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Ace/aro screening


babygyrl09

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Hey all! I'm asexual and aromantic, but not sex- or romance-repulsed, and have seen multiple posts about watching a movie or show or reading a book and getting squicked by a random sex/romance scene out of nowhere. So I had this idea to offer my services to screen media for those who don't want to be squicked by *surprise sex*. If you post a title (and tell me what medium it is: book, movie, tv), and what your comfort level is (optional), I will try and give a non-spoiler review of the sexy/romantic level.

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An additional resource for sex repulsed peeps is imbd. It’s a website that usually has “parental guidance” section. It warns about nudity (sometimes specifically which sex) and warns about the kinds of acts/if it’s explicit/implied.

 

Don’t think it has anything on romance as typically people don’t see that as something to warn about.

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Luftschlosseule

This is only for sexual violence, but it might be a good starting point: https://www.unconsentingmedia.org/

This side tells you if violence happens on-screen, is only implied, happens to minors... It's just a list they tick off, so it's relatively spoiler-free and you can get warned if you need to be warned.

 

Something similiar, only for different phobias: https://www.doesthedogdie.com/

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6 minutes ago, Luftschlosseule said:

Something similiar, only for different phobias: https://www.doesthedogdie.com/

That's actually where i got the idea. Someone sltold me about that website, and i thought if anyone was intetested, I could do something similar.

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Luftschlosseule
3 minutes ago, babygyrl09 said:

That's actually where i got the idea. Someone sltold me about that website, and i thought if anyone was intetested, I could do something similar.

It surely is awesome!
And I think it is best if you have more than one person to do this, so you have bigger chances of covering the relevant medias. But the only way I can think of, short of adapting the system to a whole website, would be making lists on imdb and GoodReads.

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19 minutes ago, Luftschlosseule said:

It surely is awesome!
And I think it is best if you have more than one person to do this, so you have bigger chances of covering the relevant medias. But the only way I can think of, short of adapting the system to a whole website, would be making lists on imdb and GoodReads.

Yeah, I definitely would like if more people want to help, because if I just did the stuff I like, it would be a whole bunch of fantasy, sci-fi, and paranormal/supernatural books, and a lot of action/adventure movies, unless someone requests something specific.

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Luftschlosseule

I'd like to help. I could try to make notes as I go, and I am constantly reading stuff.

Currently, I tag books at GoodReads if there's a sex scene in there, but I thought about adding tags. What would you suggest?

- sex
- sex implied
- romance?

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Implied sex (fade to black)

Unncessary romance (just because there's a male and female mc, there has to be a relationship)

Explicit sex scene

Explicit sex scene w/important plot details (so you can't acutally skip it)

Does not pass Bechdel test (link is tvtropes, beware)

 

What really bugs me is when I'm reading a genre that is not romance or even a sub-genre of romance, and there's an unncessary relationship. Like, a mystery, where there's a female detective or investigator who just has to have sex with a witness/partner/cop friend/source, because she's female and he's male. If it was a relationship centered book, I would be okay or even expecting it, but WHAM! It hits you, right out of the blue. And next book, she's with someone else.

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5 hours ago, babygyrl09 said:

What really bugs me is when I'm reading a genre that is not romance or even a sub-genre of romance, and there's an unncessary relationship. Like, a mystery, where there's a female detective or investigator who just has to have sex with a witness/partner/cop friend/source, because she's female and he's male. If it was a relationship centered book, I would be okay or even expecting it, but WHAM! It hits you, right out of the blue. And next book, she's with someone else.

I really hate unecessary romance/sex. It’s usually sudden and it has ruined books/movies for me. Sometimes it takes away from the female (like she was strong/independent, but afterwards she’s suddenly all over a guy and drops everything for him or something. (If she stays the same afterwards though, I don’t mind as much))

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Luftschlosseule
16 hours ago, babygyrl09 said:

Implied sex (fade to black)

Unncessary romance (just because there's a male and female mc, there has to be a relationship)

Explicit sex scene

Explicit sex scene w/important plot details (so you can't acutally skip it)

Does not pass Bechdel test (link is tvtropes, beware)

 

What really bugs me is when I'm reading a genre that is not romance or even a sub-genre of romance, and there's an unncessary relationship. Like, a mystery, where there's a female detective or investigator who just has to have sex with a witness/partner/cop friend/source, because she's female and he's male. If it was a relationship centered book, I would be okay or even expecting it, but WHAM! It hits you, right out of the blue. And next book, she's with someone else.

Heh, I just assume nothing passes the Bechdel test by default and so am able to be surprised.

 

But there's the problem: When is a relationship necessary and when not? Sure, there are these cases you mention in which he's the guy so he has to get the girl. Those are just badly written and when writing a review, I would tell people to go and find something else to read.

Then you have stories that are better-written, but you wouldn't need the romance for the book to work. And, lastly, you have necessary romance - only because of the character developement something gets found. So I'd split romance up like you did with sex.

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