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How old was you when you figuerd out your sexuality??


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I have only just figured out I am panromantic I am 23 years old though isnt that a bit late to be discovering myself?

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I was about 17 when I figured out I was asexual. It's not too late - many people have discovered their sexuality even later than that.

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The Gnat (Natalie)

I didn't figure out I was asexual until right around my 21st birthday, and it was still another couple months before I realized I was demiromantic, so, no, that's not too late

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Just now, The Gnat (Natalie) said:

I didn't figure out I was asexual until right around my 21st birthday, and it was still another couple months before I realized I was demiromantic, so, no, that's not too late

I am still not  sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ?

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4 minutes ago, Mike-95 said:

I am still not  sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ?

You could call yourself demi-panromantic.

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The Gnat (Natalie)
1 minute ago, Mike-95 said:

I am still not  sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ?

Demi-panromantic. Pan/bi/homo/hetero/etc. describes what sex you're attracted to. Ace/demi/grey/allo/etc. describes the degree or frequency of attraction. They go together. Allosexual people just don't (typically) include the prefix because it's assumed that people are allosexual until stated otherwise.

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2 minutes ago, The Gnat (Natalie) said:

Demi-panromantic. Pan/bi/homo/hetero/etc. describes what sex you're attracted to. Ace/demi/grey/allo/etc. describes the degree or frequency of attraction. They go together. Allosexual people just don't (typically) include the prefix because it's assumed that people are allosexual until stated otherwise.

I dont think I have ever been close enough to someone before to find out if I am demi or not. only time will tell I guess

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I was 20 (this was last June) when I figured it out. My problem was that I never knew that there was a word to describe what I felt or that it was even a sexual orientation

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SomeoneWhoLikesPizza

14, discovered it existed about 3 weeks ago and 2 weeks later I was pretty sure I’m ace. I’m now thinking about my romantic orientation (grey-romantic until further notice).

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knittinghistorian

I think it can take an especially long time for ace people, because there isn't a sudden "I want sex!" moment.  Instead we just cruise along, thinking, nope, not yet, until we realize "Oooh.  Okay, so it turns out I'm not still developing; I'm actually done, and have been for a while.  Oops."

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WobblyWallaby

I was 19. I finally decided to come out as bi and then a friend and I started going into detail what I felt and she told me I sounded asexual....I had never heard the term but it made so much sense...If she hadn't done that I'd probably still think I was bisexual....a very very confused and unhappy bisexual.

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18 when I started to realize I was on the ace spectrum (I initially thought I was gray-ace, and only later figured out I was fully asexual) and 19 when I realized I was biromantic.

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Ytterbium

Either: 13-14 when I discovered that most people see sex very differently than I do.

or: 17 when I discovered the word "asexual", and other ace related terms.

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I was 24, although I haven't always been 100% certain 100% of the time.

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Purple Wanderer

Old enough to have known better

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Biblioromantic

Just before my 37th birthday. I'd never heard the term asexuality before that, but it took me all of two days to identify myself that way. Suddenly everything made sense.

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smallnsparky

I was 22/23, I was in university and I had just watched a segment about asexuality on the BBC and it all finally fell into place for me. I had a boyfriend when I was 18/19 and sex stuff happened and I enjoyed it to a degree, but I'd get bored/frustrated with make out sessions etc, and he'd get bored/frustrated that I wanted to go and read or play video games instead. Not going to lie, I don't really feel bad about that. We weren't together long (and he wound up dating a girl who looked shockingly like me, but not into nerd stuff) and it didn't feel much like a relationship so much as a booty call as we barely went on dates even. I cannot comprehend how that's any fun for anyone (but yooo maybe that's why I'm ace??!)

 

I'm mostly hetero, though I also keep an open mind, much the same for demisexuality - I'm never going to say never because while I'm not a natural optimist, I don't rule out the chance I might possibly bond with someone enough one day to want to physically be with them. And I might get to leave the house with.

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EngineeRaven

It was halfway between 19 and 20. Took almost a year to believe it to about 95%. (5% fault tolerance) I'm still working on acceptance.

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I first thought I might've been ace at 16, but I didn't really figure it out until recently and I'm 20.

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“It was when I discovered the term for asexuality” says half of the AVEN population. 

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About 2 yrs ago, so around the age of 22. I kinda figured I was odd before that but I didn’t know what asexuality was at the time.

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I don't think it's ever too late to discover oneself, simply because how could we truly understand ourselves if we don't have the knowledge to know what we are or what something means. So no, not too old - I've only started to understand myself few years back when I was 21/22

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Muir Caileag

I was 19, after a LOT of self-discovery, 3am discussions and experimenting, finally managed to settle :lol: I don't think it's too old, I agree with @Feawen, you have got to be able to udnerstand yourself first; and there's no particular age in which that happens :)

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I'm 17 and currently figuring it out. I don't think you're too old from what I've seen around AVEN   :)

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Claire1983

I'm 34 and I just figured it out.  I didn't hear about asexuality until a year ago.  I just knew I wasn't a lesbian so I assumed I was straight and just bad at it.

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Ms. Carolynne

I was 22 when I knew definitively. Finding not only the word, but that there was a community helped immensely.

 

For some time before that I had suspected something was up, but couldn't put a finger on it.

 

I didn't think about my sexuality as an adolescent. I actually thought I was normal, as I had the occasional crush. I didn't know the difference between romantic and sexual attraction.

 

I still have a little uncertainty towards my romantic orientation. I know romantic feelings are rare for me, but I can't say whether I'm demi or gray. Time will tell, for now I'm demiromantic, until proven otherwise.

 

I'm still figuring out my gender as well.

 

I'm also learning about and coming to terms with potential mental disorders I may have.

 

I'm still 22, and still figuring myself out.

 

 

To address your concern, I don't think it's abnormal or too late. A decent amount of people here didn't figure out their orientation until adulthood.

 

It's also typical for people to continue developing their personality into their early to mid twenties.

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I don't think I can actually call it discovering yet, because I am still a bit unsure, but I discovered it this year, and I am 18. I knew I was scared of sex and didn't like it since a long time back, but I found what it meant now. 

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I had always known I was different and experienced romantic emotions differently.  I had heard of the term asexual before but I didn't know enough about it to know that it was me until this year. I'm 15 and I know that is pretty young to find out because asexuality is such an invisible thing that people don't see it around often if at all. I was just lucky I decided to look up some of the terms I didn't know.

 

Im in no position to give advice but I don't think you should worry. I don't think there will be an age that we're not finding out something new about ourselves. Discovering who you are is just as valid if you were 94 as it is if your 14. Knowing yourself is one never ending journey and that's ok no matter when, where or what age.

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