I decided to walk on the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street because I figured that I may as well get some distance onto my Pokemon Go and there were PokeStops on that side of the street.  While we were walking, I kept looking over to my sister to make sure that she was alright.  At one point, a guy walked past her and right away turned his her to look at her ass.  She had turned her head to look at him and I think that when he noticed that she saw him, he looked away.  There's no doubt in my mind that my sister knew what the guy was looking at (she's 17 and that guy looked to be in his 30s, so...), but she never brought it up to me.  Guys like that make me feel uncomfortable for my sister's sake.

 

And the violent incels?  .... I don't even want to think about it.

Oh my God... that is awful . 😕 yes i can understand that for her height and weight ? it will definitely be dangerous for your sister. i understand what you're saying and you feel the same as i do regarding with our sisters. there are a lot of terrible men out there that prey on girls either way they desire and i'm glad you went with her, heaven knows what would happen if she went alone, especially in Myrtle Beach, SC like any city really. 

I hate catcalling, any man that does that to a woman is scum in my eye and i never done that to any female , ever!  btw glad to see a fellow Pokemon GO player, i play it sometimes myself, just stating that now, i'll get back to topic

That man whoever he is is a scumbag and considering he is probably in his 30s while your sister is still in high school , 17 years of age ? ugh he already done something illegal but i wanna ask, do you think that guy is the same one that catcalled her while driving away ? considering in your eyes he seemed to be 30 something and the person that was looking at her ass is also probably 30 something, do you think its the same man ? because if he has a fix on your sister ? that isn't good and her she is at risk by that guy if he's really into her.

My advice is to always be around your sister when you and her are hanging out, that's what i do with my older and younger sister ( they're 27 and 21 btw though the 27 year old moved to Lovington, NM so i hope family there are taking care of her anyway)  and always keep an eye out on people, especially other males . so i'll say it if that guy comes back and catcalls her or worse ? get the police on the guy for your sister's safety. you never know what he may be up to next, i hope the guy isn't the same as the one that drove away and catcalled her but if anything happens ? do something, anything, if her safety is at threat ? get the cops. I hope everything is ok now though but just keep a close eye and take care of your sister. i'm glad she is alright though felt uncomfortable and i don't blame her for that. i just hope nothing else happens after what happened there. 😕

and same i don't wanna think about the violent incels.. lets say if they hurt my sisters and even friends ? as much i hate to be violent but i'll defend them anyway i can and especially get police involved.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Most men are told at a young age, if you bathe, work out, and have a decent job. You will get a girlfriend. They were never told, that some people won't get a girlfriend.

 

It is where the "Virgin vs Chad" meme emerged from to point out this dynamic.

 

This dynamic isn't the same for women. Any woman, no matter how unfavorable etc. Can get a boyfriend, and is entirely based on standard. So incel is exclusively male. Another term for them is a "Robot".

 

For men, no matter how much effort they put into looks, personality, work. They have a chance of never getting a girlfriend, not even a low standard one. While women can get a partner very easy, with little effort.

 

The advice people give incels, are also terrible. Women will always say "Just be yourself" while good looking men just say "Get fit" to incels. None of this incorperates the fact some might have incurable acne. Some might have deformed heads or faces. Some might be very short. You get the idea. Some people are just screwed genetically. They have zero control over it. So this advice just pisses them off.

 

Then you ask yourself "what about personality?". While this works for some, appearance is a deal breaker 90% of the time. Women do not date "nice guys". They date what incels refer to as "Chad", and the women who date Chads are called "Stacy". Both which refers to the ideal relationship partner that everyone wants. (Fit, beautiful, tall, blonde etc)

 

This situation leads to internalized hatred, and dislike of social/sexual darwinism. They blame women for preferring Chad, over a smarter or nicer person. They are aware that they are being openly mysoginist, because they know women will try to be sympathetic/empathetic to them. This keeps them at bay, and only the truly dedicated sympathizers can break through to them and find out they are rather normal humans. 

 

It is more like a mental illness, like avoidance personality disorder. Rather than a belief. Incel should be treated like normal people, who use insults to keep people away as they self depricate, self harm, and strew in their own self hatred. Only kindness and consideration from the opposite sex can really help them. None of this crap about calling them sexists rapists. That just throws gasoline on a fire that can lead to shootings.

 

This is a very personal subject for me, as many of my friends online would be considered Incels. I know how they think.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Bronztrooper
21 hours ago, texpika96 said:

Oh my God... that is awful . 😕 yes i can understand that for her height and weight ? it will definitely be dangerous for your sister. i understand what you're saying and you feel the same as i do regarding with our sisters. there are a lot of terrible men out there that prey on girls either way they desire and i'm glad you went with her, heaven knows what would happen if she went alone, especially in Myrtle Beach, SC like any city really. 

I hate catcalling, any man that does that to a woman is scum in my eye and i never done that to any female , ever!  btw glad to see a fellow Pokemon GO player, i play it sometimes myself, just stating that now, i'll get back to topic

That man whoever he is is a scumbag and considering he is probably in his 30s while your sister is still in high school , 17 years of age ? ugh he already done something illegal but i wanna ask, do you think that guy is the same one that catcalled her while driving away ? considering in your eyes he seemed to be 30 something and the person that was looking at her ass is also probably 30 something, do you think its the same man ? because if he has a fix on your sister ? that isn't good and her she is at risk by that guy if he's really into her.

My advice is to always be around your sister when you and her are hanging out, that's what i do with my older and younger sister ( they're 27 and 21 btw though the 27 year old moved to Lovington, NM so i hope family there are taking care of her anyway)  and always keep an eye out on people, especially other males . so i'll say it if that guy comes back and catcalls her or worse ? get the police on the guy for your sister's safety. you never know what he may be up to next, i hope the guy isn't the same as the one that drove away and catcalled her but if anything happens ? do something, anything, if her safety is at threat ? get the cops. I hope everything is ok now though but just keep a close eye and take care of your sister. i'm glad she is alright though felt uncomfortable and i don't blame her for that. i just hope nothing else happens after what happened there. 😕

and same i don't wanna think about the violent incels.. lets say if they hurt my sisters and even friends ? as much i hate to be violent but i'll defend them anyway i can and especially get police involved.

We're no longer in the Myrtle Beach area (about an hour drive away from where we're at atm), but I've also never really lived in a city so hearing catcalling feels a bit... odd.

 

I never did say what the guy in the car looked like age-wise, but I'm pretty damn sure that it wasn't the same guy that looked at her ass.

 

My sister is almost always with someone when she goes somewhere, so there isn't much risk for her- though, the area we're at right now is 90% back roads, so there's not really much reason to go outside.

 

Yeah, I'm the same way, though, odds are that my dad would be first in line.  And I can't say that there would be much to find when he's done.

Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, Malum said:

Only kindness and consideration from the opposite sex can really help them.

They don't want kindness and consideration from the opposite sex: They Want SEX from the opposite sex.  They believe they're entitled to sex, period.  

 

What would help them is if they drop their over-inflated ego and learn that no one is entitled to sex, attention, conversation or even kindness from anyone.  

Link to post
Share on other sites
SorryNotSorry

Instead of tormenting incels, I'd want ALL of them to have life-like, robotic romantic partners.

Link to post
Share on other sites
31 minutes ago, vega57 said:

They don't want kindness and consideration from the opposite sex: They Want SEX from the opposite sex.  They believe they're entitled to sex, period.  

 

What would help them is if they drop their over-inflated ego and learn that no one is entitled to sex, attention, conversation or even kindness from anyone.  

Lashing out defensively and nihilistically doesn't usually mean they are narcassistic.

 

Women need to accept the fact most men want sex, more than their personality. That is the biggest miscommunication here. Of couse no sane man would admit this, because that ruins the illusion men create to win over women. There are men good at this illusion, and some are not. That is the biggest seperation between an incel and chad. 

 

Inb4 outliers.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...