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I Don't Know What I Am


alexander2017

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alexander2017

So I'm 19 and ever since I was around 8, I thought that I was gay, but recently I started actually doing stuff with guys, and I just feel gross and kinda disgusted the whole time I am doing it. Like even the romantic/not sexual stuff. I love porn, nudes, and the thought of it all and can get off to that, but actually doing anything makes me feel nasty. With girls,  I only like them as friends. All this that's happened has made me think maybe I'm asexual, but I'm not sure because I still get off to like porn and the thought of it and like I've always dreamt of falling in love and marrying a man, but I don't know how that's gonna happen when I don't enjoy dating or sex or anything. Could I maybe be asexual?

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You could also just be aromantic, so you don't want a relationship even if you are homosexual.

 

But you could also be asexual but just get off to porn. Many asexuals masturbate. The question would be if you feel you are sexually attracted to those in the porn/nudes/so forth, or do you just focus on the acts?

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alexander2017
51 minutes ago, Puck said:

You could also just be aromantic, so you don't want a relationship even if you are homosexual.

 

But you could also be asexual but just get off to porn. Many asexuals masturbate. The question would be if you feel you are sexually attracted to those in the porn/nudes/so forth, or do you just focus on the acts?

 

I do feel sexually attracted to them, and the acts.

I get like crushes and romantic feelings, and have kind of had long distance relationships and enjoyed those, but dates and relationships in person weren't enjoyable to me and I just wanted to leave the whole time because I felt gross.

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cutiepastels
On 5/16/2018 at 7:32 AM, alexander2017 said:

I do feel sexually attracted to them, and the acts.

I get like crushes and romantic feelings, and have kind of had long distance relationships and enjoyed those, but dates and relationships in person weren't enjoyable to me and I just wanted to leave the whole time because I felt gross.

sounds like you are asexual

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