Jump to content

Bisexual but more sexually attracted to men


Jitterbug

Recommended Posts

    So I'm bisexual. I had always thought that you had to be closer to the 50/50 attraction spectrum to different/same genders but had recently realized/come to terms with the fact that that is not true. So I'm more so 70% attracted to men and 30% attracted to woman. After realizing this I began to search more into myself so I could understand who I am.

    I am attracted to males and females both sexually and romantically but I would way more prefer a male when it comes to sex. For example if I am out I will instantly spot hot guys but not so much woman, i find woman more sweet and aesthetically pleasing. So I could be instantly attracted to a girl but more often I would find attraction based off of her personality and energy that she carries herself with. So I am a sexual person so I feel like I would have sex with a woman but would be more turned on by a man. The idea of kissing, cuddling and just being with a girl is really nice, as it would also with a guy but in different ways. Is there any label for something as complex as this? Thank you! Sorry if this does not make sense please ask questions and I will try and clarify as much as I can. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh yes, there really isn't a rule that you have to be 50% attracted to men and 50% attracted to women. In your case, even if you would prefer being with a man but are still somewhat attracted to women, that's still considered bisexual. It's really not too complex! :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
Duke Memphis

I've got a good friend who likes both men and women but prefers women. You're pretty much just an inverse of my friend in that respect.

Link to post
Share on other sites

To add to what's already been said, sometimes, for example, a bisexual may be attracted to both men and women, but actually only romantically attracted to one gender (so only pursues relationships with one gender), though they can still have and enjoy sex with the other gender there just isn't a romantic component. I don't think it's ever really an exact 50/50 split!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey Jitterbug

 

Firstly, welcome to AVEN!

 

I can relate to what you're saying. Even though I am ace, if I were put in a sexual scenario I feel like I would be able to tolerate dick much better than vag, etc. I don't think anyone can be 50/50 bi all the time, somedays are straighter or gayer than others. I definitely go through phases within my bi-ness.

 

I think the Kinsey Scale is a rather helpful guide (:

 

tumblr_inline_nvuwm8zGqh1s0q1be_1280.png

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, bisexual can be anything between attraction only to this one gender to attraction only to this other gender. In general I see it as "attraction to more than one gender". I'm bi, and my attraction changes, sometimes more towards men, sometimes more towards women. In the past, it has been pretty much 100% women as well for quite some time, now it's changed.

And as it has been said, romantic and sexual attraction don't have to overlap completely at all. I'm pretty much aro, but given the perfect circumstances I'd be more open to date a woman than a man. Even what the attraction feels like can vary between the genders. My attraction towards men is more platonic than what I've experienced towards women. And nonbinary people are a completely different deal as well.

Sexuality is quite complex, so basically everyone would need to have a distinct label, if you go about it that way. That's why I like the term bisexual so much, it's quite broad and includes potential fluidity. But you can also go for queer, as it seems even more broad.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, it doesn't have to be an even split.  In fact, it probably rarely is exactly even.  People usually develop leanings toward one or the other, however slight, in the same sort of way that even if you like cake and pie you'll probably still prefer one over the other.  Or if you think both pirates and ninjas are cool, one of them would still be the victor in a fight.

 

The people that would call themselves bi are mostly just people for which those leanings are not strong enough to totally shut one of the sexes out.  For the straight/gay people, they generally are.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all for the wonderful and helpful advice and insight I really appreciate it! It's no nice to see such a positive group of people and community here to share their stories and help others who are still learning and figuring it all out like me! Much love! 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...
On 2018-04-02 at 4:05 AM, Gldlynch said:

Hey Jitterbug

 

Firstly, welcome to AVEN!

 

I can relate to what you're saying. Even though I am ace, if I were put in a sexual scenario I feel like I would be able to tolerate dick much better than vag, etc. I don't think anyone can be 50/50 bi all the time, somedays are straighter or gayer than others. I definitely go through phases within my bi-ness.

 

I think the Kinsey Scale is a rather helpful guide (:

 

tumblr_inline_nvuwm8zGqh1s0q1be_1280.png

I'm so glad you posted. Something like that as a theory came to me during a commuter train ride last year. I messaged it to another AVENite and they thought it was possible that there could be a 'range' between hetero' and homosexual behaviour.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Deus Ex Infinity
On 2.4.2018 at 6:22 AM, Shay21 said:

Oh yes, there really isn't a rule that you have to be 50% attracted to men and 50% attracted to women. In your case, even if you would prefer being with a man but are still somewhat attracted to women, that's still considered bisexual. It's really not too complex! :)

Shay's totally right. I don't see any problem here. There's no 50/50 rule or something. It only means that you're basically interested in both genders. It's ok to prefer one side. I guess most bisexuals do.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...