Gatekeeping Questions

[the-spaceace]

I'm 21 and hopefully this doesn't get totally overlooked, but I hope to be presenting a panel in September at a queer conference with my university. I wanted to discuss the issue of gatekeeping and how reevaluating the sexual identity from the standpoint of an asexual individual can help people better understand how harmful gatekeeping in our community can be. Now, I know I'm young and I have had a few personal experiences with gatekeeping, but I was hoping that I could get quotes/personal stories/etc. from the older queer community about their own experiences or opinions on gatekeeping. I can quote anonymously if it is desired, I was just hoping that I could get something along these lines to help get my point across to the panel.

 

Thank you!

[4108bn]

I'm not sure I have a really solid grasp on this for myself in the context of my relationships, but I found this thread on the forum that might help out somewhat with what you're looking for, notably the initial post.

Following this, and hopefully, this will gain some more traction! I may come back if I see or realize anything pertinent.

[arowace]

Do you mean gate keeping in the LGBT community? I'm younger than you so I'm not sure how helpful I'll be but I have heard quite a few things... like: "Asexuality is more like a preference. It shouldn't be part of lgbt. It shouldn't even be an orientation" and, the ever present argument "Aces don't experience systematic oppression so they don't belong here"

[AngryAbrosexualPanromantic]

I've had a few experiences with gatekeeping, like many non-LG queers, I've been told I have no place in LGBTQ spaces, and that I'm not actually gay, but this is mostly from straight people (surprised much?). I once got told by a bisexual boy in a real-life LGBT space to get out, because I was in a straight phase (I'm abrosexual). I've also been told on AVEN that I shouldn't be on this website because I'm not ace/aro. I've also been repeatedly told (by straight, cisgender people mostly) that there are only 2 genders, but I'm not out about being non binary (I'm questioning right now, but I'm sort of Genderflux), so those comments aren't directed specifically at me.

 

The most common gatekeeping I see within the LGBTQ community is towards asexuals. Particularly aromantic or heteroromantic asexuals. I'm sorry, but I don't have any personal stories about this. I've also seen cisgender queers say transgender and nonbinary people aren't part of the LGBTQ community (I really want to know what they think the 'T' stands for), and that queers in hetero relationships shouldn't be at pride. 

 

I'm sorry I couldn't be more useful.

[Karst]

Personally, I think that, as well as discussing acephobic gatekeeping, you should really bring up the issue of bisexuality not being considered valid, even within the queer community. That's a surprisingly common prejudice. Bi folks tend to get written off as being indecisive or confused.

(Sorry if this wasn't helpful.)

[jay williams]

On ‎7‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 5:33 PM, Ardoise said:

Personally, I think that, as well as discussing acephobic gatekeeping, you should really bring up the issue of bisexuality not being considered valid, even within the queer community. That's a surprisingly common prejudice. Bi folks tend to get written off as being indecisive or confused.

(Sorry if this wasn't helpful.)

I am bisexual. I am, and perhaps always I have been, confused. But I do not see why that should write me or anyone else off. I think that a lot of people are indecisive or confused. Does not make them bad persons!