Mike-95 Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I have only just figured out I am panromantic I am 23 years old though isnt that a bit late to be discovering myself? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TheAP Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was about 17 when I figured out I was asexual. It's not too late - many people have discovered their sexuality even later than that. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Gnat (Natalie) Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I didn't figure out I was asexual until right around my 21st birthday, and it was still another couple months before I realized I was demiromantic, so, no, that's not too late Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike-95 Posted May 1, 2018 Author Share Posted May 1, 2018 Just now, The Gnat (Natalie) said: I didn't figure out I was asexual until right around my 21st birthday, and it was still another couple months before I realized I was demiromantic, so, no, that's not too late I am still not sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TheAP Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 4 minutes ago, Mike-95 said: I am still not sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ? You could call yourself demi-panromantic. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Gnat (Natalie) Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 1 minute ago, Mike-95 said: I am still not sure if I am panromantic or demi romantic what would a mix of both of those be ? Demi-panromantic. Pan/bi/homo/hetero/etc. describes what sex you're attracted to. Ace/demi/grey/allo/etc. describes the degree or frequency of attraction. They go together. Allosexual people just don't (typically) include the prefix because it's assumed that people are allosexual until stated otherwise. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike-95 Posted May 1, 2018 Author Share Posted May 1, 2018 2 minutes ago, The Gnat (Natalie) said: Demi-panromantic. Pan/bi/homo/hetero/etc. describes what sex you're attracted to. Ace/demi/grey/allo/etc. describes the degree or frequency of attraction. They go together. Allosexual people just don't (typically) include the prefix because it's assumed that people are allosexual until stated otherwise. I dont think I have ever been close enough to someone before to find out if I am demi or not. only time will tell I guess Quote Link to post Share on other sites
XIII Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was 20 (this was last June) when I figured it out. My problem was that I never knew that there was a word to describe what I felt or that it was even a sexual orientation 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SomeoneWhoLikesPizza Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 14, discovered it existed about 3 weeks ago and 2 weeks later I was pretty sure I’m ace. I’m now thinking about my romantic orientation (grey-romantic until further notice). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
knittinghistorian Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I think it can take an especially long time for ace people, because there isn't a sudden "I want sex!" moment. Instead we just cruise along, thinking, nope, not yet, until we realize "Oooh. Okay, so it turns out I'm not still developing; I'm actually done, and have been for a while. Oops." 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WobblyWallaby Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was 19. I finally decided to come out as bi and then a friend and I started going into detail what I felt and she told me I sounded asexual....I had never heard the term but it made so much sense...If she hadn't done that I'd probably still think I was bisexual....a very very confused and unhappy bisexual. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
danvers Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 18 when I started to realize I was on the ace spectrum (I initially thought I was gray-ace, and only later figured out I was fully asexual) and 19 when I realized I was biromantic. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ytterbium Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 Either: 13-14 when I discovered that most people see sex very differently than I do. or: 17 when I discovered the word "asexual", and other ace related terms. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rare Aztec Whstling Chickn Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was 24, although I haven't always been 100% certain 100% of the time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Purple Wanderer Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 Old enough to have known better Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Biblioromantic Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 Just before my 37th birthday. I'd never heard the term asexuality before that, but it took me all of two days to identify myself that way. Suddenly everything made sense. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smallnsparky Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was 22/23, I was in university and I had just watched a segment about asexuality on the BBC and it all finally fell into place for me. I had a boyfriend when I was 18/19 and sex stuff happened and I enjoyed it to a degree, but I'd get bored/frustrated with make out sessions etc, and he'd get bored/frustrated that I wanted to go and read or play video games instead. Not going to lie, I don't really feel bad about that. We weren't together long (and he wound up dating a girl who looked shockingly like me, but not into nerd stuff) and it didn't feel much like a relationship so much as a booty call as we barely went on dates even. I cannot comprehend how that's any fun for anyone (but yooo maybe that's why I'm ace??!) I'm mostly hetero, though I also keep an open mind, much the same for demisexuality - I'm never going to say never because while I'm not a natural optimist, I don't rule out the chance I might possibly bond with someone enough one day to want to physically be with them. And I might get to leave the house with. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EngineeRaven Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 It was halfway between 19 and 20. Took almost a year to believe it to about 95%. (5% fault tolerance) I'm still working on acceptance. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RK800 Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I first thought I might've been ace at 16, but I didn't really figure it out until recently and I'm 20. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lichley Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 “It was when I discovered the term for asexuality” says half of the AVEN population. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Laplace Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 About 2 yrs ago, so around the age of 22. I kinda figured I was odd before that but I didn’t know what asexuality was at the time. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Looking for a name Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I was twelve 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Feawen Posted May 1, 2018 Share Posted May 1, 2018 I don't think it's ever too late to discover oneself, simply because how could we truly understand ourselves if we don't have the knowledge to know what we are or what something means. So no, not too old - I've only started to understand myself few years back when I was 21/22 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Muir Caileag Posted May 2, 2018 Share Posted May 2, 2018 I was 19, after a LOT of self-discovery, 3am discussions and experimenting, finally managed to settle I don't think it's too old, I agree with @Feawen, you have got to be able to udnerstand yourself first; and there's no particular age in which that happens Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Leilamy Posted May 2, 2018 Share Posted May 2, 2018 I'm 17 and currently figuring it out. I don't think you're too old from what I've seen around AVEN Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Anchy97 Posted May 3, 2018 Share Posted May 3, 2018 I found out about two years ago but I didn't dwell on it until now. I'm 20 now so I guess I found out when I was about 18-19 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Claire1983 Posted May 4, 2018 Share Posted May 4, 2018 I'm 34 and I just figured it out. I didn't hear about asexuality until a year ago. I just knew I wasn't a lesbian so I assumed I was straight and just bad at it. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ms. Carolynne Posted May 4, 2018 Share Posted May 4, 2018 I was 22 when I knew definitively. Finding not only the word, but that there was a community helped immensely. For some time before that I had suspected something was up, but couldn't put a finger on it. I didn't think about my sexuality as an adolescent. I actually thought I was normal, as I had the occasional crush. I didn't know the difference between romantic and sexual attraction. I still have a little uncertainty towards my romantic orientation. I know romantic feelings are rare for me, but I can't say whether I'm demi or gray. Time will tell, for now I'm demiromantic, until proven otherwise. I'm still figuring out my gender as well. I'm also learning about and coming to terms with potential mental disorders I may have. I'm still 22, and still figuring myself out. To address your concern, I don't think it's abnormal or too late. A decent amount of people here didn't figure out their orientation until adulthood. It's also typical for people to continue developing their personality into their early to mid twenties. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Madao Posted May 4, 2018 Share Posted May 4, 2018 I don't think I can actually call it discovering yet, because I am still a bit unsure, but I discovered it this year, and I am 18. I knew I was scared of sex and didn't like it since a long time back, but I found what it meant now. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Puffy Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 I had always known I was different and experienced romantic emotions differently. I had heard of the term asexual before but I didn't know enough about it to know that it was me until this year. I'm 15 and I know that is pretty young to find out because asexuality is such an invisible thing that people don't see it around often if at all. I was just lucky I decided to look up some of the terms I didn't know. Im in no position to give advice but I don't think you should worry. I don't think there will be an age that we're not finding out something new about ourselves. Discovering who you are is just as valid if you were 94 as it is if your 14. Knowing yourself is one never ending journey and that's ok no matter when, where or what age. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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