Janus DarkFox

The sadness of living without sex - BBC

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Janus DarkFox

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-44143003

 

A BBC article of a number of personal stories of living without sex.

 

Although poorly titled, not all stories here are sad, negative or regretful, but are likely edited to feel like it is.

 

There's a mention of Asexuality though it’s a little unusual to me, could relate to many people. 

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Nowhere Girl

The title really makes me angry.

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Miss Anne Thrope
6 minutes ago, Nowhere Girl said:

The title really makes me angry.

This article isn't about asexuals. It's a collection of first hand accounts of people who are still virgins at 40 or older/haven't had sexual contact in several years but who wish they could have such a relationship in their life. For them, life without sex is sad and upsetting, and that's understandable. It's made even worse for them by the fact that the world mocks and dehumanizes people like them.

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Masterman

While I agree the title might make sense in context, it's still a bit offensive on a broader scope.

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scarletlatitude

That was not a good call on BBC's part. Terrible title. 

 

But I can see what they were doing. The stories are (mostly) about people who WANT to have sex, but for various reasons have not. That would be "sad", if you want something but can never get it. I am sure people in that situation like to read others' stories to see that they are not alone.

 

They could have had a better title though, for sure.

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JDP
1 hour ago, Miss Anne Thrope said:

people who are still virgins at 40 or older/haven't had sexual contact in several years but who wish they could have such a relationship in their life.

Yeah, that's exactly what they need -- pity.

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Apostle

Baffles me why the BBC never contacted me. I haven't had sex for 25 years, being married to an asexual.

Journalism is not populated by particularly talented people these days hence the headline grabbing title. Many local journalist around my area are quite ignorant on English grammar and the written word. 

That to me is quite sad as well!

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OptimisticPessimist

I’m getting an error link, perhaps it’s been taken down?

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Masterman

It's the second time today I've heard about this article. Apparently, it's quite famous, and it worries me a lot.

 

Maybe Aven should write to the BBC and ask them to write a companion piece about the other side of the coins? Those of us who don't want sex, but are still unhappy because of how difficult it's to find people who are accepting (not to say sharing) of one's lifestyle?

 

Maybe help spread asexuality's visibility banking on this article's popularity?

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member1246

I don't see any problem with the article. If sex is something you want in your life, not having that type of human connection can be very sad and leave a person feeling defective at a basic human level.

 

Also this appears to be a companion article to an episode of a programme on BBC Radio that @Telecaster68 posted about recently.

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Deblano

Prior to me discovering that I am likely a "grey asexual", these kinds of articles would have absolutely gnawed at me and reinforced my previous fears that I was secretly a broken, depressed lunatic. 

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Janus DarkFox
1 hour ago, OptimisticPessimist said:

Updated the link in Thread, posted through Mobile Safari for thread creation so links might have been not totally compatible.

1 hour ago, CBC said:

Also this appears to be a companion article to an episode of a programme on BBC Radio that @Telecaster68 posted about recently.

If true then that's a bit unfortunate for the BBC to turn what could have been highly positive sexless experiences into a totally negative one.

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Rynn

I don't see this article as undermining asexuals' experiences in any way. The article was meant to share a handful of people's perceptions about their own lack of sexual activity. It wasn't meant to account for every perception about sex. Many sexual people feel isolated, judged, or deprived if they do not have sex, so of course that happened to be the main theme of the article. I don't think the title or the content is offensive to aces, or that the BBC should add some sort of companion piece/addendum to mention that sometimes people prefer not to have sex.

 

The BBC has several other articles that reference asexuality. They are fairly inclusive of aces. I don't think they need to advocate for asexuality in this specific artlcle.

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DoYouUnderstand

I read the article and just don't understand what the problem is. I just don't feel human at all, because things like this are such a big deal to everyone, but mean nothing at all to me.

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Janus DarkFox
20 hours ago, DoYouUnderstand said:

I read the article and just don't understand what the problem is. I just don't feel human at all, because things like this are such a big deal to everyone, but mean nothing at all to me.

Yeah, along with the general social world, romance,sexuality and gender in relation to the social world go totally over my head and mean nothing to me either.

 

Likely due to slightly more being Autistic than Asexual, Agender, (probable) Aromanticism for me maybe.

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