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AVEN's Prioritization of Gender Issues


Pramana

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On 25/02/2018 at 12:32 PM, butterflydreams said:

The fact that they're asexual members of an asexual site isn't germane to the situation. I believe that opinions on gender should be allowed everywhere. Gender discussions used to be like that. I don't like the insinuation that trans people are helpless little meltable snowflakes. That couldn't be further from the truth. I think it's good to be challenged, and to challenge back. Otherwise how is anyone going to learn anything.

 

That said, there's a fine line between challenging and just being a dick. I'd like to think we're all big boys and girls here, but I know that's not always the case. Saying something like "if someone has a penis, they're a man to me" is at best an uninformed opinion. If someone stated that, I'd expect they'd be open to challenge, as they should be. But just saying that and walking away, or ignoring all contrary evidence is being a dick.

Regarding the penis comment, I'm actually thinking of a specific ace member who actively wanted to have these discussions because to him, someone with a penis truly is a man and he wanted to be challenged and have his mind changed (though as far as I know it never was changed). He got really slammed for legitimately wanting to have these discussions not because he's a bigot  but because it's a  valid scientific  opinion. And the reason I was spinning it as 'asexuals on an asexual site' is because I was trying to keep this on topic of the OP, however I agree gender discussions should be able to be had anywhere regardless of who is involved (unless it's a gender safe space, in which case I understand only having opinions that won't hurt any trans people of course).

 

That aside, if someone is a public figure they should be fair game the way Donald Trump is, OR NO PUBLIC FIGURE SHOULD BE FAIR GAME. People say really mean things about not only Trump here, but Trumps supporters, and we have members on AVEN who are Trump supporters. Yet those mean comments are still allowed. So I kind of figure all public figures should be fair game or none of them should. Again though, that's a different topic entirely.

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Calligraphette_Coe
1 hour ago, Chimeric said:

 

I'm not objecting, I'm just observing. It was received warmly (I was quite touched by that), and it isn't my goal to villianize the gender discussion forum by any means - I think it's an important forum, and I've learned a lot from lurking through the threads there.

 

I fall under the LGBT+ umbrella, and I've witnessed radicalized segments of the trans activist community viciously (verbally, thank goodness) attack other members under the same umbrella because they're cis. I know that those are outliers they in no way represent the majority of the trans population, and I don't expect it to happen here on AVEN - but I also can't help but worry about it a tiny bit, that's all. :lol:

Just last year (and some of the trans people posting to this thread saw it, too), I shared part of my story and despite my stating my preferred pronouns, I was deliberately misgendered by a ciswoman. Who was not cited, who never apologized. 

 

I was once viciously attacked on a Yahoo Group called "No Transition" by someone who started to transition and felt the need to try to shame people like me who weren't. The moderator was a post-op woman, and she responded by repeating the words of a British SRS surgeon:

 

"HRT separates the boys from the women." At least that isn't tolerated on AVEN. That group died when the intended audience saw what a crock it was since those people took over. So, I'm well aware that sometimes, transpeople are not above hoisting the Jolly Rodger themselves.

 

Several years ago in Hot Box, in a thread brought up during "Remembering Our Dead" week, some of us posted about Tyra Hunter,  a transwoman left to die after a traffic accident when the paramedic and doctors discovered she was trans. The best you could get from the Hot Box crowd about the injustice was similar to what you saw recently: They had a free speech right to decide whom to or not treat on the basis of their prejudices and religious beliefs. The actually said the paramedic and doctors SHOULD NOT have been fired, nor should any sensitivity training be forced on them. Well, when the taxpayers had to pay off the two million dollar suit for wrongful death? Oooops, they still didn't change their tune!

 

I've noticed that a lot of the people on that thread have since left AVEN, but absolutely NOT ONE of them was cited for any infraction-- they left of their own volition, probably when people decided they felt a little ooogy about being friendly to people who lack any kind of empathy.

 

Here's the Wikipedia link about Tyra Hunter.

 

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyra_Hunter

 

 

 

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butterflydreams
2 minutes ago, FictoVore. said:

Anyway, you see this sort of thing so commonly in the 'vocal' part of the trans community these days (among younger teens I mean) that it's actually spawned this whole 'transtrender' meme that is now having a very negative impact on the trans community as a whole. These people (as a direct result of being confused about what 'cis' implies) are causing many people to discredit the authenticity of many actual trans people (children and adults) who suffer deeply with gender dysphoria etc.

Yes! Fucking thank you. 

 

3 minutes ago, FictoVore. said:

Regarding the 'cis' thing.. I am not trans, although I had gender dysphoria to the extent of being suicidal and actively self-harming growing up, and I'm still uncomfortable with feminine pronouns being directed at me, and it would be a lot easier NOT to be this gender (though it also feels that no other gender would be easier) but I'm not trans. Therefore even the implication that being 'comfortable enough' being something someone like me experiences is still quite hurtful and frustrating. Obviously not all 'cis' people experience gender issues to the extent that I have, but some do... despite not being trans. So yeah 'cis' in general is just a term that I hate and think should be abolished personally.  I'm not meaning to offend you or anything like that though, I really like you and respect your opinions, I just have very strong opinions about the term 'cis' as a result of the things that I have experienced in relation to my own gender despite not being trans. :cake:

I mean, linguistically, it's useful to the extent that it prevents you from having to say trans vs "not trans". But truth be told, in my head, I'm most often thinking trans vs normal. I think your experience with dysphoria, and the fact that you're not trans is an important one for people to hear. I'm not offended or anything. I'm not particularly married to the term "cis" anyway. I could certainly live without it. 

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butterflydreams
6 minutes ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Just last year (and some of the trans people posting to this thread saw it, too), I shared part of my story and despite my stating my preferred pronouns, I was deliberately misgendered by a ciswoman. Who was not cited, who never apologized. 

I still feel bad about not bringing that incident to the attention of the mods when it happened. For that I'm sorry :(

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Calligraphette_Coe
11 minutes ago, FictoVore. said:

 

Regarding the 'cis' thing.. I am not trans, although I had gender dysphoria to the extent of being suicidal and actively self-harming growing up, and I'm still uncomfortable with feminine pronouns being directed at me, and it would be a lot easier NOT to be this gender (though it also feels that no other gender would be easier) but I'm not trans. Therefore even the implication that being 'comfortable enough' being something someone like me experiences is still quite hurtful and frustrating. Obviously not all 'cis' people experience gender issues to the extent that I have, but some do... despite not being trans. So yeah 'cis' in general is just a term that I hate and think should be abolished personally.  I'm not meaning to offend you or anything like that though, I really like you and respect your opinions, I just have very strong opinions about the term 'cis' as a result of the things that I have experienced in relation to my own gender despite not being trans. :cake:

I wouldn't hate it one bit if the 'cis' term went away. I'll be there is only one other person here who knows the history of the term, who popularized it and how much a divisive element in the community they were. You haven't seen a rightful flame war until you saw some of those from the mid 90s on Usenet. Those make what happens here on AVEN look like Woodstock's Summer Of Love.

 

Do you have a preference for a replacement term? I'd really like to know!

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27 minutes ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Just last year (and some of the trans people posting to this thread saw it, too), I shared part of my story and despite my stating my preferred pronouns, I was deliberately misgendered by a ciswoman. Who was not cited, who never apologized. 

I strongly disagree with that because on AVEN, any specific member should have a right to be called what it is that it makes them feel most comfortable. They may not get that courtesy in the 'real world' but on AVEN it's really not hard to just call someone 'she' if they want it (or he, or if they only want to be known as 'a dragon' or whatever, I don't see why that's so hard as long as they aren't using that identity to hurt other people!!). I would have reported that if I'd seen it and made sure it was dealt with by mods, regardless of what side of the argument I was on. 

 

18 minutes ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Do you have a preference for a replacement term? I'd really like to know!

Another reason I don't ID as trans is just because literally no 'other' term works any better, whereas I know some trans people can feel more comfortable if one term is directed at them as opposed to a different term.  I feel kind of awkward and strange regardless of what's aimed at me, kind of like, it's just having a 'body' that's become the issue, if that makes sense? Generally it's not an issue because people just say stuff like 'you' and 'ficto' when directing comments at me, it's not too common that someone else is talking about me which is when they would need to call me 'she' or 'they' or whatever. I just let people say 'she' if they do it in the course of a discussion, or 'mother' (as I have kids) even though it still feels like those terms are being applied to someone who isn't me, but yeah, it's weird and confusing lol.. I used to ID as ''non-gender-specific-consciousness inhabiting the body of a biologically female H. Sapiens Sapiens'' and that's probably the closest I can get to describing what feels comfortable to me when it comes to 'gender' :P:cake:

 

 

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34 minutes ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

Just last year (and some of the trans people posting to this thread saw it, too), I shared part of my story and despite my stating my preferred pronouns, I was deliberately misgendered by a ciswoman. Who was not cited, who never apologized. 

I am sorry that happened. =(

 

Quote

I was once viciously attacked on a Yahoo Group called "No Transition" by someone who started to transition and felt the need to try to shame people like me who weren't.

Human beings possess the most imagination on the planet, and we waste it by drawing divisive lines where none exist.

 

Quote

They had a free speech right to decide whom to or not treat on the basis of their prejudices and religious beliefs. The actually said the paramedic and doctors SHOULD NOT have been fired, nor should any sensitivity training be forced on them.

For what it's worth, I'm in stark disagreement with this. Paramedics and doctors are under oath to serve all of humankind. It's their cross to bear, to save the lives of the good guys and the bad guys with equal effort. 

 

Edit - Uff, the way I worded that makes  it sound like I think Tyra was a bad guy. I don't. Awkward phrasing, I'm sorry! My point is they don't get to choose, sorry, sorry. That was bad, haha.

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20 hours ago, Pramana said:
20 hours ago, ChillaKilla said:

It’s not your writing style (although it DOES read rather like something I’d find on r/iamverysmart), it’s that WE DO NOT SEE YOUR POINT IN POSTING THIS.

I will take that as a compliment.

Trust me, it's not a compliment.

 

Quote

PLEASE JUST FUCKING BACK OFF NOW I'M NOT HERE TO BE ATTACKED BY FOUR OR MORE PEOPLE AT ONCE OKAY

I hear not being wrong (as well as not invalidating a large group of people) helps a bit with the whole "feeling attacked" thing.

 

Based on what I've seen in this thread from you, yeah, you totally had this coming.

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23 minutes ago, Philip027 said:

Trust me, it's not a compliment.

I think it's fantastic. I visited that Reddit subform and was suitably impressed with all the brilliant commentary.

Meanwhile, this thread has achieved "hot" activity status, so at least it was effective at generating discussion.

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Calligraphette_Coe
39 minutes ago, FictoVore. said:

 

Another reason I don't ID as trans is just because literally no 'other' term works any better, whereas I know some trans people can feel more comfortable if one term is directed at them as opposed to a different term.  I feel kind of awkward and strange regardless of what's aimed at me, kind of like, it's just having a 'body' that's become the issue, if that makes sense? Generally it's not an issue because people just say stuff like 'you' and 'ficto' when directing comments at me, it's not too common that someone else is talking about me which is when they would need to call me 'she' or 'they' or whatever. I just let people say 'she' if they do it in the course of a discussion, or 'mother' (as I have kids) even though it still feels like those terms are being applied to someone who isn't me, but yeah, it's weird and confusing lol.. I used to ID as ''non-gender-specific-consciousness inhabiting the body of a biologically female H. Sapiens Sapiens'' and that's probably the closest I can get to describing what feels comfortable to me when it comes to 'gender' :P:cake:

 

 

::::sighs::::: That language is SOOO ill suited to the task. I know what you mean. As an engineer, I can say "I want that in 316", and they'll know EXACTLY what alloy of stainless steel I want and probably what it's being used for.

 

And you've probably noticed my grizzly bear Momma side. I know what a bad time I had growing up, and get a little protective when the people I care the most about have to walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Identity Death.

 

There was a book that came out about 15 years ago called 'Darwin's Children'. Here's a blurb about it:

 

Quote

A human endogenous retrovirus called SHEVA begins to spread, attaching to people's chromosomes. As it becomes active, it causes the birth of millions of genetically altered children. To the government, this represents a deadly threat to public health and safety, so they take the mutated children from their parents and place them in concentration camps. The children communicate by using complex verbal tricks, enhanced facial expressions, and psychoactive chemical scents made from their own bodies. They also form stable groups that minimize conflict and maximize cooperation. Mitch Rafelson and his wife, Kaye Lang, have a SHEVA daughter named Stella Nova that they try to shield from the government's Emergency Action forces, but the child is captured and sent to a camp. A government virus researcher, Christopher Dicken, makes significant discoveries, as does Kaye.

The Shiva children have a way of communicating things like feelings and notions of gender by freckles lighting up in different colors and patterns on their faces. I wish we could do that. Or sing someone's gender, such that it came across like the Star Trek IDIC  (Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations).  And one of the most touching quotes is when the human mother tells her SHIVA daughter "Oh honey, you were SOOO beautiful with her."

 

We are soooo much more than chromosones afloat on a sea between Charybdis and Scylla.  :(

 

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, Philip027 said:

I hear not being wrong (as well as not invalidating a large group of people) helps a bit with the whole "feeling attacked" thing.

 

Based on what I've seen in this thread from you, yeah, you totally had this coming.

Kick as hard as you like.

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Damn, what happened here?

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2 hours ago, butterflydreams said:

I still feel bad about not bringing that incident to the attention of the mods when it happened. For that I'm sorry :(

I feel bad for not knowing it happened.  Next time you see that (hopefully there won't be a next time) please report it.  That sounds horrible.

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The thread is now being unlocked. With this, I'd like to remind members to attack the argument, not the individual. Furthermore, if you are upset by a situation, take a step back, take a deep breath, and come back when you're calm. If you cannot do that, either place the member on ignore or just leave the member alone. Do NOT take any issues you have from this thread outside of this thread. If a member is breaking TOS, report them.

 

Faeriefate, PPS mod

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I've always had 2 theories on this.

 

  1. The soul searching many aces go through to find the asexual term brings a larger part of the LGBT umbrella to the forefront of the minds of asexuals. For many other labels, (gay, bi, trans, cis, straight, etc) you don't necessarily need to be exposed to a thousand labels (hyperbole) to find themselves, so most of their journey is more self-acceptance. So they may identify with something that they haven't come across, but just not been bothered enoguh to FIND that term because "close enough". For instance, I don't really identify as any gender (not even agender). Pretty sure there's a term for that, but it hasn't bothered me enough to find it. 
  2. Asexuals aren't that accepted. The gay community often shrugs us off because we can pass for "normal" (whatever that means). The straight people don't like us because of logic that makes no sense to me. Plus both just think we're either in the closet or "haven't met the right person" or "late bloomers" or whatever. So it's kind of the mindset of, "I mean they already don't accept me, so why not just be me?" Not saying people aren't authentic outside of the ace community. Just saying when you're already seen as "Weird" it's not like being "weirder" really matters that much.

Then again, these are just theories. I could be wrong on both accounts. I just take these from my personal experience.

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On 2/24/2018 at 4:04 PM, Chimeric said:

I'm fearful that cissexual, asexual folks may be made to feel marginalized in their own community space.

 

On 2/24/2018 at 8:09 PM, butterflydreams said:

I sure hope this doesn't happen.

 

Just to throw it out there: This is pretty much how I feel. It wasn't always this way, but I have started to identify AVEN as a place where the site/staff's primary allegiance is to gay/trans/lefty people/issues/perspectives. I don't think I'm alone in this either.

 

I know you can't really enforce quotas on backgrounds and opinions and such, but a situation where there are so many (often extremely vocal) non-white/LGBT/lefty members is made worse by the fact that it's also reflected so strongly in the staff, the site rules and the moderation decisions. I'm happy to voice my (potentially unpopular) opinion and be left to hold my own in the ensuing debate/firestorm; I'm less happy knowing that having my post deleted/hidden and/or my account banned is just a click away, should someone decide to cry victim loudly enough or go running to their mod BFFs.

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7 hours ago, Tercy said:

identify AVEN as a place where the site/staff's primary allegiance is to gay/trans/lefty people/issues/perspectives

There is a lot of irony in the fact that this thread was closed (albeit temporarily) the way it was and in following the situation that it did.

 

If anything it emphasizes the underlying issue here, in that unilateral application of certain ToS components negatively impacts the broader population.

 

You're afraid to speak up for yourself as an ace person on the largest ace forums on the net - that's a problem.

 

Now, if you were to spill out actual bigotry, that's a different issue - but given how so many of us tiptoe around certain issues to avoid setting people off, I think the issue is less with speaking bigoted opinions and more with potentially speaking bigoted opinions - an impossible thing to police.

 

The is an ace forum. There are trans and NB aces and they deserve the same respect as cis aces and should absolutely be made to feel welcome here, there's no question about that - but everything about this current situation illustrates a flaw somewhere in the pipeline, at least to me. 

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Calligraphette_Coe
On 2/28/2018 at 2:19 PM, Chimeric said:

There is a lot of irony in the fact that this thread was closed (albeit temporarily) the way it was and in following the situation that it did.

 

If anything it emphasizes the underlying issue here, in that unilateral application of certain ToS components negatively impacts the broader population.

 

You're afraid to speak up for yourself as an ace person on the largest ace forums on the net - that's a problem.

 

Now, if you were to spill out actual bigotry, that's a different issue - but given how so many of us tiptoe around certain issues to avoid setting people off, I think the issue is less with speaking bigoted opinions and more with potentially speaking bigoted opinions - an impossible thing to police.

 

The is an ace forum. There are trans and NB aces and they deserve the same respect as cis aces and should absolutely be made to feel welcome here, there's no question about that - but everything about this current situation illustrates a flaw somewhere in the pipeline, at least to me. 

But isn't that flaw a function of intersectionality and the possible fact that some aces can't accept that intersectionality in other aces? Ask yourself: there are a lot of sexual people in these forums, yet there is far less friction between them and aces than there is with trans ace people? Why is that? I mean there are rules against asexual elitism and no one seems to have a problem with those. Yet, you throw transgenderism into the mix and suddenly everything blows up? IDK, is the flaw that causes that cisgender elitism? The absolute insistence by some that chromosonal assignment at birth is the alpha and the omega, case closed, sucks to be you if something other than that informs on your sovereign identity?

 

Jus sayin'......

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On 28/02/2018 at 11:55 AM, Tercy said:

but a situation where there are so many (often extremely vocal) non-white/LGBT/lefty members is made worse by the fact that it's also reflected so strongly in the staff, the site rules and the moderation decisions.

 

What the heck is this? Are we now at a stage where people want to make AVEN white only? I'm getting sick.

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5 hours ago, timewarp said:

 

What the heck is this? Are we now at a stage where people want to make AVEN white only? I'm getting sick.

 

I didn't mean to suggest that people from different races are a problem; just that it's another example of where differences/animosity/other can arise, another area where there's the potential for mod decisions to be skewed by "political correctness" and "virtue signalling", etc.

 

Also, I never suggested that the AVEN membership should be anything-only. I'm fine with whatever demographic happens to exist, but it becomes a concern when the "institution" that is supposed to be dedicated to asexuality starts "taking sides" (either officially or covertly) on non-asexual issues.

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butterflydreams
2 hours ago, Calligraphette_Coe said:

But isn't that flaw a function of intersectionality and the possible fact that some aces can't accept that intersectionality in other aces? Ask yourself: there are a lot of sexual people in these forums, yet there is far less friction between them and aces than there is with trans ace people? Why is that? I mean there are rules against asexual elitism and no one seems to have a problem with those. Yet, you throw transgenderism into the mix and suddenly everything blows up? IDK, is the flaw that causes that cisgender elitism? The absolute insistence by some that chromosonal assignment at birth is the alpha and the omega, case closed, sucks to be you if something other than that informs on your sovereign identity?

 

Jus sayin'......

Hmm, that’s a good way of putting it. Cisgender elitism. I think people have an issue with “those transgenders” taking over an asexual site. In a way I agree with them. I can see how they might feel threatened by that. But there are asexual trans people. That’s plain to see too. So what do you do about that intersection? I think as a community we need to decide how we feel about the transgender folks among us. Do we want them to be included or not. If yes, then we need to stick by that. 

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From what I have heard/read/observed here and on several other sites that are discussing AVEN, the problem is not elitism or transphobia. The issue is the domination of gender/trans topics on what is supposed to be a site for Asexuality. It is the content, not the people that is the issue. It is widely acknowledged that trans people are also Ace and that they belong here as much as any other person.

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I don't understand the idea that there are too many trans topics, though. The only place where there are a lot of trans topics is Gender Discussion, so if you don't want to read about that, you can just not go in there. Honestly, the people who make topics like this seem to only be contributing to the notion that AVEN is too focused on gender, by starting more arguments on gender.

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15 minutes ago, TheAP said:

The only place where there are a lot of trans topics is Gender Discussion, so if you don't want to read about that, you can just not go in there.

I never go to the gender forum. I still see lots and lots of gender/trans threads.

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butterflydreams
1 hour ago, Evil said:

From what I have heard/read/observed here and on several other sites that are discussing AVEN, the problem is not elitism or transphobia. The issue is the domination of gender/trans topics on what is supposed to be a site for Asexuality. It is the content, not the people that is the issue. It is widely acknowledged that trans people are also Ace and that they belong here as much as any other person.

I guess the only perspective I can offer is that being trans kind of dominates your life. So my question would be what’s the issue with seeing trans people discussing things outside of the gender forum? We’re here, we’re also asexual. I think there are probably two main areas outside of the gender forum where you might see trans topics. One is PPS and Hotbox, the other is the general asexual forums (Q&A, Relationships, etc). I don’t see why there should be any issue with talking about trans topics in PPS and hotbox. They’re interesting (and often contested) topics and those forums are good places to talk about interesting things. As for the other forums, if I post something in there, chances are being trans is going to affect it somehow. Should I just ignore that part? I mean, I’m happy to, but sometimes I can’t. Some relationship question is invariably going to involve me being asexual and trans. 

 

I think I see what you’re saying, but I don’t want to discourage trans people from including their experiences elsewhere on the site. Even if that experience is shaped by being trans. For what it’s worth, I don’t think PPS and hotbox are exclusively about asexual issues anyway. They’re more general forums where people can post about basically anything. 

 

Maybe a more direct question would help. What can I as a trans person do, or how can I change my behavior, to keep this site more focused on asexuality? 

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4 minutes ago, butterflydreams said:

So my question would be what’s the issue with seeing trans people discussing things outside of the gender forum?

For me, not so much an issue. For others... let me see if an analogy will help:

 

You join a baking forum to learn about baking but half the people on that forum also love football, something which you don't mind but have no real interest in. So, you end up hearing about football a lot even though there is a subforum dedicated to football. It can be really frustrating for people when all they really want is to learn how to get their buns to rise. Then if you mention the forum is supposed to be for baking and that you would like to see more cooking tips and fewer diamond formations you get called a doughelitist or a footyphobic.

 

25 minutes ago, butterflydreams said:

We’re here, we’re also asexual.

Yep, that is why I said it is widely acknowledged that trans people are also Ace and that they belong here as much as any other person.

 

26 minutes ago, butterflydreams said:

I don’t see why there should be any issue with talking about trans topics in PPS and hotbox.

The problem is (again from what I have heard/read/observed) the sheer volume of gender/trans topics.

 

32 minutes ago, butterflydreams said:

What can I as a trans person do, or how can I change my behavior, to keep this site more focused on asexuality? 

If I had all the answers I would be a very rich man but my personal opinion is that everyone on AVEN could and should do more to look at the Asexuality experience.

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butterflydreams
5 minutes ago, Evil said:

For me, not so much an issue. For others... let me see if an analogy will help:

 

You join a baking forum to learn about baking but half the people on that forum also love football, something which you don't mind but have no real interest in. So, you end up hearing about football a lot even though there is a subforum dedicated to football. It can be really frustrating for people when all they really want is to learn how to get their buns to rise. Then if you mention the forum is supposed to be for baking and that you would like to see more cooking tips and fewer diamond formations you get called a doughelitist or a footyphobic.

 

Yep, that is why I said it is widely acknowledged that trans people are also Ace and that they belong here as much as any other person.

 

The problem is (again from what I have heard/read/observed) the sheer volume of gender/trans topics.

 

If I had all the answers I would be a very rich man but my personal opinion is that everyone on AVEN could and should do more to look at the Asexuality experience.

Hmm, ok, that’s fair. I definitely see what you’re saying, and the analogy makes it totally clear. I’m just wondering what specifically can be done, but I guess we don’t have that answer other than maybe to be mindful of topics. I certainly wouldn’t call someone transphobic for not wanting to hear about trans topics. Though I don’t feel that that exact situation has happened. I don’t think people aren’t called transphobic or elitist for saying they don’t want to see trans topics. They’re called transphobic and elitist when they dismiss someone’s identity, which has happened around these parts in the past. 

 

Like I said originally, I think it’s just a topical thing right now. Dare I say a bit of a fad in some ways?

 

I think in all my time here I’ve posted only two topics about trans things outside of gender discussions. I do try to be mindful of creating topics that are more gender focused than not in the asexuality forums. 

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A lot of the topics about asexuality questions and things like that are very personal, so if the individual making it happens to be trans, then obviously that's likely to come into it. That isn't a problem at all.

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I don't see the gender topics as taking over PPS or Hotbox, really. There are a few, but they're still the minority. As for the reason behind it, it might have to do with the fact that this is a site about an identity, and many people are interested in discussing the definition of that identity and who qualifies and who doesn't, hence the plethora of definition debates. That might extend to gender issues as well, as people are interested in talking about which gender identities are "valid" and whether criticism of them should be allowed. And then there's the fact that this site seems to have a higher proportion of trans/NB people than average, for whatever reason. 

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