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Love Language


purpleandgreylife

What are your love languages?  

71 members have voted

  1. 1. What is your primary love language (with the highest score)? (If you have two scores that are equal, you have two primary love languages)

    • Words of Affirmation
      9
    • Quality Time
      47
    • Receiving Gifts
      3
    • Acts of Service
      15
    • Physical Touch
      12
  2. 2. What is your secondary love language (with the second highest score)?

    • Words of Affirmation
      22
    • Quality Time
      15
    • Receiving Gifts
      3
    • Acts of Service
      24
    • Physical Touch
      17
    • N/A
      1
  3. 3. What is your tertiary love language (with the third highest score)?

    • Words of Affirmation
      23
    • Quality Time
      8
    • Receiving Gifts
      16
    • Acts of Service
      15
    • Physical Touch
      7
    • N/A
      8
  4. 4. How would you describe your ideal relationship (generally, I know each person will have their own nuances)? Check all that apply.

    • Happily single by myself
      13
    • Happily single, spending time with close friends every now and then
      27
    • Platonic partnership without physical contact
      11
    • Platonic partnership with physical contact
      25
    • Platonic partnership with sexual contact
      2
    • Romantic partnership without physical contact
      8
    • Romantic partnership with physical contact
      41
    • Romantic partnership with sexual contact
      8
    • Surprising each other with gifts "just because"
      23
    • Doing nice things for each other
      40
    • Talking to each other about anything
      50
    • Spending quality time together
      49

This poll is closed to new votes


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purpleandgreylife
18 hours ago, LadyFie said:

My ideal relationship would probably contain less sex (my boyfriend is quite a sexual person). But we are both willing to compromise, and he definitely respects that I don't really have the same needs regarding physical intimacy as he does. It probably helped that I never lied to him about it; as soon as I understood that this is just the way I am, I told him, suggesting he should probably look for someone else, if he felt like it would be too big of a problem for him (and telling him that I wouldn't be mad). He thought about it and decided he wanted to stay with me because he loved me.

Apart from that, my relationship is pretty close to being perfect. My boyfriend is very caring and understanding, he is often the one to make sacrifices for me, and, most importantly: he is my best friend. He is the first person I talk to about problems, things that make me happy or just anything that comes to my mind. There are few things we don't know about each other.

@LadyFieThat is great to hear! I am really happy for you! Finding someone who understands who you are and respects you and cares for you, is not easy. I am glad that you have found someone so caring and understanding! Not to mention having a relationship that is close to perfect! It's really encouraging to hear that!

 

Thank you for sharing your experience! I wish you all the best!

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purpleandgreylife
16 hours ago, WobblyWallaby said:

10 Words of affirmation

9 Quality Time

5 Acts of Service

3 Physical Touch

3 Receiving gifts

@WobblyWallaby Thank you for sharing your results! That's interesting to me. Do you find these results are pretty accurate in the way you relate to other people? Did you expect some scores to be lower or higher?

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Here's for me  :)

 

8 : Quality Time

8 : Words of Affirmation

6 : Physical Touch

5 : Receiving Gifts

3 : Acts of Service

 

I already took it and answered the census before, but I wanted to retake it and think more carefully. Those seem more correct I think  (but if I could remember what it gave me before it would be easier)

 

EDIT : I got it. Acts of Service dropped from 3rd place to last. I'm not really sure what "Acts of Service" is supposed to mean tbh.

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purpleandgreylife
37 minutes ago, Leilamy said:

Here's for me  :)

 

8 : Quality Time

8 : Words of Affirmation

6 : Physical Touch

5 : Receiving Gifts

3 : Acts of Service

 

I already took it and answered the census before, but I wanted to retake it and think more carefully. Those seem more correct I think  (but if I could remember what it gave me before it would be easier)

 

EDIT : I got it. Acts of Service dropped from 3rd place to last. I'm not really sure what "Acts of Service" is supposed to mean tbh.

@Leilamy Thank you for participating in the census! I'm glad that you were able get answers that seemed truer to who you are.

 

I think "Acts of Service" is supposed to mean that you show affection or appreciation for others/relationship partners (relationship to me is how you relate to other people) by doing things for people. Like, an "Act of Service" may be doing the dishes because you know the other/s in the relationship appreciate things being neat and tidy. Or giving someone a ride so that they don't have to walk when the weather is too much (too hot, too cold, rainy, etc). That's how I interpret  the meaning of "Acts of Service."

 

Some of these concepts are a bit vague and open to interpretation, but I think that might be intentional. I'm not completely sure. For me, many of these languages go hand in hand. Like "Quality Time" and "Words of Affirmation." You spend time together, you talk, you talk positively to and about one another. Again, that's my interpretation. What do you think? 

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With those question, I saw more the aspect "helping doing the chores, homework" etc... because they emphasize on that. And I took the time to think that when my parents propose me to help with my homework, I don't link it with love or anything. Tbh I prefer to do things on my own, to be sure they're as I want to so...  Maybe last is a good place. Paying attention to what others like and don't like, and reacting accordingly definitely is important though so.. *shrug*

 

Words of Affirmation and Quality Time both sound good : I don't expect of people to be WHOLLY concentrated on myself like they can explain (I don't feel unloved because they checked their phone while we're together or anything, I do it a lot). But I'm really annoyed when I talk and they go talking to someone else, or just don't hear me/pay attention. So it still fits I suppose.

Words of Affirmation are important I think. My best friend always send me a meaningful text on my birthday, and I look forward to it each time. I'd be disappointed to not get one. Also, people telling me I'm doing good and being a good friend and everything is really important to me and makes me feel better. That's part of why I decided to always say to my friends "I love you" randomly, to remind them of that fact and ignore the whole "romance" who is usually linked to those word.

 

Though they're not that important to me, I buy lots of small gifts for my loved ones. They're part of how I show my love, but not part of what I expect from others I guess ?

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purpleandgreylife
3 hours ago, Leilamy said:

With those question, I saw more the aspect "helping doing the chores, homework" etc... because they emphasize on that. And I took the time to think that when my parents propose me to help with my homework, I don't link it with love or anything. Tbh I prefer to do things on my own, to be sure they're as I want to so...  Maybe last is a good place. Paying attention to what others like and don't like, and reacting accordingly definitely is important though so.. *shrug*

 

Words of Affirmation and Quality Time both sound good : I don't expect of people to be WHOLLY concentrated on myself like they can explain (I don't feel unloved because they checked their phone while we're together or anything, I do it a lot). But I'm really annoyed when I talk and they go talking to someone else, or just don't hear me/pay attention. So it still fits I suppose.

Words of Affirmation are important I think. My best friend always send me a meaningful text on my birthday, and I look forward to it each time. I'd be disappointed to not get one. Also, people telling me I'm doing good and being a good friend and everything is really important to me and makes me feel better. That's part of why I decided to always say to my friends "I love you" randomly, to remind them of that fact and ignore the whole "romance" who is usually linked to those word.

 

Though they're not that important to me, I buy lots of small gifts for my loved ones. They're part of how I show my love, but not part of what I expect from others I guess ?

@Leilamy I'm the same way. People checking their phones while we spend time together doesn't bother me. It also doesn't bother me if I'm sitting and the other person is standing or walking around during our conversation. But yes, being ignored is not okay and that has happened to me a lot. I've been talking to friends and I can just see them not listening to me, but expecting that I should listen attentively to them. Also, it bothers me when I feel like we aren't on even footing with the amount of information we're sharing.

 

I've had past friendship where they know everything about me and I know very little about them, because I shared everything and told them anything they wanted to know and I either didn't ask them questions back or they never really gave a straight answer. I've also experienced knowing everything about a friend (the ones that won't listen to me but expect me to listen) and realize they know very little about me. So, "Words of Affirmation" are definitely important for me, but I always put it with quality time.

 

With gifts, it varies depending on my income to be honest. Ideally, I would buy gifts for people I care about occasionally. If I see something that reminds me of them or that I know they would like, I would like to be able to buy it for them. I also don't expect the same thing back from them though. It's interesting.

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
FallenAngel9799
11 Quality Time
9 Physical Touch
6 Words of Affirmation
2 Acts of Service
2

Receiving Gifts

 

I won't be surprised if, say, my girlfriend told me I'm a raging cuddle monster; as a bonus, I will also be a sex god to my beloved GF/wife/zucchini who makes sure they get mind-blowing lay from me.

 

Also, socializing in large groups tends to drain me, so if I choose to spend my time with you, consider it a massive privilege from me.

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  • 10 months later...

@purpleandgreylife

 

This poll is being locked and moved to the read only Census archive for it's respective year. As part of ongoing Census organisation, and in an attempt to keep the demographics of the polls current with the active user base at the time, the polls will last for one year from now on. However, members are allowed and even encouraged to restart new polls similar to the archived ones if they like them.

  

iff, Census Forum Moderator

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