Changing Stevi's Sexuality :)

[Stevie Converse]

This is a thing that is going on with me. I am curious if any other trans/asex folk have experienced something similar. Writing this I realized I may qualify as greysex, but I still will refrain from partner and solo sex. Forever. The story explains this.

 

When I meet someone new (guy or girl) and if I like them, as a potential partner, I get sexually hot for them. But I think it through. Usually with someone I just met, there's not an opportunity for sex anyway. I have no desire to hang out with the kind of people who will have sex with a virtual stranger. Not that I judge, I just think it's yucky and I don't need that kind of energy in my life.

 

So. When the urges come, I do what sober alcoholics call "play the tape through." I think about how having sex would mess up any emotional connection I may have with the person, and how dirty and let down I always feel after sex. If I get an erection, thinking of the person, I just enjoy the feeling while letting it pass. That happened this morning, in bed, and I just repeated out loud "you do not masturbate" (I was tempted to, but again, I remind myself that a few seconds of pleasure are not worth feeling gross afterwards). 

 

Anyway, after a while, usually no more than two weeks, my sexual feelings have abated. I am free to pursue either a romantic. aero, or conventional friendship with the person. My male genitals and libido are dying. Having the testicles removed is really just a formality at this point. After a few months on HRT, my friends tell me I won't be able to get it up at all (I'm starting HRT in May, but won't have bottom surgery for at least a year). All of this makes me feel wonderful and helps me understand that I am on the right path.

 

[butterflydreams]

1 hour ago, Stevie Converse said:

After a few months on HRT, my friends tell me I won't be able to get it up at all

YMMV, but this is unlikely. Random erections and “morning wood” will probably cease, but you’ll probably still be able to get an erection if aroused. I wish it wasn’t that way myself, but it is.

[Stevie Converse]

2 minutes ago, butterflydreams said:

YMMV, but this is unlikely. Random erections and “morning wood” will probably cease, but you’ll probably still be able to get an erection if aroused. I wish it wasn’t that way myself, but it is.

OK. Well, like I say, the hardons are not entirely unpleasant for me. I just know I'm better off not touching it. Meds, age, and poor health made me pretty much impotent anyway, until I started my transition and everything improved. But in the end, bottom surgery will solve this problem for both of us (I apologize if you aren't planning bottom surgery; it's not good to assume, but I think we talked about that before).