Romantic4girls Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I guess I’m looking for some validation that I’m in the right place, as I am newly discovering what my “problem” is. I’ve never really understood or identified with this word. Of course, I know what it means, but I didn’t know it was actually a real thing. The word repulses me. I can’t stand to hear it. One of my best friends once said, “I’ve been so horny lately Im going to pop.” What? What does that even mean? I can’t relate. People that are uptight? “They just need to get laid.” I don’t get it. That ache you get “down there?” What ache?I have never experienced such a feeling. Im most likely asexual, I get it. But is there a part of my brain not working? Why do some people experience those very specific sexually driven feelings and I experience NONE of them? It’s crazy! I’m realizing now, that I probably got this from my mother. I believe she was an asexual and it was the reason for my parents divorce. I love myself no matter what. But, although only 1% of the population may be on the asexual spectrum, should there be any cause for concern. Am I missing something? Link to post Share on other sites
Purple Wanderer Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Way I see it is, Sex Feels nice. People see/hear/think of something that reminds of them of it, which makes them want more it, perhaps even become aroused by the thought. Thats how I'd describe horny? Which is pretty much the same way I feel about Pie. Someone at work talks about pie... I keep thinking of pie. I want pie. I go home I'm gonna try and get pie. Link to post Share on other sites
Zatarra Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 No if you are okay how you feel or in this case 'dont feel' there is nothing you are really missing out on. Well I guess you are missing out on the hassles of the dating game, the effort to maintain a relationship and drama that goes on, the heartbreak and the bitterness that follows and that's just the dating world - the married one is even more amplified. If you are okay with how you feel and who you are then there is nothing to be concerned about. The only cause for concern that I have as an Aro-Ace male is the complete lack of support out there for aces. From erasure in media to lack of any real role models to societal pressures. It would be nice if we had a the unity and cohesion that the LGBT community has. That is how they have made it through hard times and the strides they have made in the span of a few decades. It would be nice if we aces had some semblance of that - alas we are too few and too scattered or just plain apathy to do anything to change that Link to post Share on other sites
TheCatBehind Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Well, I know that feeling, which is extremely annoying. But my body is kinda against me in that respect, I think that me having that Y chromosome has something to do with my... annoying needs. But as long as you feel fine and you don’t have some kind of physical repercussions of not flowing additional blood down there you have no problem at all! Link to post Share on other sites
Snao Cone Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I don't like the word "horny" because it sounds immature to me at this point (as a word, not as a concept - kind of like "boobies" for breasts). I have a libido, so it's not a totally foreign concept to me. I know what it's like to feel in physical need of stimulation and release, but not through sex with another person. If you don't have a libido, which many asexual people don't, then I can imagine why it's a foreign concept. It doesn't mean you're defective, it just means you're non-libidoist (as this is often called in the asexual community). I think it's just one of those ways people differ, and it shouldn't cause any concern. Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpy Alien Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 34 minutes ago, Snao Cone said: I don't like the word "horny" because it sounds immature to me at this point (as a word, not as a concept - kind of like "boobies" for breasts). I have a libido, so it's not a totally foreign concept to me. I know what it's like to feel in physical need of stimulation and release, but not through sex with another person. If you don't have a libido, which many asexual people don't, then I can imagine why it's a foreign concept. It doesn't mean you're defective, it just means you're non-libidoist (as this is often called in the asexual community). I think it's just one of those ways people differ, and it shouldn't cause any concern. Agree totally and same about the word, Snao. I don’t have much of a libido even though I’m not asexual so I don’t really know what they mean because I don’t experience that. But yeah either way, there’s no concern raised. Link to post Share on other sites
RK800 Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 I wouldn't worry about it. You're not missing out on anything spectacular, I assure you. Link to post Share on other sites
Janus the Fox Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 The meaning of "horny" can mean differently everywhere. I can only relate to the word because I have and can achieve some arousal an may masturbate to relieve that horniness. No other connection to me really. Link to post Share on other sites
James121 Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 Hungry - wanting food tired - wanting some sleep Horny - would like to have sex Link to post Share on other sites
ben8884 Posted February 23, 2018 Share Posted February 23, 2018 On 2/21/2018 at 12:55 PM, Snao Cone said: I don't like the word "horny" because it sounds immature to me at this point (as a word, not as a concept - kind of like "boobies" for breasts). I have a libido, so it's not a totally foreign concept to me. I know what it's like to feel in physical need of stimulation and release, but not through sex with another person. That basically sums me up but many people do not and that's fine. I have no desire to go sky diving, others do c'est la vie Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted February 23, 2018 Share Posted February 23, 2018 Horny = accurate description of a Highland cattle Link to post Share on other sites
Ytterbium Posted February 23, 2018 Share Posted February 23, 2018 On 21. 2. 2018 at 6:35 PM, Romantic4girls said: What ache?I have never experienced such a feeling. Me neither. Link to post Share on other sites
doggalogga Posted February 24, 2018 Share Posted February 24, 2018 My ex was sexual. She used to tell me she was horny. I asked her how 'horny' felt, because it was totally foreign to me. I feel nothing. Never have. You're told as a teenager that you'll, 'soon have all these strange feelings', but I never understood that... The only feeling that ever came close was taking down the library ghost on the Ghostbusters video game. That was a wild rush! Link to post Share on other sites
James121 Posted February 24, 2018 Share Posted February 24, 2018 The best way I can describe horny or ‘the ache’ is this: Have you ever smelt something cooking that you really love the smell of and love to eat and it makes you think “I could really do with some of that right now”. Whether it’s freshly baked bread or bacon, a nice cake or whatever. When you smell it you just want some now! Horny is just like that except, you don’t have to smell sex first. You just get the effects of the smell without having to smell it. So there you are, the thought of the cake or bacon just enters your mind without you meaning it to happen and you just want it. You want it a lot! Link to post Share on other sites
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