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Think someone was hitting on me? Help!


hward

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There's a small shop I go in a few times a month for gas bottles and there's a new person working there now. He's probably about my age (25) or a bit younger than me and he speaks to me every time I go in. I've just been in today and he seems really friendly with me - calling me love and asking me what I do (farmer) and what animals I have, what I do etc while we were loading the car. I think he'd have kept on talking to me if he hadn't had to go and serve someone else.

 

My problem is I have no idea if he's generally just being friendly or if he's doing it for a reason as in something more. I've recently come to the conclusion that I'm aro and ace (although still a bit wobbly about it) and I have very little experience in these kind of things. Literally no one has ever shown any interest in me, or at least I've never realised that they have.

 

If he is being more than just friendly then what do I do? This sort of thing literally terrifies me. And not going there any more isn't as option. Sorry for the long winded post.

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Hey hward

 

This situation is sticky, I feel for you.

 

I guess the most honest thing you could do is either come out as aro ace or friendzone them. But neither of these are that easy to execute... For now it sounds like they are just being friendly, I don't it's necessarily anything romantic is this stage. However it wouldn't hurt to be cautious so maybe keep an eye out if they start doing the stereotypically flirty things towards you. If you show that you aren't comfortable around them in romantic sense, they may naturally back off too. In my opinion, just try continuing a platonic relationship and see if anything develops from their end (:

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I would say given the environment, it's likely they're just being friendly since you're a regular customer.  It's really hard to say honestly, but for now I would just keep things friendly and professional and if they say anything that's clearly a move then you can explain that you're not interested.

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I wouldn't come out as aro ace to him. Someone you're rejecting may not believe you that you are aromantic and/or asexual, they might assume that you used it as an excuse.

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Poor guy. If he only knew how much you're freaking out because of it... ^^ Ok, let's be more serious now. I'd just play along in a polite way, not giving much thought to it. Try not to stress out about this situation that is most probably more harmless than you think. It's not like he could kidnap you for a date or something. However, if he makes an obvious move, you'll simply tell him that you're not interested. There is no need to tell a stranger that you're aro ace - I'd bring this up only if the person would be my close friend whom I really care about. ^_^

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Thanks everyone.  I certainly wouldn't come out as aro ace to him...not planning on doing that with anyone at the minute.  I guess what I'm most terrified of is not even realising that he's flirting etc because I literally wouldn't know what it was if it jumped up and bit me.  I'm not used to anyone being as friendly as he was today so it put me completely out of my comfort zone.  I'm probably worrying about nothing, I kind of freaked out.  Still, at least I don't need to go back for a couple of weeks!

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