warta

question for demisexuals? (2)

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warta

1-when you are already in a connection with someone

What sort of sexual acts do you enjoy with him/her?can they be any sexual act (hj -bj-sex with all kind of positions)

I mean do you become like a normal sexual person but only towards this person or it still differs?

2-what do you feel about sex jokes?

Can they be funny and all?

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Float On

I am demiromantic 

 

When I am already in a connection with someone, I enjoy connecting with them. It isn't until I form romantic feelings that I experience romance in that enjoyment. That experience changes the nature of what I want to do with them, and changes the nature of what I appreciate doing with them. 

 

there is no one normal sexual person. there is only the aggragate average of what is most common. no one meets that criteria perfectly, because it is actually smaller, more focused, and less diverse than any individual's experience of sexuality. 

 

sex jokes make me cringe. romantic jokes? what is a romantic joke? Gushy romantic songs bother me. I've never had a partner I was in love with, so I don't know if that would change, it might. Romantic songs that tell a story, I enjoy. Romantic songs that are passionate from the writer's or singer's personal experience and emotions, I enjoy. romantic songs whose message can be applied to platonic relationships, or relationship with god, or relationship with my self, I can enjoy. 

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noparlpf

Honestly no idea, I've never had sex and I'm not really sure what I would hypothetically be into.

 

Depends what kind of jokes. Bad puns or double entendres are usually fine.

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Dia Nicole

1 I've never had sex but I do know I have only ever had sexual attraction to one person

2 I think this probably depends on a lot of things but especially the environment in which you grew up. For me I grew up with sex jokes everywhere so even though I might not always understand them I can find them funny and even make them. I also do a lot of research which I have found you should never do when you don't understand a sex joke, it can scar you for life. 

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Cut/Mix/Print

Hi there!

 

I have a question regarding this. I recently had my first sexual encounter, but it wasn't "sex" it was just a lot of touching "down there". 

My question is is it normal for it to hurt, because I don't understand why it was so pleasurable and then hurts at the same time. Even the next day it still hurt.

 

Is this normal?

 

Please let me know. 

Thanks.

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roland.o

Hello @Cut/Mix/Print, I think it would make more sense to post your question as a separate topic.

It's not really a "question for demisexuals", and not related to the questions the thread opener raised. Therefore, many people who could answer your question will simply miss it, because they don't read this thread.

 

Also, consider to post in this sub-forum: https://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/137-the-sex-talk/

 

:cake:

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RK800

1. I'm a virgin, but when I experience sexual attraction I basically like the stuff that typical sexuals like I suppose.  Though I am a fair bit kinky.

 

2. Sexual humor can be funny, but it usually bores me the same way most bodily function humor does.

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Maristine

I’m in a sexual relationship with another demisexual. Our sex drives and sex lives are similar to allow people (at least I assume). It’s just the frequency of attraction is 1 or 2 out of all the people we’ve ever seen or interacted with in the world. We enjoy most positions and most “types” of sex (piv, hand stuff, oral) except anal. No shame if that’s something people are into, but it’s just something neither of us is interested in.

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Deus Ex Infinity
On 3/29/2018 at 6:57 AM, warta said:

1-when you are already in a connection with someone

What sort of sexual acts do you enjoy with him/her?can they be any sexual act (hj -bj-sex with all kind of positions)

I mean do you become like a normal sexual person but only towards this person or it still differs?

2-what do you feel about sex jokes?

Can they be funny and all? 

#1 Almost anything but oral from my side. Exclusively reserved to my one & only.

#2 A total 'no-go'

 

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Marlow1

I don't think there is such a thing as a normal sexual relationship, I think they all differ a lot

 

I am a man and I am Demisexual, my partner is an Allosexual. Long story short, keeping the romance alive is what has kept our relationship strong. Here what Sheila is discribing includes some of the things we do together to keep our relationship working at it's best

 

https://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2018/01/top-10-marriage-habits-to-cultivate-this-new-year/

 

I have to be careful with jokes. In the past I have hurt my partner deeply with certain jokes. A good measure that I use is, would I be happy telling my gran this joke. If the answer is no, you can bet your life that my partner will not like it. Everybody is different with this though. Me, I think I can laugh at most jokes, it would be rare for me to take offence. I might not actually get the joke though, Mmm, yep, that is common for me !

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grande-americano

1. I'm married to an allosexual. And honestly we had sex before I even knew I was demi. I identified as asexual, and truly believed I wasn't demi until about 6 months after we had been having irregular sex (as an asexual, this was very tiring, and I loved being close but sex was a bit of a chore). All of a sudden I went from being emotionally exhausted after sex, to looking forward to it. I started enjoying myself, and realizing sex had more depth to it than I initially thought. When I told this to my then boyfriend, now husband, all he said was "oh, so you're demisexual?" And that was that. Now we have a fairly normal sex life, I think?

(Before anyone says anything or asks, we were both consenting adults, and sex was my choice and at my speed. No abuse or anything like that.)

 

2. Classy sex jokes are fine. But I dont like crude jokes just for the sake of being crude. 

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embracetheace
On 3/28/2018 at 9:57 PM, warta said:

1-when you are already in a connection with someone

What sort of sexual acts do you enjoy with him/her?can they be any sexual act (hj -bj-sex with all kind of positions)

I mean do you become like a normal sexual person but only towards this person or it still differs?

2-what do you feel about sex jokes?

Can they be funny and all?

1. Both of us are still new to sex so we've done mostly vanilla stuff, all of which I enjoy. I guess you could say I'm [insert partner name]-sexual at this point. I do have a sex drive that seems to only be driven by her. i.e. When we spend a lot of time together I'm more likely to desire sex, her teasing can very easily turn me on. I still have trouble masturbating to the idea of sex with someone, even if it's my partner. I just can't really masturbate to the thought of someone in general. I usually have to use porn as an aid to get myself off. I should note that even before I knew I was demi and thought I was asexual, I did have a libido (though it was pretty small before I became sexual with my partner).

 

2. Some sex jokes are good. I'm pretty perverted tbh, BUT if people are joking about sex in a way that makes it seem like they'd seriously enjoy/get turned on by whatever we're talking about, I feel really uncomfortable and and slightly repulsed.

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