On Chesil Beach

[Philip027]

On 5/27/2018 at 8:12 PM, Telecaster68 said:

I'm honestly a bit shocked at how so many people think it's fine to avoid the subject even though it's causing great distress to their partner. 

You can broach the subject just fine (as long as it hasn't just been done repeatesly over and over already, then it's just gotten tiresome and is not likely to do any good no matter what approach you try).  I just don't see how doing it with a film like this is going to do anything but put the ace on the defensive and make things more awkward than they possibly already were.  I already gave my reasons why so I'm not rehashing that again.

[briones]

I finally saw this movie today (yep, it's still playing in UK theatres) and wanted to add my two cents. I read the book many years ago, before I identified as ace, and really disliked it as a teenager, but hey! A movie with a potential ace character....that's pretty rare.

 

It was interesting and intense at parts, with some *very* awkward sex scenes, so some aces might not feel comfortable with that. Saoirse Ronan did an excellent job portraying a possibly ace character. The many timelines made the narrative a bit confusing and the flashbacks made it lose some of its emotional impact. It felt like they dragged the ending out and changed it from the book's original's ending, if I recall correctly. Some spoilers if you're interested...

 

Spoiler

 

I personally thought that the two main characters were relatively compatible, but sex and lack of communication ruined their relationship. I think aces would be able to relate to Florence's suggestion that they could still live together as a couple and do everything as a couple... except have sex. She wants a romantic, nonsexual relationship but he's free to sleep with other women. He finds this insulting, disgusting, against their marriage vows, and not at all what he signed up for when they married - he basically thinks she owes him sex. UGH.

 

Unlike one of the other posters, I thought Florence genuinely loved him and from Edward's perspective later in the film, it's a little puzzling why she ended up marrying the ugly cellist who is more assertive than Edward. She was intrigued by Edward because he seemed like a kinder, more attentive option. I think in the book she ended up having career success but never marries.

 

The movie's ending feels more mysterious (she marries the cellist and has three children) - it proves she is able to have sex, but probably finds being intimate with the cellist easier than being close to Edward. That's extra painful for Edward. But it does call into question her original inclination to have a sexless marriage. I think the original ending makes it more obvious that she CAN'T compromise.

 

Anyway, maybe it would have worked out if they were a little older, had more relationship experience, and were more able to listen to each other's concerns. They were young; she kept withdrawing and he kept losing his temper. Besides their arguments about sex, they seemed to genuinely enjoy each other's company, though they came from different backgrounds and had different interests. It was a decent adaptation and I found it more interesting than the novel.

 

 

[Traveler40]

So, I finally saw this movie.  Beyond being a general yawn fest and difficult to follow at times, there were only a couple of poignant moments.  Frankly, I thought it was a waste of time and poorly done.

 

 

Spoiler

The only scenes that stood out:

 

Florence finally gives an emotional speech after their failed attempt at consummating their union.  She essentially indicates that she’s asexual, will never have sex with him and will gladly allow him an open marriage in lieu (the movie hints her asexuality may be born from abuse).  Shortly thereafter, they proceed to walk away from each other and any form of a life together.

 

Flash forward, we find out she remarried and has children leaving the audience with obvious questions....

 

Flash further forward, and we see what appears to be sadness when their paths cross at what was....I did not read it as sadness for what could have been.

[glyders]

I read the book years ago, before my ace partner came out and before I was diagnosed ASD. Very painful but well worth having read as it was so beautifully written.

She wouldn't read it, so I doubt she'd go to the film.